'First Dates Australia'

GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 00:34
Last edited 18/09/2024 - 00:35

Here is something I'd genuinely like some OzBer opinions on. You guys know I'm always asking 'the big questions', and here's another …

On the above-mentioned TV show they set up and film (but don't pay for) a bunch of blind dates, then at the end of the date each couple has to participate in a little interview together. After a cursory preliminary question or two, the interviewer asks both people at the same time (together) whether they would be interested in a second date. Here is where I have noticed a particularly nasty variety of person reveal their true colours. These are the people who absolutely insist that the other person responds first, knowing full well that that other person will respond in the affirmative—then proceed to tell the other person that they are not interested.

Guys and girls both routinely do this on the show. Why do such people not state when prompted, that they are not interested? Why would they desire to have the other person first declare that they are, then 'cut them down' on national TV? Is it some sort of misguided Narcissistic power-play?

Entertainment

Comments

  • CrispyChrispy on 18/09/2024 - 00:40
    +9

    Entertainment

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 00:55

      Is it though?

      Or is it … 'cutting-edge insight into the current psyche of Australian youth'?!?

      ;-P

      On a serious note, I generally like how the Australian versions of USA 'reality' TV shows indicate that Australian 'kids' are more respectful of each other. With regard to my post above though, I've noticed that at least with respect to this particular TV show, the Brit kids are more respectful of each other/they never seem to pull that 'nasty surprise card' during the couples interview.

      • this is us on 18/09/2024 - 05:40
        +1

        You spent time watching and coming here to create this thread.

        People watch reality shows for entertainment or some kind of psychological analysis if you are interested in this sort of thing.

        There is nothing else to gain from that.

        There is no single answer for your questions because people do that for different reasons. Maybe narcissistic, maybe they are just there for the audience, maybe they are just playing the game. Who are those people anyway? If you agree to have your date recorded you are taking all the related risks, and you know that's probably meaningless anyway.

        That makes people like you watch, which gives channel 7 money, so it's all working as expected.

  • morse on 18/09/2024 - 01:52
    +11

    Selection bias. The types of people who choose to go on a show like this aren’t representative of the general population. Also editors pick people who are going to make for interesting viewing. Controversy and discomfort makes more interesting viewing.

    Why those people would do this, if it is in fact genuine (not edited or scripted) - to feel better about themselves. They want to hear they are desirable and the public to hear that. It inflates their ego. They feel like they are the winner and have the upper hand in the power dynamic. Rejecting someone publicly can be a power play. That’s why bullying by exclusion is a thing
    . The bully feels more powerful by excluding one person who would naturally fit in a group otherwise to exert their dominance over that person. The bully gains a sense of superiority, which they are seeking for a variety of reasons, to feel in control, important, more popular or whatever.

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 03:07
      -6

      I have read your post carefully. It makes no allusion to the comparison between the UK and the Australian bersions of the show, so I assume you are commenting 'generally'.

      Re selection bias etc., of course everyone knows that extroverts/attention seekers tend to go on these shows; that is no profound revelation. Your comments about 'controversy and discomfort', and the 'editors … pick' are more interesting though. I wonder how many couples who have a nice but somewhat 'vanilla' experience after being contracted to take part in this show are simply not aired.

      Re 'It inflates their ego. They feel like they are the winner and have the upper hand in the power dynamic.' …

      That is exactly what I have surmised/alluded to above; but ironically, they come across as totally shallow and self-centred people.

      Of course, if anyone on this show does not foresee a 'second date' that is absolutely understandable. The only thing I'm at odds with is the reoccurring trend of (usually very young) people on the show first eliciting an affirmative response from their 'match' re a second date in the final interview, then telling them that they have no interest. That is beyond 'arrogant'; it is simply nasty.

      • morse on 18/09/2024 - 03:22
        +1

        For sure. It’s not nice behaviour and unfortunately any media (TV or otherwise) that shows this kind of behaviour to an extent normalises it. But nothing is without social commentary and most people watching will see it for what it is and not replicate it. I think sometimes viewers enjoy seeing other people’s poor or embarrassing behaviour, as it makes them think “well at least I’m not as shitty as that person”. That’s why most reality TV shows have a villain as people need someone or something to dislike.

