'First Dates Australia'

GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 00:34
Last edited 18/09/2024 - 00:35

Here is something I'd genuinely like some OzBer opinions on. You guys know I'm always asking 'the big questions', and here's another …

On the above-mentioned TV show they set up and film (but don't pay for) a bunch of blind dates, then at the end of the date each couple has to participate in a little interview together. After a cursory preliminary question or two, the interviewer asks both people at the same time (together) whether they would be interested in a second date. Here is where I have noticed a particularly nasty variety of person reveal their true colours. These are the people who absolutely insist that the other person responds first, knowing full well that that other person will respond in the affirmative—then proceed to tell the other person that they are not interested.

Guys and girls both routinely do this on the show. Why do such people not state when prompted, that they are not interested? Why would they desire to have the other person first declare that they are, then 'cut them down' on national TV? Is it some sort of misguided Narcissistic power-play?

Entertainment

Comments

  • CrispyChrispy on 18/09/2024 - 00:40
    +16

    Entertainment

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 00:55

      Is it though?

      Or is it … 'cutting-edge insight into the current psyche of Australian youth'?!?

      ;-P

      On a serious note, I generally like how the Australian versions of USA 'reality' TV shows indicate that Australian 'kids' are more respectful of each other. With regard to my post above though, I've noticed that at least with respect to this particular TV show, the Brit kids are more respectful of each other/they never seem to pull that 'nasty surprise card' during the couples interview.

      • this is us on 18/09/2024 - 05:40
        +2

        You spent time watching and coming here to create this thread.

        People watch reality shows for entertainment or some kind of psychological analysis if you are interested in this sort of thing.

        There is nothing else to gain from that.

        There is no single answer for your questions because people do that for different reasons. Maybe narcissistic, maybe they are just there for the audience, maybe they are just playing the game. Who are those people anyway? If you agree to have your date recorded you are taking all the related risks, and you know that's probably meaningless anyway.

        That makes people like you watch, which gives channel 7 money, so it's all working as expected.

  • morse on 18/09/2024 - 01:52
    +18

    Selection bias. The types of people who choose to go on a show like this aren’t representative of the general population. Also editors pick people who are going to make for interesting viewing. Controversy and discomfort makes more interesting viewing.

    Why those people would do this, if it is in fact genuine (not edited or scripted) - to feel better about themselves. They want to hear they are desirable and the public to hear that. It inflates their ego. They feel like they are the winner and have the upper hand in the power dynamic. Rejecting someone publicly can be a power play. That’s why bullying by exclusion is a thing
    . The bully feels more powerful by excluding one person who would naturally fit in a group otherwise to exert their dominance over that person. The bully gains a sense of superiority, which they are seeking for a variety of reasons, to feel in control, important, more popular or whatever.

      • morse on 18/09/2024 - 03:22
        +2

        For sure. It’s not nice behaviour and unfortunately any media (TV or otherwise) that shows this kind of behaviour to an extent normalises it. But nothing is without social commentary and most people watching will see it for what it is and not replicate it. I think sometimes viewers enjoy seeing other people’s poor or embarrassing behaviour, as it makes them think “well at least I’m not as shitty as that person”. That’s why most reality TV shows have a villain as people need someone or something to dislike.

      • this is us on 18/09/2024 - 05:50
        +3

        You might have to consider that some people might struggle to say that they are not interested (to avoid hurting someone else's feelings). Therefore, they want the other person to say that they are not interested first so that they can just agree… If the other person says that they are interested, then they will have to say that they are not interested anyway. Just add that to multiple other possibilities to justify human behaviour.

        • morse on 18/09/2024 - 06:52

          Yeah that’s possible too

        • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:48
          -2

          That is right TIU, and perhaps my post was not entirely clear in this regard. When I said 'knowing full well that that other person will respond in the affirmative', I meant 'knowing full well that the other person wants a second date' … I didn't mean that they know they will jump at the chance to go first. You make a good point though. I suppose my basic point is that if you know you don't want a second date and you know the other person does, the nice thing to do would be to let the other person down first. Some people are evidently just not nice.

