Dilemmas of Interviews - Life as an Unemployed NEET

LUnemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 09:27

It has been over 20 years since I last worked, and in that time, I became comfortable with the idea that I did not need a job. This sense of comfort came from a successful software deal I made in my early teens with a large company, securing royalties that have sustained me ever since through quarterly payments.

However, recent disruptions, like the ongoing train strikes, have made me reflect on my ability to contribute more to my community. The unfortunate reality, though, is that the community is often unwelcoming to people like myself.

At this point in my life, I would be content to work as a train driver for a few years at $60k a year. Once the metro system expands across Sydney, I would not mind if I was let go. The issue, though, lies in the broader dilemma I face: the unspoken biases from human resources teams. No matter the job, if you do not fit a certain physical standard, it feels like you are automatically overlooked.

I am not sure if this is appropriate but sometimes it feels like a conspiracy whereby your life is probably just a deterministic set of events. The path is already set for some reason and if you try to deviate to do something else with your life, the gods hit you with some type of mysterious invisible hammer that prevents you from realising your goals. It is difficult to explain unless you have experienced the challenging journey that life has presented to me.

I feel like what I did in the past was a one hit wonder and my luck basically ran out. Over time I have just dropped my achievements from my resume and these days I only apply for a 5-6 jobs per month compared to hundreds I would apply for each month… I think the breaking point was around 10 years ago, when I realised that after 10 years of applying for jobs, it was pointless.

Has anyone else been through anything similar in their life?

It is almost definitely true that there is some bias within the human resources teams. How do you have someone who is relatively talented and put them through all the crap that I have had to deal with?

Honestly, life is alright at the moment. It is just the trains are not running on time and I am not sure I want to buy a car because of the environmental impacts. I am just bored.

Education & Work

Comments

  • Unemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 09:34
    -5

    I am going to put a first comment here just to start off with some ideas.

    I have some issues with why I would not want to be a delivery person or an uber driver because of my appearance. I would likely be bullied and I would likely receive 1 star ratings and then get kicked off the platform because of how I look.

    So what could I do with my life?

    There really is not that much is there?

    We live in a materialistic world where you need to look nice. I do not even know if plastic surgery is an option. I thought about it but seen the risks.

    • Unemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 09:38
      -4

      I am doing some coding for people on some platforms, but essentially I am not getting paid what I think I should be getting. That is the issue here. I feel like I am working with third world wages whilst living in Australia. I am basically doing charity work…

      I want to have a job just like everyone else and not just be some gig-economy coder.

      That has been the worst blow to my confidence across these years.

  • Duckie2hh on 18/02/2025 - 09:35
    +1

    successful software deal I made in my early teens with a large company, securing royalties that have sustained me

    Must be nice….

    I feel like what I did in the past was a one hit wonder and my luck basically ran out.

    I would be happy to settle for one hit at a $100M lottery.

    • Unemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 09:47
      -5

      I am not swimming in cash, but I am comfortable.

      When I spoke to my financial advisor they valued the royalties at a present value of around $15m. I am not sure how they do the calculation, but it is not powerball level riches…

      • Duckie2hh on 18/02/2025 - 09:49
        +11

        Then more than enough to live the rest of your life?

        Instead of working just to fill the time. Why don't you go do some volunteering? Fills the time as well as have a 'feel good' moment. I.e., help out and be a dog walker at the RSPCA, help the local Salvos, etc.

      • freefall101 on 18/02/2025 - 11:45
        +1

        Powerball is regularly under $15m. I'm not sure what you think "swimming in cash" levels of money are, but you're in the top 1% if present value is $15m.

        Anyway, why not start your own WFH consultancy business? Sounds like you have the time and cash.

      • Hardlyworkin on 18/02/2025 - 15:13

        Use that money to either get plastic surgery or seek professional help around how you feel about your appearance…. Or both.
        Alternatively, perhaps be upfront about your appearance if heading in for an interview. Also look at large employers such as government who would hopefully be less narrow minded.