      • this is us on 18/09/2024 - 05:50
        +3

        You might have to consider that some people might struggle to say that they are not interested (to avoid hurting someone else's feelings). Therefore, they want the other person to say that they are not interested first so that they can just agree… If the other person says that they are interested, then they will have to say that they are not interested anyway. Just add that to multiple other possibilities to justify human behaviour.

        • morse on 18/09/2024 - 06:52

          Yeah that’s possible too

        • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:48
          -1

          That is right TIU, and perhaps my post was not entirely clear in this regard. When I said 'knowing full well that that other person will respond in the affirmative', I meant 'knowing full well that the other person wants a second date' … I didn't mean that they know they will jump at the chance to go first. You make a good point though. I suppose my basic point is that if you know you don't want a second date and you know the other person does, the nice thing to do would be to let the other person down first. Some people are evidently just not nice.

  • try2bhelpful on 18/09/2024 - 02:10
    +12

    Why would anyone but a narcissist appear on these “reality” TV programs?

    The whole thing is scripted and edited for “drama”.

    • Shoocat on 18/09/2024 - 10:47
      +1

      This - they do these things in most cases because they are coached to generate drama. Selective editing is also used a lot to fake drama where there isn't any.

      The producers of these shoes know that people being civil to each other doesn't make for good TV.

      Take everything you see with a massive grain of salt.

  • AustriaBargain on 18/09/2024 - 02:23
    +3

    Because if you say you want them and they say they don't want you, then you "lose" the game. And it is a gameshow, really. That's the whole point, did you buy a TV for the first time in your life recently, is this all new to you?

      • DingoBilly on 18/09/2024 - 09:07
        +2

        ? It's the literal answer though. Not everything needs to be a pages long answer.

        • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:55
          -4

          '? It's the literal answer though.'

          No, it does not address the question I asked at all, which was quite specific. The question I asked was about people who force the other person to respond first, knowing that that other person wants a second date, then themselves state that they don't want one. Mean behaviour. See how that has nothing to do with A-Barg's response above?

          Many people seem to have misinterpreted my original question though, so I think I did not word it clearly enough.

  • holdenmg on 18/09/2024 - 05:24
    +3

    What low life "race to the bottom" network would produce/air such trash?

    Oh yeah, Channel 7.

    • Nillionaire on 18/09/2024 - 09:06
      +1

      Because the other networks don't have similar shows? 😂

  • EightImmortals on 18/09/2024 - 06:04
    +2

    Are you not entertained!?

  • pegaxs on 18/09/2024 - 08:01
    +3

    Because they are actors… on a tv show… made up to get views… so people talk about it with other people… so the brain dead consumers who believe this shit do all their marketing and advertising for them by posting mindless threads on chat forums about it…

    “Reality tv” is one of the biggest driving forces that stopped me watching free to air TV. Ads and reality tv. It’s just mindless dross.

    • DashCam AKA Rolts on 18/09/2024 - 09:11
      +4

      I'd watch a reality show based on "Uncle Ian's Garage" or "Salim's Sik Sledde Shop" any day. It'd be better than "Kingdig Customs" and have more drama than "Wheeler Dealers".

      • MS Paint on 18/09/2024 - 10:22
        +1

        Until Uncle Ian gets his own YouTube channel I try to support him by buying this stuff.

        He's a miserable sod and doesn't want no stinky cats and dogs hanging around his garage.

        Legend has it that Ian carries a bag of this when he visits Bunnings to avoid confrontation with Karen's and her dogs shit infested nether regions.

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:58
      -1

      The suggestion that they are actors is laughable.

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:30

      'Because they are actors…'

      See this link:

      https://go.mycastingnet.com/Apply/Show/FirstDates2023

      So your claim is that this link is but a ruse, and that all applications received from the public are simply ignored, and instead they prefer to pay actors and script writers and do multiple takes to generate the show? That makes no sense.

