[April Fools] 澳八根将全面中文化 (Announcement: OzBargain Is Changing to Chinese)

For those too sensitive to see it, yes it is an April Fools Day joke, something that we have been doing every year for the last couple of years. See our April Fools post in 2017 #1, 2017 #2, 2016, 2015, 2014 and 2013. See response.


Original Post
澳大利亚在改变,澳八根也需要改变

澳大利亚 2016 年人口调查指出:

  • 有超过五十万中国出生的华人住在澳大利亚
  • 十分之一的悉尼人口是华裔血统
  • 十万个中国留学生在澳大利亚的大学读书

因为地理上靠近远东邻邦,许多海外学生留下了成为居民以及越来越多的移民,澳大利亚的亚洲话是避免不了的。你只要看看去年澳八根网聚的照片和直播就知道-你将不难发现在在澳八根上占强势的人群是哪些!

但这不仅仅只关乎在澳大利亚的华人人口。还有就是中国的购买能力。最近十年来中国扫空了澳大利亚的奶粉鱼油,买了我们的房子,买了我们的农地,买了我们的煤矿,甚至还买了我们的政府官员。很明显地他们对便宜货也是很有兴趣的。几个星期前我与一个澳八根客聊天,他现在在另一家折扣网站工作,市场是在澳大利亚的中国人。他的网站突然挤爆从中国的访客来买澳洲这的奢侈品(iPhone X, 名牌包等等)假想澳八根也可借此打开有十四亿潜力的市场?喀亲!

所以为了更好地照顾不断改变的澳八根客以及让这网站打开更大的市场,澳八根决定改变它的方向。我们的主题色调将采用中国伟大的红色,而语言也将慢慢地转变为中文。在论坛里每当有人问应该学哪种语言,被推荐的绝对是中文。电视剧萤火虫与冲出宁静号早在十五年前就已经知道未来的人一方面用英文沟通,另一方面用中文粗话彼此诅咒,而我们都知道哪种表达方式更重要!

已完成的改变

  • 网站名从 OzBargain 改成澳八根,并以红色为主题色
  • 最上头选单改为中文
  • 公告都将用中文,但有介于一些土澳语言能力有限,将附上一小段英文概要
  • 主页上小米专用链接。这是澳八根最爱的一个中国品牌,但可惜的是他们还是没有赞助我们复活节的寻宝项目

其他改变计划

  • 要是访客从中国来,自动把价钱转换到人民币
  • Udemy 将提供学习普通话课程的优惠码
  • 房地产优惠讯息,特别是精英中学附近的
  • 链接到代购网站帮助你把所购买的运回中国

最后,谁然我们尚未与党的数据仓库订好协议,但敏感话题还是不要提,比如说西藏与台湾的独立等等。它们会在不通知情况下被和谐掉。

最最后。这边谁有马云叔叔的联络方式?想问问他有没有兴趣收购一个澳大利亚折扣分享网站…


Australia is changing, and so should OzBargain

According to 2016 census and various stats that I cannot be bothered linking to, there are now

  • More than 1/2 million China-born Chinese living in Australia.
  • More than 10% of Sydneysiders claim to have Chinese ancestry.
  • More than 100,000 Chinese overseas students studying in universities around Australia.

China & Australia Flags

With geographic proximity to our East-Asian neighbours, overseas students becoming permanent residents after graduation and increasing influx of immigration — Australia becoming more Asianised is inevitable. Taking a look at photos and livestream from previous year's OzBargain meetups, and it is not hard to figure out OzBargain's dominating demographic.

However it's more than just the Chinese population in Australia. It is also about China's purchasing power. Over the last decade China has cleared out our milk powder & fish oil, bought out our flats & houses, our farmlands, our coal mines and even our politicians — and they are obviously also looking for bargains. A few weeks ago I had a chat with an OzBargainer who now works at a competitor deal site targeting Chinese in Australia. Instead of local traffic, his site is flooded with visitors from China shopping for luxury products in Australia (iPhone X, designer bags, etc). Imagine opening up OzBargain to 1.4 billion potential shoppers?! Ka-ching!!

2018 OzBargain Meetup in Chatswood

So, to serve the ever-changing OzBargain demographic better AND to open this site to a huge potential market, OzBargain has also decided to change its course. OzBargain will now embrace the glorious Chinese-red (our new theme colour) and gradually change the language to Chinese. After all whenever "what language should I learn" got asked in the forums, the answer has always been Mandarin. Firefly/Serenity got it right 15 years ago — in the future most people will speak English and swear in Mandarin, and we all know which form of expression is more important.

