Homeless Person Threatening to Kill My Pets

Hey, anyone got any ideas on how to move a homeless person along?

I've got a homeless person who has decided to take up residence on the banks of the river opposite my house. He has been there for about 5 weeks, haven't had any issues until last week when he suddenly started screaming at me to "Shut my (profanity) Chickens up your (profanity).. this then converted to "(profanity), I'm calling council on youse" to then "I'm going to kill your (profanity)*ing Chickens (profanify)", and then when i went out to my back deck he started screaming at me. I called police immediately as he was off his rocker. For background - I've had these chickens for about 2 years and haven't had any issues from any neighbours.

Police spoke to him; told him I am in my right to keep chickens on my property as its in the local council by-law, and he has no right to be illegally camping. He started claiming he was on crown land and can do whatever he wants. Anyway later that night police came and had a chat to me, said he has been involved in another violent incident at the shopping centre and he is ok when he isn't on the booze. He is currently on parole and the police won't move him along as he has nowhere else to go. They said he hasn't broken any law that would allow them to arrest him. I spoke with Council who have had offices go down and speak to him but nothing is happening on that front.

Basically, I have this aggressive drunk homeless person sleeping effectively in my backyard screaming abuse at me and police and council won't do anything. So, does anyone have any ideas on how I can go about getting rid of him? I've thought about tracking his movement and when he leaves burning his tent down - but then he'd probably just burn my house down.

[edit : included mandatory MS Paint drawing

Comments

  • +35

    Have camea monitoring, ignore. He ll move on.

    • +32

      I'm late to the party so kinda hijacking the top comment here.

      Ants.

      Ants are the (profanity) worst.

      So you need to encourage masses of ants near and around his camping/sleeping area. Spread honey, old chicken bones and pretty much anything you can get your hands on in the general area he is camping to increase the frequency and magnitude of an ant problem.

      The more ants/wasps you can get to congregate in his general area the less appealing his camping site will become and the more like he will be to move on voluntary.

      • +20

        The bones of their own chickens?

      • Extra points if you use fire ants!

  • +61

    Based on the great ms paint diagram, is he going to swim across the river to kill the chickens?

    • +5

      Hah he might. But I wouldn't be game. The rivers around here are meant to be full of bull sharks. But given his unstable nature I wouldn't put it past him.

      • +20

        Just put a pack of 6 on your side of the river and let the sharks take care of the rest.

    • +7

      At least he'd get a much needed wash in the process

  • +81

    7/7 paint diagram.

    Camera monitoring him as suggested.

    Get bright lights to make it difficult for him to sleep.

    Be careful of escalation - he has a lot less to lose.

    • +17

      … so don’t shine bright lights at him

      • +6

        Bright or flashing lights is a more subtle way to get someone to relocate.

        On the topic of bright light, OP could grab a parabolic mirror and sort the tent out Archimedes style.

      • +2

        He definitely needs some bright light in his life.

    • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox5mGYdHmZg

      Some nice music for him as well

    • +4

      show him that MS paint drawing

      He might ask to borrow it for his own Ozbargain forum post

  • +137

    You have a moat already, so I would just build further fortifications for your archers to fire from and to protect your house from siege weaponry such as trebuchets or catapults.

    • +1

      It'll never work. Hobos have a "not so secret" weapon. The Trojan Rabbit.

    • +12

      User name does not check out in this case.

      Anything involving siege weapons is solid advice.

      • +20

        The HMAS Friendship is a warship

        • +2

          Lease it to the govt. We're running low on subs LOL.
          Elon better invent a time machine to deliver AUKUS early. Or maybe Epsteins bestie Trump will tear up the contract so Elon (TGG) can make Tesla electric subs?

          • +1

            @Protractor: I'd buy a nuclear powered self driving Tesla. #AukusForAll

        • I prefer the original HMAS Fatslity.

    • Ha! Yeh true and the moat is most likely full of bull sharks from what people have told me.

      • -3

        New to town?

      • +3

        Bullsharks. Drunk homeless people. Chickens. Useless police. Guessing Karalee?

    • Lol a nice sentry mounted would be good

  • +18

    the drawing is gold haha hope you sort it out

  • +7

    If you wanna do the classic then I suggest you blast classical music towards that direction.

    If you want it more nam style then either "Running through the jungle" or "Fortunate Son" on repeat 24/7. That and some Reolink cameras… you're sweet :P

    • +1

      classical music

      won’t that just lullaby him to sleep?? seems pretty calming.

      (since OP has a sense of humour I feel better about commenting now)

      I would blast this on the train if I wanted to trigger people. https://youtu.be/0Ta-ki-V5o0&t=22

      this line seems appropriate,
      Im (profanity) ritch bitch and your ass is penniless

      • Haha omg I love it. Might be my new anthem song.