        Whatever the case, do something different than doing the same thins and hoping for a different result.

  • soan papdi on 18/02/2025 - 09:46
    +7

    It is almost definitely true that there is some bias within the human resources teams. How do you have someone who is relatively talented and put them through all the crap that I have had to deal with?

    So you've been jobless for two decades and yet you want companies to hire you now outside of their hiring process? You're being delusional. There has never been a better time to work in software than today. What skills have you learnt over the last couple of years that make you worth hiring?

    • Unemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 09:49
      -3

      I can guarantee you it is not my skills, it is how I look. That is the problem.

      Every time I go to an interview, it is always the glare even if you pass the interview's mini coding exam…

      What can someone like myself actually do?

      • soan papdi on 18/02/2025 - 09:56
        +3

        If you're a whiz at coding but sound arrogant (for example), I would not hire you mostly because it will be a pain long term. Just passing the coding test isn't enough. Interviews are always about selling yourself and being likeable (just like everything else in life).

        If you have the spare cash, look up interview coaches. Do some mock interviews for your role and ask for genuine feedback, including your appearance. If your problem is how you dress, you can hire shoppers who can help you pick out clothes. If it is genuinely your face (I'd bet not), then ask for accomodations when interviewing and most companies will help. The ones that don't are not worth joining. Also try seeing a therapist, you need to be comfortable with who you are regardless of how you look

    • Unemployed NEET on 18/02/2025 - 10:24
      -1

      Yeah, maybe I am delusional. Human resources is not going to change.

      I am looking in the wrong place and I regret many years wasted thinking things would be different. The mindset of my teachers has caused much anguish to persist over these years.

      I look at everyone around me and I envy them. I want to write something but at the same time it is inappropriate for this topic because it is more about social interactions and relationships which are lacking in my life.

      I just needed someone to nudge me in the right direction in relation to my career, because I believe for myself, the wrong mindset is to be looking for a job.

      I should be developing something, building startups, that will be how I continue to contribute to society. I am comfortable with that now.

      I can't believe it took me so long to get this off my chest. So many wasted years…

      • soan papdi on 18/02/2025 - 10:56
        +1

        I look at everyone around me and I envy them.

        Imagine doing something smart enough in your teens and coasting on royalties for 20 years without a job. Most people would envy you. I think you're underestimating your potential.

        I should be developing something, building startups, that will be how I continue to contribute to society. I am comfortable with that now.

        Not everyone is 9-5 material.

        I can't believe it took me so long to get this off my chest. So many wasted years…

        I understand the feeling. We all have regrets and wasted years but you're still young enough (mid-late 30s?), plenty of time to try something new. Good luck to you.

      • LVlahov on 18/02/2025 - 12:57
        -2

        Let me turn this on its head. With your income flows you can afford to invest in a business and HIRE (or partner with - provide an equity share to) a person who can take on the parts of your business that could benefit from a more positive and likeable/relatable front end.

        You could also create an online business.

        Think about the gaps in the market or areas where you could deliver value to people like yourself, help relieve some of the issues people like yourself experience.

        I've had a little bit the same trajectory as yourself - I was once an attractive young fit go getter who founded a successful business while I was young (that is now a national enterprise although I have no relation to the modern business), and have not worked full-time for anybody since leaving that business a decade and a half ago. Instead after a few years off (travelling the world, doing a masters, getting married and having a family) I've been working part-time in my own micro marketing consulting business, but every year distancing myself more and more from customers and working remotely - as I've stacked on the kilos and lost fitness and health, such that if I told people of my past successes today people would look at me and think me a liar. I haven't taken on a new client in 5+ years, not because I did not have the opportunity, but because I do not want the bother and my confidence is low. The handful of clients I've kept over those 5 years keep the bills paid, but don't provide my family and I much more.