Firefly Cursing in Chinese

What's Changing

  • Our name will be changed to ào bā gēn and theme colour to red.
  • Top navigation menu will all be changed to Chinese.
  • Announcement will be done in Chinese, and for those who are linguistic challenged, a brief English translation will also be included.
  • Dedicated Xiaomi link on the home page. That's the Chinese brand we all love. Unfortunately they still won't sponsor our Easter treasure hunt.

Planned Improvements

To realign with our future goal, these changes are planned for the rest of the year:

  • Automatically show prices in ¥ Renminbi if you are visiting from China. We just need a bit adjustment to our implementation last year.
  • Exclusive coupon code for free Mandarin lessons at Udemy.
  • Real Estate Bargains section, especially houses around Selective high schools.
  • Quick links to mail forwarding service to send Australian products back to China.

Finally, while we have not yet finalised a deal with CCP on their "data warehousing" project, it would be impolite to mention taboo subjects such as Tibet or Taiwan independence. These will be removed without notification.

PS: Anyone has Uncle Ma Yun's contact detail handy? I would like to ask him whether he is interested in acquiring a little Australian deal sharing website…

Comments

        • ya but all the same..

        • But…I got headache eating Chinese food that's full of MSG!!!

      • That was a good deal, never thought you could buy MSG online!

      • i actually did buy some MSG after seeing your post. i didnt need 5kg worth, but didnt know you could buy it from ebay so i got a 500gm packet, so thanks :)

      • That was my favourite post! Hahaa.. I was wondering how I’m gonna add flavour to my soon-to-be-former-pet

        PS: dont be offended its a joke. Im not gonna cook my pet. I love my dog very much

    • +1

      There was a racists deal about a gadget that would give you double eyelids and the description on the post being really inappropriate about you should have sex with white people

      • Geez that's horrible. Who was the OP? Should be an instant ban.

      • What's wrong with having sex with white people?

        • +1

          The deal description about having sex with white people had nothing to do with the deal itself about a gadget that would give you double eye-lids, that was what was wrong

  • -1

    Funny. Just spent the Easter weekend in Sydney. That place is not even Australian any more, it's a city of China. Hilarious.

    • You mast have spent your wkend in the china town. there are quite a few korean suburbs in sydney.

      • Nope. But I didn't enter the deep suburbs as you know, I wanted to visit the city.

        • I thought most of the city was closed for the holiday break?

        • @Davesday: No? It's a city, cities operate on holidays and they make fortunes. Sydney was the busiest I've ever seen it.

        • @StoneSin: I had thought most of the shops would close except near Chinatown. Good to know.

    • It's all invaded by Asians not all from China. Define what is Australian though? Australia roots back to Indigenous Australians.

      • Asians exist everywhere and are definitely thriving in the cities, but Chinese are the hanging majority in Sydney and it's bizarre.

        Define what is Australian though? Australia roots back to Indigenous Australians.

        ??? You just answered your own question?

        • Are you then saying the majority of people in Australia are not Australian anymore? I want your opinion on what is defined as Australian.

        • @dingdong3000: When did I say that? I said Chinese people are in Sydney.

        • +1

          @StoneSin: You said that Sydney is not Australian anymore. That's why I asked what your opinion on what is defined as Australian to you. Real Australians are minority in many cities these days not just in Sydney.

        • -1

          @dingdong3000:

          You said that Sydney is not Australian anymore. That's why I asked what your opinion on what is defined as Australian to you.

          Then you answered it yourself.

          Real Australians are minority in many cities these days not just in Sydney.

          Not yet. But it's getting there.

        • @StoneSin: No, you've not answered my question. I want YOUR opinion regarding what is defined as Australian.
          I can say the same thing about what you have pointed out for Sydney in Brisbane too- let alone any other city in Australia. Why be so amused about it?

        • +1

          @dingdong3000:

          We get it, he only thinks White peole can be Australian

        • @dingdong3000:

          No, you've not answered my question.

          Please learn to read. You answered your own question.

          I want YOUR opinion regarding what is defined as Australian.

          Australian people are basically what I think Australians are. Look up Australian culture.

          I can say the same thing about what you have pointed out for Sydney in Brisbane too- let alone any other city in Australia.

          You can, but you would be wrong.

        • @centrelink:

          We get it, he only thinks White peole can be Australian

          You get what?

          When did I say that?

        • @StoneSin:

          doh jin-jia yang-senghi kuna !

          sorry, i only know this line ..

      • +1

        Define what is Australian though?

        Trying a bit hard there mate? I'm Asian and even I get that feeling walking through Melbourne CBD quite often. Full of asians, mostly hear mandarin being spoken, plenty of signs in Chinese only and bad English, it's pretty obvious.

