If You Had The Magical Power to Shoplift Anything from Any Supermarket and You Always Get Away with It, Would You Do It?

AustriaBargain on 09/05/2024 - 03:26

Let's say you have to use everything in your own house so you can't sell stuff to make money. Would you just walk into Coles or IGA or Costco and load up your cart full of stuff and just walk out, if you knew you could get away with it 100% of the time with zero legal, moral, societal, or any kind of repercussions other than living with your own conscience. So you're still stealing, you're harming their bottom line or causing them to pay more insurance. The magic makes it so no one else ever know the stuff was stolen.

Or would you just do it to big billion dollar chains and never to independent places or co-ops or whatever.

Food & Grocery

Comments

  • elgrande on 09/05/2024 - 03:29
    +7

    Now I know why you had to open Christmas presents early..

  • MS Paint on 09/05/2024 - 03:31
    +63

    Woke up to let the dogs out, checked ozbargain, saw this, felt confused, going back to sleep now thinking WTF did I just read?

    • payless69 on 09/05/2024 - 07:00
      +3

      I read ozbargain and then the dogs refused to go out!

    • Jimothy Wongingtons on 09/05/2024 - 07:58
      +16

      Wait… WHOOOOOO LET THE DOGS OUT????

      • Nugs on 09/05/2024 - 11:02
        +10

        Who, who, who, who, who?
        .

        • Kangal on 10/05/2024 - 05:39
          +2

          Wannapeepodonjungae Yippiaeyo

  • holdenmg on 09/05/2024 - 05:19
    +18

    I dunno.

    A bit like reading posts that have no meaning…

    I feel like I want the time back, but I'm told it doesn't work like that.

    Go study Applied or Moral Philosophy and get back to us,

    • Crow K on 09/05/2024 - 09:45
      +10

      I agreed with everything you said right up until the last five words

      • holdenmg on 09/05/2024 - 12:05
        +3

        I'm only nice to one person a day… lol

    • Jabba the Hutt on 12/05/2024 - 09:08
      +1

      It's a textbook trolley problem question. Philosophers have been pondering it ever since the advent of the supermarket.

    • 0806449 on 12/05/2024 - 12:40

      This post is a breath of fresh air if you read the comments in the paper shredder post

  • Forfiet on 09/05/2024 - 05:53
    +4

    I too was reading a light novel this morning…..

  • EightImmortals on 09/05/2024 - 06:03
    +10

    Is this a veiled comment about the U.S. right now?

  • mapax on 09/05/2024 - 06:21
    +9

    Drugsarebad.jpeg

  • morse on 09/05/2024 - 06:38
    +19

    I’m disappointed this magical stealing power doesn’t include delivery. Still have to go and fill my cart? Nah…

  • joka on 09/05/2024 - 07:04
    +1

    Am I the only one with this power or doesn’t everyone else posses the same power?

    If it’s only me, then yes. If it’s everyone then i think the business will cease to exist.

  • pegaxs on 09/05/2024 - 07:13
    +2

    Yep, absolutely, and I would use that power to empty out Coles and Woolworths and use the food I stole to feed the homeless and the needy.

    • tomfool on 12/05/2024 - 16:16
      -1

      And make the 310K people that work for woolies and coles homeless to? How do you plug the gap in gov revenue of around 800 milion from 2 big chains? Then is Aldi next?

  • cashless on 09/05/2024 - 07:38
    +11

    That makes no sense. Cheers

    • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:08
      +1

      Well, OP wants Coles to be making no cents.

  • SmiTTy on 09/05/2024 - 07:45
    +1

    If I had to, I would goto coles/woolworths (no need to steal in bulk at costco)… But I would also try to use my power for good and not just evil, by stealing for the homeless too ;)

    If I didn't have to (ie I could still choose to pay) then I would. But it sure would be tempting

    • AustriaBargain on 09/05/2024 - 07:49
      -5

      You'd have to host the homeless in your home to feed them though.

      • S2 on 10/05/2024 - 09:30
        +8

        I find it unfair for people to come into your hypothetical question and neg you for clarifying the requirements that you're making up.

  • MrThing on 09/05/2024 - 07:47
    +2

    eneloops or baby formula

  • BoltThrower on 09/05/2024 - 08:04
    +1

    Any supermarket on Earth or the universe?

    • AustriaBargain on 09/05/2024 - 08:07
      -1

      Anywhere in the universe for the rest of your natural life.

      • 900dollaridoos on 10/05/2024 - 11:15

        I would sell my extremely niche magic power to DARPA to quickly identify any existing civilizations in the universe that have developed enough to have supermarkets.

        • AustriaBargain on 10/05/2024 - 11:17
          +1

          Revealing your power to the world and offering yourself to science is noble. US military science less noble, but admirable you trust our allies enough to do that.