        But I can tell you what I'd jump at if I could and had coding skills myself.. just about every news source in Australia is anti-racist and (realistically) pro-immigration, and relays the news through that lens. Sure the Murdoch media empire might pretend to be "chauvinistic" nationalist, or pro-Western, anti-Islam, but with an underlying basis of being pro mass legal immigration (and massively philo-semitic) it cannot really be taken seriously as representing the interests of (Anglo-Celtic i.e. White) Australia.

        There are however lots of good individual creators on social media who take up the cause of defending Western populations from ethnic replacement.

        Is there room for an aggregator platform that could bring that content to a wider audience? Is there room for a specially programmed AI to repurpose such content, and the daily news and re-write it without the pro-immigration, pro-replacement, pro-globalist position of every mainstream media source?

        Our people are deprived by having a lack of good information, leaving them to be (as you will see from reaction to this post) programmed to be sick and self-hating of their own people inside. Could you play a role in building something to properly inform people? That would truly be a heroic deed if you have the skills, and if you can self fund throughout it, you may be in a good position to do it.

        So I think there are two ways to go there.. lean into your reclusive lifestyle and take on tasks others shy away from because they have too much profile to risk, or use your sound financial base to go into any business of your choosing and hire people to be the front end and take on the social tasks you are less suited to.

        Either way I see opportunity for you to get back to being more involved in life. Just reposition yourself from "order taker" to "man taking action".

  • mskeggs on 18/02/2025 - 09:51
    +3

    Is there a reason you don't take the usual approach of identifying a job you would like and building qualifications and experience to get there?
    It sounds like you have decided you will apply for jobs with no official prerequisites then blame your appearance if you are unsuccessful.

    If you are seeking employment with a long history of unemployment you will be rated lower than a keen school leaver, not for your appearance but because a hiring person will be concerned you haven't had work because you aren't a good employee. There was s a bit of an attitude of entitlement coming from your post that implies entry level jobs are beneath you.

    Would you hire someone with years of unemployment who thinks the role is trivial, or a keen school leaver who is excited for the in opportunity?

  • CodeXD on 18/02/2025 - 09:52
    +5

    However, recent disruptions, like the ongoing train strikes, have made me reflect on my ability to contribute more to my community.

    There are other ways to contribute to your community other than 'find a paying job'. You are in a very privilaged situation where you have a constant stream of income without needing to work. Most people are money poor and due to work, also time poor. You don't have the money problem so you are time rich. Have you looked into volunteering your time at the shelter, soup kitchen to help those in need?

  • MS Paint on 18/02/2025 - 10:10
    +8

    if you do not fit a certain physical standard

    If you are overweight, to an unhealthy standard, then focus on improving that aspect of your life before anything else.

  • DingoBilly on 18/02/2025 - 10:46
    +6

    I hire people in my team and can comfortably say if you were very competent we'd hire you over looks. We have many people who are overweight, disfigured from disability, or just generally unattractive (imo) in our department.

    That being said I don't know how I could possibly hire someone who hasn't worked for 20 years. I'd think other companies have the same reservations, and I'd suggest it has little to do with your appearance and everything to do with your skillset and erratic work experience.

  • mbck on 18/02/2025 - 11:12

    use your 15 mil to get surgery so you look better? lol

  • SnowDragon on 18/02/2025 - 11:44
    +1

    TL;DR You have $15m in assets, are bored and want a job to contribute to society again.

    I hope to have your problem one day.

  • ihbh on 18/02/2025 - 11:52

    if you do not fit a certain physical standard, it feels like you are automatically overlooked.

    Can you expand on this a little.

    For example, if you are concerned about your looks, what about a clown/magician for kids' parties or wear a koala suit and collect donations?

    I was going to suggest mentoring others, but you might not have enough life experience; you might have domain expertise so could focus on this.

    If the value of the royalties is ~$15m, the annual payout would be $500+k. With a part of your annual income, you have enough to buy an affordable franchise and work in it and hire others to work along side you to learn people, operational, customer, supplier management, etc. - that is, you can buy yourself an job and see how you like this endeavour.