  • try2bhelpful on 18/09/2024 - 02:10
    +16

    Why would anyone but a narcissist appear on these “reality” TV programs?

    The whole thing is scripted and edited for “drama”.

    • Shoocat on 18/09/2024 - 10:47
      +1

      This - they do these things in most cases because they are coached to generate drama. Selective editing is also used a lot to fake drama where there isn't any.

      The producers of these shoes know that people being civil to each other doesn't make for good TV.

      Take everything you see with a massive grain of salt.

  • AustriaBargain on 18/09/2024 - 02:23
    +4

    Because if you say you want them and they say they don't want you, then you "lose" the game. And it is a gameshow, really. That's the whole point, did you buy a TV for the first time in your life recently, is this all new to you?

      • DingoBilly on 18/09/2024 - 09:07
        +3

        ? It's the literal answer though. Not everything needs to be a pages long answer.

        • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:55
          -7

          '? It's the literal answer though.'

          No, it does not address the question I asked at all, which was quite specific. The question I asked was about people who force the other person to respond first, knowing that that other person wants a second date, then themselves state that they don't want one. Mean behaviour. See how that has nothing to do with A-Barg's response above?

          Many people seem to have misinterpreted my original question though, so I think I did not word it clearly enough.

  • holdenmg on 18/09/2024 - 05:24
    +6

    What low life "race to the bottom" network would produce/air such trash?

    Oh yeah, Channel 7.

    • Nillionaire on 18/09/2024 - 09:06

      Because the other networks don't have similar shows? 😂

  • EightImmortals on 18/09/2024 - 06:04
    +3

    Are you not entertained!?

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:27
      +1

      I am unashamedly entertained.

  • pegaxs on 18/09/2024 - 08:01
    +6

    Because they are actors… on a tv show… made up to get views… so people talk about it with other people… so the brain dead consumers who believe this shit do all their marketing and advertising for them by posting mindless threads on chat forums about it…

    “Reality tv” is one of the biggest driving forces that stopped me watching free to air TV. Ads and reality tv. It’s just mindless dross.

    • DashCam AKA Rolts on 18/09/2024 - 09:11
      +4

      I'd watch a reality show based on "Uncle Ian's Garage" or "Salim's Sik Sledde Shop" any day. It'd be better than "Kingdig Customs" and have more drama than "Wheeler Dealers".

      • MS Paint on 18/09/2024 - 10:22
        +1

        Until Uncle Ian gets his own YouTube channel I try to support him by buying this stuff.

        He's a miserable sod and doesn't want no stinky cats and dogs hanging around his garage.

        Legend has it that Ian carries a bag of this when he visits Bunnings to avoid confrontation with Karen's and her dogs shit infested nether regions.

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 15:58
      -2

      The suggestion that they are actors is laughable.

      • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 22:31
        -2

        There is a very easy way to determine whether 'they are actors', as Pegasus claims. We simply open up the following question to OzBers:

        'Not including the few actual/well-know actors who have been on the show and declared from the outset that they have acted in the past (the odd old soapie star, etc.), can any OzBer point to even one participant/"dater" that they have ever seen acting in anything?

        • quick-dry on 18/09/2024 - 23:30
          +3

          not actors per se, but there are plenty of reality star hopefuls who use it as a screen test to parlay into bigger things.

          Lots of dates get filmed but not used.

          On the UK version, a few who went on to other shows that spring to mind were Cara DelaHoyde (Love Island Season 2), and Jess Impiazzi (Ex On The Beach UK as Rogan's Ex).

          In Australia, we had Divina from MAFS (she was the one who cheated with Dean iirc, the big guy who skateboarded). Dee Nyugen had a date with Taite Radley - Dee went on to make that an appearance in Geordie Shore and from there onto The Challenge, while Taite 'won' Bachelorette Australia with Ali Oetjen.