        • Use an ultrasonic directional speaker, will add more confusion into his drunken life.

      • +3

        10 hours Tibetan throat singing.

      • I recall some railway station (can’t remember if it was Melbourne or Sydney) started playing classical music with the aim of reducing delinquents hanging about, and reduce graffiti or worse.

        Apparently with some success.

      • Not all classical music is slow and comforting. Besides, as Gitmo has shown us, even pleasant music like the Sesame Street theme can be torturous when played incessantly

        • +1

          but peaceful compared to something that repeats over and over such as DOWN DOWN PRICES RE DOWN!! 😂

        • I imagine it would be hard to sleep with classical music such as Flight of the Bumblebee playing, but I think we can do better than that.

          How about you and everyone you know sing the following song separately then you stitch it all together one after the other then play it out loud.

          This is the song that doesn't end
          It just goes on and on, my friends
          Some people started singing it
          Not knowing what it was
          And now we'll keep on singing it forever just because

          This is the song that doesn't end
          It just goes on and on, my friends
          Some people started singing it
          Not knowing what it was
          And you'll continue hearing it forever just because
          This is the song that doesn't end
          It just goes on and on, my friends
          Some people started singing it
          Not knowing what it was
          And we continue singing it forever just because

    • +4

      Chicken dance song 24/7
      Here is a 10hr version.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FoI5zUQgNGI&ab_channel=tf452

  • +4

    Don't let him sleep. Blast music at him.
    What is the most annoying ear-worm song you could play?
    Crazy frog - Axel F?

    • +4
    • +1

      Chicken Dance

    • +1

      The answer is any nihongo learners tune. Trust me.

      https://youtu.be/bEPagHe6iUI?si=H-zfBSdXsAt60gir

      • How the heck does anyone learn from that. My old dumb brain could not keep up but found it mildly catchy, lol.

    • +4

      Baby Shark

      • Yeah, if you want to take out the whole block..

    • +1

      If you are in Qld, blast the sound of the Eastern Koel

      https://youtu.be/6LhOemKn0kQ?t=81

      … if there is a more annoying bird sound, I don't know what it is.

      • Had one of those parked outside my bedroom window for a good ten minutes at 4:00 am a couple of nights ago. And walked up and down the gutter as a bonus.

        I was seriously thinking purchasing a firearm might be necessary.

        • Yep have had similar experiences. They can sometimes hang around in the same tree/area for months. If I had access to an air rifle I would have taken it out without hesitation.

          • @mshanann: I have managed to hunt off crows and flying foxes with a slingshot using those big yellow plastic pellets. Scares them off but doesn’t really hurt them.
            The light from a high lumen torch is also good for FFs, but you have to hang around for a while as they keep coming back after the fruit for some time before giving up.

            I seriously impressed myself by actually managing to hit a crow once with a pellet. Took a fair bit of sneaking up and he was too busy letting everything within cooee know where his territory boundary was.

    • APT

    • Pretty pointless trying to keep him awake with sound or lights. The guy's a drunk - if he has trouble sleeping he'll just drink another goon bag. OTOH while he's semi conscious he'll be less trouble though.

    • +1

      I for one would go with your namesake. I would very much enjoy BT and Memoriam on repeat, but not a lot of others would.

    • -1

      An endless loop of Pauline H.'s best lines?

      • Pauline Pantsdown on repeat

    • The badger song.

  • +7

    How did I know this was QLD before I clicked on your profile and saw it was QLD.

    Adult time for adult crime! … oh, wait this doesn’t apply here.

      • +9

        Only non-whites can be homeless

        You sound pretty racist my dude.

          • +14

            @Protractor:

            PKB. Pointing out the facts is not racist. Remember that little fish & chip shop pearl of wisdom?

            I have no idea what PKB means, or anything else you just said.

            And seriously, stop shadowing me.

            You have far too high an opinion of yourself. I often reply to stupid comments, it's just unfortunate for you that 95% of what you post falls under that category.

            • +1

              @brendanm: Pot Kettle

              95% … extremely generous.

              • +4

                @randomusername2017: Indeed, probably 99% of my comments are stupid, but I was being generous with this poster. I also don't cry if someone replies to me 🤷‍♂️

                • +2

                  @brendanm: Even poster is being generous.. 6k in 12 months..that's a shit tonne of wisdom imparted in a short period.

      • +14

        What are you going on about? What is meant to be racist about any of this?

        I'm Anglo-Saxon and the homeless person is whiter than me. I would post a picture of the guy to prove my point but even though he is a dick I'm not about to post a homeless person who is down on his luck on the internet.

        • +8

          That poster just does that with anything. Everything is racist, perpetual victim etc etc.