  • rawm on 18/02/2025 - 12:22

    It has been over 20 years since I last worked
    At this point in my life, I would be content to work as a train driver for a few years at $60k a year

    NEET = Not in Employment, Education, or Training – typically refers to young people, but if you haven’t worked in 20+ years, that makes you at least 35. That’s not young.

    Sounds like you need a spark of inspiration. You’re not broke, so here’s a list:

    • See a careers counsellor and do a 10-month skills self-audit
    • Book a fitness instructor, life coach, GP, and dentist
    • Get a social media influencer to tell you how to live
    • Wander through an art gallery and contemplate your existence
    • Chat with a few business owners about how they stay motivated

    Or just commit to the train driver thing. Worst case, you overshoot a station and get fired or best case, you finally get moving.

    • mapax on 18/02/2025 - 14:21

      I don’t know the memes but aren’t old neets called wizards or something?

  • Ryanek on 18/02/2025 - 12:55
    +2

    sometimes it feels like a conspiracy whereby your life is probably just a deterministic set of events.

    It's not that deep, you're just unqualified.

    I can't imagine a lot of employers are willing to hire someone who hasn't worked in 20 years.

  • plmko on 18/02/2025 - 13:34

    Gosh is this 4chan/Reddit? Ozbargain now has LARPers.

  • dapt on 18/02/2025 - 15:00
    +1

    Not wanting to hire someone who has barely worked for 20 years (and doesn't need to) is not bias, it's business.

    Go seek professional medical help (GP, psych, etc.) and then work out what you want to actually do for a job and plan it out. Start with education (TAFE course, uni course, online course) and go from there.

  • Hard-Yakka on 18/02/2025 - 18:13
    +2

    You mention 'appearance' many many times……so are we talking grossly obese or elephant man or burns victim or what ?
    Well it doesn't really matter, your greatest fail is your attitude…..you seem to be in a world of self imposed failure and the world needs to change to accommodate you.
    Go work for the Salvo's ect and discover what the ass end of life truly is…..coming on here and bitching while counting your 15mill is effing pathetic to be honest. Your life is entirely in your own hands, stop moaning and change yourself cause the world around you certainly won't.

    I've been in the building industry for 50years, I've seen it all…..if you come across as hard working and honest you can join the team anytime, we got lots of rough melons in our ranks so we don't give a shite what you look like ;)

    I wish you well but get your head outa your ass and make the changes YOU need to make….or don't…..the choice is entirely your's alone.

  • lainey13 on 18/02/2025 - 19:48

    So you're not getting hired because you don't have a certain physical standard or because you've got nothing on your resume for the last 20 years? Which one is it?
    With that sort of cash behind you, you could hire people to create something, or give a service/app/whatever away that could be useful.
    Being a wage slave doesn't seem to fulfill your goal of 'contributing to society'.
    Get out there and actually invest your time and effort into helping people. There are many pathways to this and you seem to have looked into none of them.

  • Muppet Detector on 18/02/2025 - 21:21

    What is it about your appearance that you think is affecting your ability to get a job?

    Sure, there may be some occupations where you need to look like a super hero, but that's not a realistic expectation for most people.

    I think you might have a bit of victim mentality "whole world is against me" thing going on. You speak of events that have led to disappointment and set backs, is there a chance you have some underlying trauma or depression thing going on?

    First step may be to seek assistance and advice from your GP.

    Matey, everybody gets smacked down in life. The ones who are successful are the ones who get up one more time than they get smacked down. The only person who can hold you down is you. If you want something bad enough, there is always a way. Instead of being so negative about your prospects, be inspired.

    Best wishes.

  • n3ck3ntry8bort0rgasm on 19/02/2025 - 20:24
    +1

    I don't get ozbargain forum logic.

    usually anyone posting with even a recent created account gets passed off as fake and trolling and broden. and those usually don't have any symbols so people are taking the extra step to find out.

    but this user has a big Learners symbol right there, and everyone is responding as if 100% true??

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