          I know someone who went down and had a date but it wasn't shown, they also tried with Below Deck, and some other reality shows.

          Not sure whether my barber was just there on the Aus version for a bit of fun, or to get on to other shows.

          • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 02:28
            -2

            @quick-dry:

            'not actors …'

            Thank you. That suggestion was ridiculous and demonstrably false from the outset.

            'Lots of dates get filmed but not used.'

            Of course that would happen. I'd estimate that they only air < 20% of the dates. This is where the concept of 'selection bias' that someone mentioned above would be much more likely to influence what we see.

            Re all those who went on to 'become' whatever, that is not relevant to what they were when they actually went on the dating show; except to the extent that they are obviously extraverts. That is no surprise though … I'd imagine that 95% of peeps who go on any 'reality' TV show are 'extraverts'.

        • aliceisstupid on 19/09/2024 - 06:38
          +1

          My partner is in the industry and he recognises them (as actors he has worked with). Doesn’t mean the public aren’t on it too but they dont have enough and bulk it out with paid actors

          • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 15:48
            -3

            @aliceisstupid: Why, then, wouldn't anyone else (i.e. thousands of viewers) 'recognise them as actors', thus exposing the show as a fictional contrivance? Why would only your partner be able to recognise them? The suggestion that the peeps on this show are actors makes no logical sense.

            • quick-dry on 19/09/2024 - 22:56

              @GnarlyKnuckles: theatre people? actors who do 'bit parts'? all those people that booking agencies send out for 'non memorable man at cafe scene 4', 'waiter with half empty jug #7"?

              might also mean poeple who do a lot of 'extras' work?

              reality tv taps into the "I want to be a celebrity/influencer" more than 'actor'. But there is a pretty big crossover of those in the low levels.

              • aliceisstupid on 20/09/2024 - 07:40
                +1

                @quick-dry: Yeh it’s this. The actual laughable suggestion is old mate thinking actors at this level are recognisable lol

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:30
      -2

      'Because they are actors…'

      See this link:

      https://go.mycastingnet.com/Apply/Show/FirstDates2023

      So your claim is that this link is but a ruse, and that all applications received from the public are simply ignored, and instead they prefer to pay actors and script writers and do multiple takes to generate the show? That makes no sense.

      OR alternatively, perhaps your view is that all applicants are asked one initial question; 'are you an actor/actress?' … and if they are not, they are hastily rejected?

      • greatlamp on 19/09/2024 - 12:33
        +1

        They don't all have to be actors to create the controversy you enjoy.

        Aspiring actors seek out these kind of shows to make a name for themselves and become social media famous. They may not declare that they are actors but their behaviour is still fake.

        • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 16:44
          -2

          I contend that none of them are 'actors', except the very few (one or two) who openly state that they are, on the show. So far no one here as identified even a single one that proves this wrong. 'Aspiring actors' are not actors; they are merely extraverts who have thus far failed to achieve their aspirations. The fact that a few of them crop up on other 'reality' shows is not at all surprising.

          On a more philosophical note, the late great Will Shake once said:

          'All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players.'

          I suppose to the extent that that is true, everyone on the show is an 'actor'; as is everyone here on this website … and every human who has ever walked the Earth …

          • greatlamp on 20/09/2024 - 07:51

            @GnarlyKnuckles:

            Aspiring actors' are not actors; they are merely extraverts who have thus far failed to achieve their aspirations.

            My point isn't whether or not the show hires actors. I agree they with your reasoning that they wouldn't.

            Your original question was about human behaviour. The question is whether the behaviour of participants on the show is real. If there are 'extraverts' on the show intentionally acting in an exaggerated way to get noticed - the show is at least partially fake.

            Shakespeare's quote isn't relevant to this situation - they aren't attempting to conform to social expectations they are in fact doing the opposite, intentionally, and only because they might get on TV.

