Best Nuclear Bomb Shelters

Wondering what the best deals on nuclear bomb shelters are in Australia. Willing to pay several hundred thousand dollars if it's necessary.

Needs to be able to support an internet connection and withstand a nuclear blast (possibly two) within a 500km radius.

I've seen the one at https://www.undergroundbunkersaustralia.com/bunkers and it's tiny; I want one at least triple this size. Doesn't look like it can survive a nuclear blast either.

Very important that I get this by the end of 2022.

Thanks!

Comments

  • +15

    Amazon may question the free delivery?

    • +1

      Shipping $36,211.42 to your Destination.

    • +3

      Literally url in OPs link probably got most visits it ever will get in it's history.

      Definitely not posted by the business.

  • +35

    what do you hope to achieve post nuclear bomb detonation ,

    • +4

      Become an one hit wonder?

    • +5

      Right? "Fallout 4 but in IRL" seems like one of those living-will-envy-the-dead situations.

    • +10

      Crypto mining. That's what the internet connection is for.

    • +2

      To be only person to post deals on OzB and like as well.

  • +24

    I think Masters had a clearance of these as part of their closing down sale.

    Still can't understand why they went out of business.

    • +1

      The short version is that Bunnings (owned by Wesfarmers) rapidly expanded and improved/renovated their stores the same time Masters (owned by Woolworths Limited) came into the market. Bunnings was absolutely ruthless with their expansion and ultimately pushed Masters out of the market for good.

      • +1

        Plus, "if you find a price cheaper elsewhere, we'll beat it by 10%. "

      • +3

        Also, Masters carried a lot of US brands which Australian consumers were not familiar with

      • +3

        Maybe but I reckon Masters put themselves out of business. The Bunnings model is crazily successful but Masters went their own way and it didn't work. It's a pity as I liked them.

        Bunnings tried to take their model to the UK and it didn't work - which just goes to show that what works in one country might not work in another.

        • +2

          My experience with Masters was I would have bought many things, but everything I wanted had a out of stock ticket , forcing me to go back to Bunnings.

          • +1

            @ziggy1312: There was that but they sold some great stuff. Their quality tool selection - brands like Knipex, Wera, Bahco etc - was superb. They sold 3-phase electrical gear, which Bunnings doesn't. Their paint was very good too.

            When they were going out of business, I got some incredible bargains.

    • Pretty much Bunnings copied Masters by installing aircon in their stores lol

  • +21

    "Very important that I get this by the end of 2022."

    Do you think you know something we don't?

    • +43

      It's a troll post.

      • +19

        I thought trolls lived under bridges, not in nuclear bomb shelters.

        • +3

          Trolls lived in a cav… Oh wait a min…

      • No way….

    • +2

      Or something we should?

  • i have a shelter on my property you can rent when the time comes, was pre existing

    • How big is it?

      • +4

        "It is bigly like the size of a stable genius brain" said Donald Hump

    • +2

      Still in new condition or used?

      • +31

        Mild nuclear scorching, no direct hits.

        No lowballers, I know what i've got!

  • +6

    if you can move to the US, do so, they have a lot of options for preppers, everything we have is pretty meh in comparison.

    • 5m radius circular shelter, 3m deep

      • I'll think about it. Really wanted to own one myself, though

    • +5

      What we have is being less of a target than the USA. Though our pollies are doing their best to change that. In a nuclear war I would rate our chances here significantly higher than even the best preppers in the US.

      • +1

        Just like the book/movie On The Beach. Australia and NZ are pretty much the only countries left after a nuclear war. The movie was filmed in Melbourne in the 1950s - and it's really good.

        • +1

          +1 great book, fantastic piece of aussie film history

          • +1

            @darxtorm: Absolutely. Shute was a brilliant writer.

            The scene at the end where the USS Sawfish is leaving Melbourne is iconic.

            Also staring Anthony Perkins (who played an Aussie) who went on to play Norman Bates in Psycho.

    • Nope, it's New Zealand - half of the Silicon Valley bought land there and building bunkers/supplies there.

      https://www.businessinsider.com/silicon-valley-doomsday-prep…

  • +26

    Needs to be able to support an internet connection

    Are you expecting there to still be deals posted to Ozbargain after the nuclear apocalypse?