      OR alternatively, perhaps your view is that all applicants are asked one initial question; 'are you an actor/actress?' … and if they are not, they are hastily rejected?

  • coffeeinmyveins on 18/09/2024 - 08:19
    +3

    There's nothing real about reality TV.

    It's all scripted. There's no genuine interactions. They're all actors and there are dozens of takes where they are told what to say.

    Don't watch it thinking this is how people naturally react, because it's not.

    I'm pretty sure the only exception to this was big brother back in the day, but even then there was "nudging"

  • netjock on 18/09/2024 - 08:36
    -5

    It is Australia. The put down country. You know why key technologies like WiFi, Solar and tech are going overseas. People here are either dismissive or keep on putting people down.

    Digging stuff out of the ground, farming, building and bad quality teaching seems to work. Stuff in the ground is basically free except you just need to put costs to extract it. Farming, well it rains and the sun shines so it is almost free. Building - lots of land and high schoolers (some of them are just stuck with a year 10 mental maturity) have you by the balls if you want a roof over your head. Education - riding on the free reputation of the country but the real quality is like… meh.

  • stickingly on 18/09/2024 - 08:38
    +1

    To your specific question, I think people don't want to be seen to be embarrassed and vulnerable on TV, which would happen if they say yes first and then the other person says no.

    It seems a lot of people just take the soft option - they say yes, and then reject the person afterward (as shown in the update they give at the end, when a lot of the people who said yes never end up going on the second date, or one ghosts the other)

    What about the bit where they have to decide who pays - is that real?

    Having said that I think a lot of it is fake and scripted and most people who go on the show are more about self-promotion than actually finding a partner

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:18

      'To your specific question, …'

      You did not actually provide any comment on my specific question.

  • 87percent on 18/09/2024 - 08:45
    +12

    2 questions

    1. Why are you watching “First Date Australia”?
    2. Why are you analysing “First Date Australia”?
    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:22

      Same answer to both questions. For shits and giggles.

      Admittedly I wouldn't be able to just watch it and do nothing else because I'd get bored after about a minute, but I tend to have 'whatever' on the TV on in the background while working, or doing house-work, or gaming with the kids, etc.

    • CrowReally on 18/09/2024 - 20:15

      If you click on their profile and read a few of their posts you'll find out the disappointing answer.

      (I don't advocate reading several of their essays on the quality of free-to-air TV shows in a single sitting, I'm just pointing out where they are).

  • jv on 18/09/2024 - 09:35

    You know they are all paid actors right???

    • Protractor on 18/09/2024 - 09:38
      +1

      Up until now I thought they must be paying the audience to watch such sputum.

  • Protractor on 18/09/2024 - 09:36
    +4

    You actually watch that shit? And then spend energy analysing it?

    COAB

  • Ryanek on 18/09/2024 - 09:50
    +2

    I started writing a well thought out reply analysing your question and providing possible reasons, but then I realised… I should really get back to work.

  • overthinking on 18/09/2024 - 10:46

    stop it, get some help

  • Nidzdotnet on 18/09/2024 - 11:17
    +1

    I'ts just this generation. You notice the older people who appear on the whole seem less picky and demanding. The young players seem to just be there because their arm long pre-requesite list can't be fulfilled in real life. As others have said, it's more than likely semi-scripted as well. Also as hot as they appear, there's always some kind of trade-off or catch like they are socially awkward or not very inteligent. That also makes for good TV. People love to play voyer and watch this car crash TV.

  • pharkurnell on 18/09/2024 - 12:09

    People still fall for the "REALITY TV" shit?

    The only thing real about it is its Real garbage

  • bp2000 on 18/09/2024 - 21:07

    Never watched the show. Could it just because they are hoping the other person says they are not interested so they don't feel bad about the rejection?

  • cloudbox on 18/09/2024 - 22:14

    People watch free to air TV?

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