        • +1

          Don't worry, as an Asian they won't be able to tell the difference so Australians will lump you together with the Chinese so you will feel at home

        • @centrelink: yep that's one of the annoying things about it, even though I agree with them a lot of the stereotypes about mainlander in particular from observation are true lol

        • @centrelink: I don't know a single Australian that hears another Australian speak in an Aussie accent and says "You aren't Australian."…

          What narrative are you trying to construct?

        • +1

          @StoneSin:

          Reminds me of the the time I did an oral presentation in high school when I said along the lines of "I am Australian" which was then proceeded to one of my classmates to yell out "No you're not, You're Asian". Then whole classroom started to laugh including the teacher. Maybe I should of laughed with them?

        • @centrelink: If they had said you were stupid, would that make you stupid too? They are some magical kids.

        • +1

          @StoneSin:

          Yeah they did that too. Apparently it just lowered my self esteem

    • -1

      I visited Sydney few years ago and it’s already like what you mentioned. Your comment is a few years late:) I remember at that year Melbourne had lot of Indian immigrants, but now is Asian mostly

      • -4

        Visit again, it's much worse.

      • +1

        But Indians are also Asian so your past and present statement is literally the same thing.. lol

        • -1

          So to make it obvious and clearer, it’s chinese mainland. Even chinese Singaporean don’t like them and Malaysian/Indonesian Chinese don’t want to be associated with chinese mainland (not to mention Taiwanese or perhaps Hong Kong people)

        • @brongz:

          I mentioned that before in this same thread only to be told off that "We don't think the same" which I agree.

        • @JF999: haha your butt hurts mate:) that’s reality. Even my Chinese friend went to USA and he felt not welcomed there
          Stereotyping happens for a reason. Hope you don’t be part of it

        • @brongz:

          Mate I just found it funny rather hurts.
          people enjoyed the prosperity and convenience in here largely created by China at the same time they said I don't like mainland Chinese.

          Action speaks louder than Words.

          Stop buying anything from China.
          Stop using anything from China.
          Look around your house, throw anything out made in China because it's made in China by mainland Chinese.

          It's not like you don't have a choice.

        • @JF999: buy locally. Fresher. I made my choice to help who deserve it most

        • @JF999: dont be part of this https://www.sbs.com.au/news/the-feed/fake-doctors-banned-dru…

          Like I said, there’s a reason behind what’s going now toward certain race, the same like what happens to Muslim/arab with terrorism.
          What happened to chinese now in Australia was already happened in other Asian countries, to name a few in Malaysia, Indonesia, and of course USA under Trump.
          If you want to look to both sides of stories, then you’ll understand.

      • You do realise Indians are Asians right?

        • I do realise it. I learnt it in my geography class:) but in local language here most think Asian is Chinese-look. By the way Korean and Japanese aren’t chinese, pinoy, Viet and thai aren’t too, although here they’re all called as Asian.
          In here Indian is called Indian, Arab is Arab or middle eastern, although geographically they’re in Asia.

    • -1

      It is still Australian. You are confusing it with British. By your definition then all the main cities are not Australian because the aborigines are no longer the majority…

      • No I'm not confusing it with British. British is a big part of Australian culture though.

        By your definition then all the main cities are not Australian because the aborigines are no longer the majority…

        No, when did I say that?

        Aborigines are a big part of Australian culture though, but no where near the biggest.

  • +6

    that was the best April Fools yet, scotty
    no culture group is perfect and it was one day out of a decade (or longer!) people get to have a bit of fun over their contributions to Australia, whether good or bad.

  • Best April fools. Congratulations to the mods

  • Dey tek er jobbb

    • jiu don tok kok

      wee luv centrelink , monehh for nuttin

      • Guys guys you don't need to love me ok?

  • Funny. Just spent a lot of time in Sanlitun in Beijing, Jing'an district in Shanghai, Lan Kwai Fong in Hongkong.That place is not even China any more, it's a site of Australia. Hilarious.

    • Sarcasm only works when you do it right.

    • R they moving to China, buying properties there or studying in China??

  • the 50 cents army must've made a killing over the last few days, more money for bargains :)

  • +8

    I'm Chinese, I didn't mind the Joke page, I thought it was quite funny and shared it with my other friends, we had a good laugh. What I didn't like was the joke posts, they were very racist in nature about baby milk powder formulas and other political posts, I thought that was poor taste but I don't think that was part of the joke. It's ok to be a racist as long as it's on April 1 I suppose/

    • +5

      I agree, I am Chinese too. I find the joke itself is amazing and funny, but some comments are tasteless and over the top. Also these people who think the joke itself is racist, they need to stop and take a chill pill. We Chinese do a lot of this kind of inside jokes to ourself on WeChat, QQ, or forums all the time, we even do it to other countries (for example, US and Trump).