    • +4

      Lots of clearance deals, as new slightly radioactive. Bonus: FREE GEIGER COUNTER.

      • +2

        Other way around, the deal is the counter, everything else is a bonus.

  • +6

    The OzBargain way is to duck and cover.

    • +4

      I'll just wing it.

      • Just climb into the fridge like Indiana Jones

      • -1

        I'll just wing it.

        Ah yes, the OzBargain philosophy on car insurance.

    • +3

      Or to quickly check if there is a deal on eneloops

    • MS Paint diagram

  • +8

    Lol,
    No one cares about australia.
    We're like last on the list of places to bomb

    Too far out of the way, small, low density population.

    Maybe if you're in Sydney, but everywhere else…

    • +16

      Darwin says hello.

      • +4

        Yeah. lets be honest they're going to be left to their own devices anyway as we still have the Brisbane Line withdrawal and defend strategy.

    • +8

      I think you'll find that places like Pine Gap, Garden Island, North-West Cape, Nurrungar, are all potential targets.
      Typically you wouldn't expect pure population centres to be targetted - more likely defence and surveillance installations.

    • +1

      We have the early warning stuff for the yanks.
      Plus a few east coast strikes empties the population of Australia so Indo can move in and take the vast remaining land.

    • You should have heard the desperate attempts to claim relevance from some people in Perth when Ukraine was invaded. "Somebody said Perth was big enough yet remote enough to send a message to the world, so Putin's gunna nuke us!"

    • I don't understand how this hasn't become a movie plot point yet.
      "Another Alien/Mutant/Nuclear attack has wiped out New York, London, Tokyo or Seattle. Australia is never affected, so let's all just go there and wait it out"

      • +1

        According to Americans, it's already hell to live in Australia that's why noone bothers to nuke there. There's spiders, snakes, crocs, sharks, jellyfish, and drop bears…

        • 🎵 "Come to Australia, you might accidentally get killed! 🎶

          (No one tell them, let's keep it for ourselves!)

          • +1

            @moar bargains: Honestly it's the easiest server to start your game. Africa is the hardest. South America is the second hardest. The Asia server is the largest and most varied. North American is easy if you pass the school QTE. And the European server is easy as long as you don't cry me a river. Antartica is impossible.

      • +2

        Already been done - in 1959

        https://youtu.be/1DMbRm7HAQw

        It's a great movie. Filmed in Melbourne I believe.

    • +1

      Land of so many resources with sparse population unable to defend itself! With the US at its weakest point ever, who knows for sure?
      Once Putin gets what he wants Xi Jinping will start off with Taiwan, who knows where it will end.
      Just been to Europe: Out of 15 travel agents visited only one has even a brochure about Australia. None of them knew if it even was open for travelers.
      China just needs to take out all comms here and none of the pollies have even shelters. They have huge liquidity issues and we have a calm before the storm.
      Europe is seriously preparing for more issues. Cold War III is surely well on its way.
      With more and more international manufacturers pulling assembly work out of China this could spark more anger trying to get a bigger slice of the worlds actions.
      Non EU countries like Norway and Switzerland have upped their defense spending and secured all of their former airbases with infrastructure upgrades to the latest high tech.

      • +1

        I think if theres anything the ukriane war has shown is that russia is a turd of a war machine hiding behind a superpower ego

        • Perhaps single undisputed rulers of a huge nation can cause headaches for the rest of the world!

      • +2

        'With the US at its weakest point ever, who knows for sure?'

        That's not true. They were much weaker in 1941 - and in 1950 when the Korean war started (which kind of put a rocket up them). Back then they had a genuine adversary in the USSR. China's not in the same league and is extremely vulnerable in terms of maritime trade. The USSR never was to that degree and had a genuine chance of beating America at many points in the cold war.

        • Maybe then at its weakest point since 1950. There is no going back!

          • @payless69: I disagree.

            The CCP, Putin are weaker.

      • Ngl Russia is not as strong as we all thought… Ukraine war has really shown us what its capable of and not. Dont underestimate them they could easily destroy the world with nukes but they are unable to invade countries it seems.