          • -6

            @brendanm: So you are stalking him. Weirdo.

            • +2

              @rufus001: Just another person with no situational awareness or pattern recognition, sad ☹️

              • -1

                @brendanm: LOL!!! Pot Kettle Black. Don't be sad lil man.

            • +1

              @rufus001: Protractor is an interesting one - most of their content is very OTT.

              Don't really mind them that much, however, at one point we had a disagreement and I saw they randomly accused me of following them around and negging them - which was fairly easy to disprove by upvoting their comment.

              • +1

                @ihfree: Is it just me or do people get too triggered by up and down votes? This is just a bargain website at the end of the day. Sometimes I read the forum for entertainment (it's the only version of social media I have), but I genuinely don't care whether people like the stuff I type or not.

                • @kiriakoz: I am sometimes slightly annoyed by downvotes on either my comments or others when I don't feel it is justified. Other users mention being targeted, or like in the case I mentioned just assumed it was someone they had a recent disagreement with.

                  For the most part, I don't really care - it's my (what I deem to be publicly shareable) opinion and it is what it is. I would however, prefer a response over a neg.

  • +9

    time to build that wall on the border to keep the foreigners out.

    • +2

      Well, Victorian refugees at least.

    • +12

      Maybe he could head south and stay in your yard.

      • +1

        already have someone staying with us, but happy to help if possible.

        • +5

          Does the person staying with you yell (profanity) at you?

            • +2

              @wordplay: Well that’s very kind of you. Personally I could only take that on for close family or friends when there weren’t other options for them. I wouldn’t take this on for someone I didn’t have a connection.

    • +31

      Yeh I was originally feeling sorry for him until he went off his rocker and was threatening to kill my chickens and calling me a (profanity). He clearly has mental health problems (and substance abuse) and I don't want to inject myself into his problems as they will likely become my problems when he starts knocking on my door every time it rains or he needs 10 dollars for something.

      • Gonna swim over the river when it rains?

        • +1

          well he's wet already, so…

  • +5

    I recently noticed a tent set up in my local park. I think it was the free Bbq and toilets that attracted him. First thing I did was notify council.

    Next thing was a nice early wake up call with an air horn right next to his tent. Bloke only stayed 2 nights then left.

    Make it as unpleasant as possible for him to stay. You don't want drug affected people hanging around your neighbourhood. Too many people are empathetic towards them.

    • +2

      I live next door to a children's park. I asked council to move on a homeless person based on that. That him and his stash of junk would scare the children, and worry the parents, and the park wouldn't get used for its intended purpose. Don't know whether that convinced the council to do something, or he moved on of his own accord.

      I did suggest a better location. One where he'd have more privacy from passers by, and no-one would see him.

      • Maybe some of the parents gave him an ultimatum.

    • Maybe you should have taken a knife to his tent too? Or thrown away his belongings when he was using the toilets?

      • +6

        I was thinking about returning the stolen trolley to Coles, but decided against it as that would make it harder for him to move on.

  • +1

    How wide is this river? Like if its the Brisbane river I would say who gives a stuff if someone is on the opposite bank yelling.

    • Unfortunately not that wide. It's about 50m from my back deck to his camp. On the plus side it's likely full of bull sharks so there is a chance he could get eaten if he tries to swim across.

        • +9

          It's not like OP breeds bull sharks….

          OP's priority is looking after his family and property which is fair enough.

            • +2

              @Protractor:

              So that's how he'd like it resolved?

              I'd like to see him share your residence with you.

              • +1

                @Caped Baldy: Geneva convention would not allow such atrocities to be inflicted.

              • -3

                @Caped Baldy: This de-ranged imported attitude that anything we don't like in our line of sight needs to be behind walls,swept under the rug,locked up in jail,behind a sign has a familiar de-ring to it.

                • +2

                  @Protractor: I'll take that as a no that you won't the homeless person either.

                  • -7

                    @Caped Baldy: I don't want the moon units migrating here, with their narrow conservative right wing racist attitudes, either.Or the home grown ones.

                    Homeless ppl are the least overall burden on society. Forum validation in place doesn't cut the mustard is resolving OPs 'issue'.

                    As usual there's always more to these stories, probably that it's dross, or that the OP started the blue in some way.

            • +1

              @Protractor: I'm really trying to perform the mental gymnastics where @Name wishes that the person goes and swims in the river and gets eaten? It looks like their just saying that he might not be able to cross because it's dangerous. Is the "privileged private deck" in the room with us right now?

            • +2

              @Protractor: He might be down on his luck but he's also a violent drunk out on parole….

      • Bull sharks got a drunk at my grandparents place in Burleigh heads it’s possible. The guy was a good drunk however decided to swim between to house parties and ended up shark food.

        • Crikey. As in he died?

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