        • mrdean on 10/05/2024 - 11:43

          Lol. DARPA already knows…..

  • Sal in SA on 09/05/2024 - 08:06
    +5

    So basically make everyone else pay for what you steal..

    • AustriaBargain on 09/05/2024 - 08:07
      -2

      Getting something you didn't pay for is the gist of shoplifting, yes.

      • Sal in SA on 09/05/2024 - 13:54

        Yes, point being others have to cover that cost.

        • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:10

          Moral dilemma: hi, everybody.

        • zzymurgy on 12/05/2024 - 15:52

          You could say that about literally everything on this website

  • 2jzzzz on 09/05/2024 - 08:14
    +3

    I think this is how a lot of America and a fair few in Australia actually feel

  • JIMB0 on 09/05/2024 - 08:19
    +4

    Must have been pay day yesterday. OP needs to lay off the heavy stuff.

  • YodaBaby on 09/05/2024 - 08:38
    +4

    Hey go easy on the weed

  • brendanm on 09/05/2024 - 08:40
    +3

    Sounds like California, except there you are allowed to sell the stolen goods so you can buy crack or fentanyl.

    • iDroid on 09/05/2024 - 21:48

      Only crack or fentanyl?

      • brendanm on 09/05/2024 - 21:55

        I suppose you could use the proceeds to buy whatever drugs you liked?

        • OZKap on 10/05/2024 - 06:09

          Only drugs?

  • Fergy1987 on 09/05/2024 - 08:59
    +3

    News headline

    "Thief tries to justify his kleptomania on Australian bargain website"

  • DingoBilly on 09/05/2024 - 09:01
    -5

    Lol why would I feel bad?

    Coles/Woolworths loses $100-$200 a week because of me? They throw out more stock every day that's expired/broken etc.

    Bizarre question.

    • Crow K on 09/05/2024 - 09:43
      -1

      (Because it's a giant corporation) Shoplifting is a victimless crime, like punching someone in the dark

      • ratman on 11/05/2024 - 08:06
        +1

        Lol +1 for one of my all time favourite Simpsons quotes

  • Sye on 09/05/2024 - 09:20

    Someone has been shoplifting the Magic Mushrooms

    • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:12

      ALDI special deals getting quite exotic.

  • ozbs25 on 09/05/2024 - 09:41
    +4

    No.

  • GordonD on 09/05/2024 - 09:44

    Civil disorder occurs when people have a big enough perceived grievance, something brings the issue to a head, and they are in a situation where they have the numbers that mean they think they can get away with it.

    You can read what their grievance is by who/what they direct their anger at.

    Sometimes they riot, and smash things up. That says their grievance is that they have no power.

    Sometimes they loot the shops and the banks. Which says their grievance is that they are being exploited by the group that has economic power.

    And sometimes they attack police vehicles. Which says their grievance is that they as a group are being picked on for their race, religion or whatever.

    It is interesting that someone would talk about what is essentially looting the supermarkets. Have the people who have been pushing the idea that the supermarkets are price gouging been that successful that people actually believe it, despite the evidence that there is nothing disproportionate about their prices, profits or profit margins?

      • GordonD on 09/05/2024 - 09:54

        I think we all have fantasies of looting shops.

        Yes, its sad there's so many people like that around who convince themselves that its OK for them to have these anti-social urges, to lie and cheat and steal and do cruel things to small helpless animals, and act on them when they get the opportunity, because they believe everyone else has them too.

        • Sinnerator on 09/05/2024 - 10:04
          +2

          but the rich (and their minions) do that all the time

        • fantombloo on 09/05/2024 - 10:08
          -2

          do cruel things to small helpless animals

          You're vegan?

        • ratman on 11/05/2024 - 08:14

          Those things aren't remotely comparable.

          Someone not giving a shit that Woolworths CEO has buy a slightly smaller tropical island than they would have liked with this year's bonus versus being a psychopath and torturing animals

      • Randolph Duke on 10/05/2024 - 10:16
        +1

        My fantasy is that I'm rich enough that I don't need to steal.

  • Montyjpm on 09/05/2024 - 09:50
    -3

    If I have this magic power then I would give the loots to low income folks and not hogged it.

  • Jimothy Wongingtons on 09/05/2024 - 09:51
    +4

    magic

    You had 3 genie wishes…and you used it on this????

    • Crow K on 09/05/2024 - 10:18
      +5

      Come on, you've seen AustriaBargain's posts and comments before. I'm frankly surprised they didn't wish to be head of a Department to Count the Moon or "spoons would only work if you held them in your left hand".