    • +3

      Sydney huh, maybe nuclear attacks can be beneficial.

  • +19

    Needs to be able to support an internet connection and withstand a nuclear blast (possibly two) within a 500km radius.

    What sort of 'internet' do you expect the shelter to support after a nuclear blast? lol

    • +3

      Dial up? or maybe just a LAN to play vidya games with fellow survivors/zombies.

    • +29

      Fibre to the bone.

      • Rolls off the tongue

      • +2

        Sounds like a song from Terminator 2 🎵🤖

      • Haha.. Best comment on this thread

      • +1

        Even FTT-bone will be better than what M.Turnbull dished up.

        • +1

          :)

          Young 'uns have it too good.
          I can remember when it took around 30 minutes to download 1Mb over dial up. I'm quite happy with my wireless NBN.

          • +1

            @EightImmortals: Not to do with speeds my friend, more to do with reliability. And hey, I remember the 14.4kbps dial up days :)

            • @noz: Fair enough then, pretty rare that I've had any problems in that regards too. :)

  • +4

    Will there be internet after the nuclear holocaust?

    • I fully imagine that most of the people that were using social media and the Internet will have been vaporized in the event of a nuclear blast. There won't be anyone left to 'internet' to: anyone human that could be on the other end of the tube just won't be there anymore.

      (So what I'm saying is that Twitter and Reddit will just continue on as they are now, of course.)

    • Of course. How else would I use my crypto stash?

    • Cyberpunk 2077

    • Of course, this was literally what the internet was invented for. (It was originally a US DoD project for a computer network that could reroute traffic even if certain nodes were bombed).

      Exactly what internet sites/servers are running depends on how many nukes and where, though…

  • +7

    Move to southern Tassie, nothing down here worth nukin…

    • +13

      Don't be so harsh on yourself - I'm sure many of us would nuke Tassie if we had a spare bomb!

  • +7

    i think the OP may be using as a dungeon rather than a shelter

    • +1

      Underground meth lab is another possibility.

    • +1

      It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again.

    • Bring out the Gimp!

    • That's what I originally thought too, but if OP was indeed 'based and Fritzlpilled' then why the 2022 deadline?

  • +19

    I'd wait for the one in the ALDI catalogue in October.

    The German ones are really good.

    • +6

      Nah, the Swiss are the masters of bunkers ( and tunnels )
      https://www.timeout.com/switzerland/things-to-do/swiss-bunke….

      • +2

        Just cycled over a formerly abandoned airbase over there.
        In no time the military police picked me up on their infra red surveillance. After a copy of my ID was taken they let me go but warned me not to do it again or be arrested. Prior to that I cycled the taxiway of a former Mirage assembly plant and factory that produces many planes like fighter trainers and also flying doctor planes for WA. Again a security guard became very irate and also insisted to copy my ID. The hire pushbike I rented from a charity but they also wanted to see the credit card I hired the bike with. Now I got 2 security breaches and been warned that the 3rd will end up in court!

        • +2

          Not surprised you got picked up so quick. They were after the Swiss finders fee.

          • @Baysew: Never mind the security guard. Soldiers there do carry latest state of art gear with life ammunition. From now on I stick to marked cycle-ways. No helmet laws there. You do see fake look alike Harley's battery powered and riders need no helmet so far! They were originally sold as 20km/h max scooters but everybody mods them until caught! Cops clocked a very small scooter doing over 100! Scene looks a bit different to NSW.

  • +2

    Get your builder to construct an enlarged version of this to live inside.
    You might need to upgrade the Internet capabilities though ;-)

  • +1

    Well, depends how long you want to live,

    Apparently a fridge (at least the old school ones) worked wonders.

    Not so sure about the fallout though.

    • Are the old round top with are heavy as foo#ers the best?

    • +1

      You need to stop watching Indiana Jones movies.

      • +4

        Neverrrrrr

    • Like Indiana Jones?

  • +5

    Never going to happen "by the end of 2022."…. Will need council approval and will need to be purchased and built and approved etc etc.

    • How long do you reckon it'd take?

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