    • +1

      Hm, yeah. I'm Chinese as well and I also shared it with friends cause I thought it was a pretty funny April Fools. Really the only thing I was annoyed about were the joke "bargains", you know, what I actually come to this site for.

    • meh, they just joined in the context of the joke… the intent of being over the top is to make it obvious its a joke

      • Sorry I wasn't referring to whether or not it was obvious, it was obvious to me but still felt a bit uneasy about the joke posts. By your point, we should be more extreme in our racist views to make it more obvious that it's a joke.

        • -1

          err yeah.. thats the intention of making a controversial joke…

  • -8

    @maik @youkatei

    If you really You Are Who You Say You Are who knows?!?, you have became a banana, yellow on the outside but white on the inside, even though you have set down roots in Australia or anywhere else, humans simply cannot run from a sense of belonging, of tribalism, the social connection, which means, if they do not feel it, there is something wrong with them. For many not just Chinese, surely there is the connection, it is natural, some may still harbour sympathy and even loyalty towards their origin.

    • +2

      "The Chinese are too busy making money and chasing success to pay attention to such petty, unprofitable statements"
      See my comments, we are not too busy for jokes, we are human too. I know a lot of people on WeChat/QQ/forums, ranging from my junior high classmates in China to my family members in China, from people in China that I played games with for more than 10 years to people in China I met 1 or 2 years back on MMOs (Many Chinese play on JP or Oceania servers). Contradict to your belief (or your social circle), we do a lot of this kind of self-jokes and nobody has problems with it.

      "If they do not feel it, there is something wrong with them"
      What is this, Year 10 ESL class? Sense of belonging/social connection has nothing to do with this Joke. I can feel belonged to different places, I feel belonged to China because I am from China, I feel belonged to Australia because I spend half of my life here, I feel belonged to the country I did exchange in because it was one of the best memories and period in my life. The term "Second Home" exists for a reason. And I don't see the reason to feel loyalty or harbour sympathy to my origin when this is just a simple APRIL FOOLS JOKE from a site I use daily.

      TLDR: Stop being sensitive and read too much into a JOKE

      • -5

        Obviously you are too insensitive to even feel that it's a poor taste of joke.

    • +2

      DUh what do you think the whole purpose behind foreign migration is?.. Naturally, it's to settle down and become a native of your chosen destination. If you fail that then it's back to where you come from buddy…

      • -5

        You will never become a native. Just so you know the native is Aboriginal people. If you fail to recognised that Australia is made up with immigrants then it's back to where you come from buddy.

        • Aboriginal means indigenous or originating from :
          Therefore anyone born here is aboriginal to the country.
          And also anyone who's here long enough will also feel home too.

        • aboriginal
          abəˈrɪdʒɪn(ə)l/
          adjective
          adjective: aboriginal

          1.
          inhabiting or existing in a land from the earliest times or from before the arrival of colonists; indigenous.
          synonyms:   indigenous, native; More
          original, earliest, first, initial;
          ancient, primitive, primeval, primordial;
          rareautochthonous, autochthonic
          "the area's aboriginal inhabitants"
              relating to the Australian Aborigines or their languages.
              adjective: Aboriginal
          

          noun
          noun: aboriginal; plural noun: aboriginals; noun: Aboriginal

          1.
          an aboriginal inhabitant of a place.
          synonyms:   native, indigene, aborigine, local, original inhabitant; rareautochthon
          "the social structure of the aboriginals"
              a person belonging to one of the indigenous peoples of Australia.
              plural noun: Aboriginals
          2.
          any of the numerous Australian Aboriginal languages.
          

          Origin

        • +2

          @moonleaf: you are trying

        • +1

          Actually foreigners have a history and an origin but the native does not because they come after, not before, a foreign migratory wave. The native is something that is new not old.

          For example, first you get foreigners migrating to a country, then they have a baby. That new born baby is a genuine new native because they occurred naturally in that country rather than migrating a distance.

          So it doesn't matter if you are black, white, yellow or brown skin. As long as you are born in a country then you are native to that country. So all these new babies being born in Australia with parents from China, India, Britain France and wherever else don't represent multicultural Australia but rather new native Australians with no historical culture, no ethnicity and 0 connection with their parents homelands because unlike their parents, they have migrated 0 distance.