  • coffeeinmyveins on 18/09/2024 - 08:19
    +2

    There's nothing real about reality TV.

    It's all scripted. There's no genuine interactions. They're all actors and there are dozens of takes where they are told what to say.

    Don't watch it thinking this is how people naturally react, because it's not.

    I'm pretty sure the only exception to this was big brother back in the day, but even then there was "nudging"

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 20/09/2024 - 02:23

      'Don't watch it thinking this is how people naturally react, because it's not.'

      I have experienced, in 'real life', hundreds of people behaving exactly like the peeps on this TV show behave. Have you ever actually watched the show in question C-in-my-V? Watch 10 minutes of it, then reassess your assertion that "they're all actors" (despite the fact that no one here has ever seen any of them acting in anything, ever … lol).

      • coffeeinmyveins on 20/09/2024 - 11:19

        then reassess your assertion that "they're all actors"

        They are all playing a part mate. There's nothing real about reality TV and just because some of the personality traits that are exhibited on these shows match reality, it doesn't mean the entirety of it is.

        I think you need to reassess how much stock you put in trusting that these shows are anything but scripted garbage.

  • netjock on 18/09/2024 - 08:36
    -7

    It is Australia. The put down country. You know why key technologies like WiFi, Solar and tech are going overseas. People here are either dismissive or keep on putting people down.

    Digging stuff out of the ground, farming, building and bad quality teaching seems to work. Stuff in the ground is basically free except you just need to put costs to extract it. Farming, well it rains and the sun shines so it is almost free. Building - lots of land and high schoolers (some of them are just stuck with a year 10 mental maturity) have you by the balls if you want a roof over your head. Education - riding on the free reputation of the country but the real quality is like… meh.

  • stickingly on 18/09/2024 - 08:38
    +1

    To your specific question, I think people don't want to be seen to be embarrassed and vulnerable on TV, which would happen if they say yes first and then the other person says no.

    It seems a lot of people just take the soft option - they say yes, and then reject the person afterward (as shown in the update they give at the end, when a lot of the people who said yes never end up going on the second date, or one ghosts the other)

    What about the bit where they have to decide who pays - is that real?

    Having said that I think a lot of it is fake and scripted and most people who go on the show are more about self-promotion than actually finding a partner

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:18
      -1

      'To your specific question, …'

      You did not actually provide any comment on my specific question.

  • 87percent on 18/09/2024 - 08:45
    +16

    2 questions

    1. Why are you watching “First Date Australia”?
    2. Why are you analysing “First Date Australia”?
    • GnarlyKnuckles on 18/09/2024 - 18:22
      -2

      Same answer to both questions. For shits and giggles.

      Admittedly I wouldn't be able to just watch it and do nothing else because I'd get bored after about a minute, but I tend to have 'whatever' on the TV on in the background while working, or doing house-work, or gaming with the kids, etc.

    • Crow K on 18/09/2024 - 20:15
      -1

      If you click on their profile and read a few of their posts you'll find out the disappointing answer.

      (I don't advocate reading several of their essays on the quality of free-to-air TV shows in a single sitting, I'm just pointing out where they are).

  • jv on 18/09/2024 - 09:35
    -1

    You know they are all paid actors right???

    • Protractor on 18/09/2024 - 09:38
      +2

      Up until now I thought they must be paying the audience to watch such sputum.

  • Protractor on 18/09/2024 - 09:36
    +4

    You actually watch that shit? And then spend energy analysing it?

    COAB

  • Ryanek on 18/09/2024 - 09:50
    +3

    I started writing a well thought out reply analysing your question and providing possible reasons, but then I realised… I should really get back to work.

  • overthinking on 18/09/2024 - 10:46
    +1

    stop it, get some help

  • Nidzdotnet on 18/09/2024 - 11:17
    +1

    I'ts just this generation. You notice the older people who appear on the whole seem less picky and demanding. The young players seem to just be there because their arm long pre-requesite list can't be fulfilled in real life. As others have said, it's more than likely semi-scripted as well. Also as hot as they appear, there's always some kind of trade-off or catch like they are socially awkward or not very inteligent. That also makes for good TV. People love to play voyer and watch this car crash TV.

  • pharkurnell on 18/09/2024 - 12:09
    +2

    People still fall for the "REALITY TV" shit?

    The only thing real about it is its Real garbage

  • bp2000 on 18/09/2024 - 21:07

    Never watched the show. Could it just because they are hoping the other person says they are not interested so they don't feel bad about the rejection?

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 02:57
      -5

      Note this phrase in my original post, which almost everyone seems to have not read, or failed to interpret correctly:

      '… knowing full well that that other person will respond in the affirmative'

      I have learned from this post. I need to phrase the questions I pose here more simply, and if the question is a bit complex and thus can not be phrased very simply, I need to post it elsewhere. It is a bit boring posting a question then having > 90% of respondents reply with something that does not relate to that question at all.

      I love all the negs by the way … they spur me on.

      Anyways, I found the most informative/insightful response above to be that provided by 'quick-dry' … they pointed out that some have evidently used it as a stepping stone into other 'reality' TV shows. This leads me to believe that in a sense, these particular peeps were 'acting' when they went on the show, in a sense (or 'playing a role?)—though not in the capacity of a paid/scripted actor. So maybe some of these peeps are deliberately nasty, in an effort to 'set up' a subsequent career in 'reality' TV as a bastard/bitch.

      • bp2000 on 24/09/2024 - 11:14

        Feel that is up to interpretation. Like how do you know they knew their date woudld respond in the affirmative. Like even 1% chance they might respond negatively and let them off the hook may be worth the shot for them.

        Give me a time stamp on a show available on streaming and I'll judge for myself.

  • cloudbox on 18/09/2024 - 22:14
    +2

    People watch free to air TV?

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 03:00
      +1

      The operative word there is 'free'.

      You will find that a lot of peeps here on this website called 'OzBargain' watch free to air TV.

      • morse on 19/09/2024 - 04:49
        +1

        But don’t most people just stream iview and SBS on demand if they are really not doing any paid streaming subscriptions? Also Kanopy free from library for movies. Then I think most OzBargainers cycle free trials or share accounts for other subscriptions so it’s low cost.

        Whenever there is something I specifically want to watch on 7, 9, 10 I just can’t cope with the number and length of the ads, so basically don’t watch them at all anymore.

        There is much better free content available than this show.

  • OzzyOzbourne on 18/09/2024 - 22:46

    I don't watch that carp

    • GnarlyKnuckles on 19/09/2024 - 02:33
      +1

      Conversely, I find gazing at goldfish quite relaxing. Each to their own I guess.

  • ratman on 19/09/2024 - 08:22

    I know people who work on many reality tv shows. They're not reality, the contestents are told how to act and guided on what to say and how to deliver it. They ask them do this for drama and entertainment.

    • H3R34TH4C0MM3NTS on 19/09/2024 - 10:05

      The shock and horror that these "Reality shows" are

      1.Casted ie roles are put up for audition
      2.Scripted ie people are directed what to say and how to act.

      Sounds like a piece of fictional work to me

      would this make home and away a "Reality show" too

      • OzBarAnon on 19/09/2024 - 13:54

        No, because Home and Away is not ostensibly real. I don't know too much about these types of dating shows as opposed to competition ones (I'm pretty sure there are laws regarding how they are regulated and operated because of prize distribution), but they at least keep up the facade of being real and sincere interactions, whereas straight fictional TV is honest about it.

  • cashless on 19/09/2024 - 09:12

    you wanna watch what you watch

  • Ryxxi on 19/09/2024 - 15:16

    common bro its a Tv show.. its not real. Theres money and fame involved..

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