        • +2

          The Australian Aboriginals did not originate in Australia. No one belongs anywhere specific. You belong where you can survive. We're all one species on one planet that gets smaller by the day. Humanity continues to consolidate, eventually we will all be one people. Discard nationalism and religion if you have the guts to face reality head on.

        • +1

          @Warier:

          So it doesn't matter if you are black, white, yellow or brown skin.

          What about crispy skin?

    • @maik @youkatei

      If you really You Are Who You Say You Are who knows?!?, you have became a banana, yellow on the outside but white on the inside, even though you have set down roots in Australia or anywhere else, humans simply cannot run from a sense of belonging, of tribalism, the social connection, which means, if they do not feel it, there is something wrong with them. For many not just Chinese, surely there is the connection, it is natural, some may still harbour sympathy and even loyalty towards their origin.

      I am yet to read all of them, but this is by far the most racist comment I have read in this thread. It seems there is no humour in your comment and it is truly racist (not nationist, culturist or religionist). It is disgustingly divisive and I pity your narrow mindedness.

  • Would have 给予好评 that deal. Props scotty.

  • Watched an interesting documentary about African immigration and exodus from Guangzhou recently.

  • -1

    The Chinese are too busy making money and chasing success to pay attention to such petty, unprofitable statements.

  • That wasn't a statement,

    "China is for the Chinese!"

    is a statement.

    • Typographical error, I meant a joke.

      • +1

        Do you mean you attempted sarcasm?
        or just struggling in general

        • @moonleaf: very good cut paste wisdom

  • +1

    Can't help but saying that this is like a bunch of feminists protesting a Milo presentation.

  • +2

    It astounds me the number of people who don't understand the difference between racism and generalities/stereotypes. This probably isn't the most accurate analogy, but I sure as hell wouldn't be offended if another country were to make fun of Australian slang and other stereotypes. Yes there are more historically bad topics in race, but things like Asians being known to be cheap, making light hearted humour about a person's accent does not mean it is racist. As OP has stated, it is the intent that matters at the end of the day. Seriously, there are more important things to be offended about than April Fool's jokes.

    • I agree with this. I find many people get ignorance and racism mixed up too.

      To give an example, when someone says "Asians eat a lot of rice", I personally don't find this offensive - I don't see what's offensive about it. We do eat a lot of rice. However it triggers some people and the racist card gets played.

      • Some culturism/racism is factual and scientific.

        Anthropologists and statisticians know there are significant inequalities between cultures.

        Medical students know there are physiological inequalities between races.

    • +1

      Asians being known to be cheap,

      That should be proudly embraced, cheapness is widely regarded as a virtue here.

    • +1

      People are not offended by the stereotypes like Chinese like baby formula and real estate.

      The post referenced sensitive topics like fearmongering of a Chinese invasion and Chinese sovereignty, both are used in western media to rally anti China sentiment. You cannot compare that with someone making fun of Aussie slang.

      • Yep I get annoyed when I see this in the news. Did I miss something? Is China the enemy?

  • +1

    as usual, Whirlpoo thread about this AFD is full of manufactured outrage and bleeding hearts.

    • What did Whirlpool do as an April Fool's prank?

      • +2

        don't know, its already a joke 364 days a year, another one won't make a difference!

  • +2

    It's getting too easy today trigger right wingers these days. It's a joke guys, China isn't really taking over. Not yet anyway.

    • It will be very subtle. Most of them will look like Chinese through race-mixing. 1st it will be Most Beta White Male who brought back Asian Maiden Wife. Then their Local children will marry with Local. Chinese have a very strong gene indeed. (4chan /pol/ Sarcasm)

  • 2018: in this reality we find ourselves in, everything is fair game.

    Soft underbellies that were once playfully tickled can now be skewered. With a twist.

    Cos Democracy. Cos Capitalism.

  • +2

    This is sooo funny…

    Pity those people who couldn't see or understand it for what it was…

    Good on you OP.

  • trips

  • .asdf

  • No-one has discussed what this was all about-

    Should ozbargain split in two ,
    a Chinese version and an English version , don't suppose you can translate everything back and forth , so a Chinese version as well ?
    before he looses most new users to chinese language copycat sites

  • Has anyone been to the new glen waverly? It's basically full on chinese shopping centre. That, couple with the strip, it's their own territory. English need not be spoken

    • Nothing new about it. Decade ago it is already like that, although some point out it’s getting worse nowadays. Well I never visit it again until now.
      Wonder if the receipt from local market there also in chinese only like some in Chinatown Melb Cbd? I thought businesses have to use English so taxman can examine their business records.

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