  • Cheaplikethebird on 09/05/2024 - 09:59
    +1

    1000000%. We're all in competition, I'd like to pretend we're not but the top end of town who hold all the money and power DO treat society like that so you're a chump if you don't. Co-ops would be no-go but it's free rein on corporations.

    In the immortal words of Wu-Tang, protect your goddamn neck.

  • Darayus on 09/05/2024 - 10:32

    Are you financially strained that you cannot afford food on the table or a compulsive shoplifter who loves to pick things up and doesn't pay? Finally, the items you picked up and were not paid for will be recovered by an increase in their charges on other items we all pay.

    Also, one of my good friends owns the local Sydney IGA and amongst the competition from C&WW, he has to face the problem of people taking away food and items from the aisle. He has recordings of all the people taking them away but finally, he just ignores them because he feels that this person may have some genuine financial issues which force them to take food home and in case he Nic pic them they will feel insulted or they will not be able to feed them. You will be surprised that the aged lady does this and hence his decision not to ask them to open their bags.

  • dahax77 on 09/05/2024 - 11:03
    -1

    I wish someone had shoplifted this ridiculous post so I didn't waste my time reading it (and now commenting on it)

  • tsunamisurfer on 09/05/2024 - 11:10
    +4

    Please just don't steal.

    The people paying for it are :

    • Not Coles.
    • Not Woolworths.
    • Not their insurers.
    • the other non-stealing customers.
    • Cheaplikethebird on 09/05/2024 - 14:40
      +1

      Yeah the social contract no longer exists, it's every man for himself.

  • altomic on 09/05/2024 - 11:11
    +2

    I'd steal the heart of the deli manager.

    a healthy heart can fetch up to $25,000 on the black market.

    • mrdean on 09/05/2024 - 14:43

      You'd seriously let all the other organs go to waste?

      • altomic on 09/05/2024 - 19:36
        +3

        Feed a family for less than $10.

  • mrdean on 09/05/2024 - 11:31

    RHCP co-founders Kiedis & Flea used to do this regularly in their younger days. They subscribe to the whatever you do eventually comes back to you philosophy.

  • Trying2SaveABuck on 09/05/2024 - 11:32

    well 'cash in the till' should be the correct answer if this was a poll

  • TheRealCher on 09/05/2024 - 13:44

    Self serve checkouts

    • factor on 10/05/2024 - 19:20
      +1

      I'd just take the scales from the self-serve checkouts - straight to the nearest metal recycler. The rest of it works well enough - even the cameras to recognise fruit a pretty good now.

      I've no issue with good fast self-serve checkouts. I've got issue with anti-human computer programming and pushing Alpha-software onto paying customers.

  • El cheepo on 09/05/2024 - 13:46
    +1

    zero - moral - repercussions

    Morals are deeper than if you can simply get away with something without affecting others.

    That discussion point alone would of been a better can of worms to open than what ever the rest of this is.

    • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:15

      No, OP is effectively saying your brain also melts away post purchase so you don't deal with moral issues.

  • eek on 09/05/2024 - 14:01

    Can you shoplift a bunch of visa / eftpos gift cards? You'll be making money then!?!! Does it need to be declared to the ATO?

    • AustriaBargain on 09/05/2024 - 15:54
      +1

      Well no, the cards wouldn't be activated. And you'd have to eat the cards in your own home.

      • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:15

        You eat your cards .. out in public?

  • Dollar General on 09/05/2024 - 14:44

    Broccoli

    • TerryJustTerry on 10/05/2024 - 08:09
      +1

      Okay mum whatever you say…

  • ihfree on 09/05/2024 - 17:16

    How's the magic power work if you tell the staff that you're shoplifting?

    • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:16

      Blip like repercussions for the staff. A slow fade.

  • funnysht1 on 09/05/2024 - 21:29

    rem the covid times when private businesse..e..g landlords couldnt boot out people for paying rent- even though they could move into a smaller place etc and the onus was on landlords…

  • furyou on 09/05/2024 - 21:38
    +2

    Can I get 1mill dollars if I get this power and don't use it for a month? If I live in a cliff house with no wifi?

  • joelmuzz on 09/05/2024 - 21:52

    Could steal stuff now the security is hopeless and I see the local ferals do it all the time with no intervention from staff or dedicated security.
    I dont because why would I want to live with being a scumbag?

  • mrvaluepack on 09/05/2024 - 22:40
    +1

    Dont need to imagine or think about this, just look at it happening in America right now lol.

  • DONMAI on 09/05/2024 - 22:43
    +1

    AustriaBargain IRL https://9now.nine.com.au/a-current-affair/new-technology-tar…

    I don't even understand the question but I've already read it five times. I want to understand but refuse to read it again as I know we're being trolled.

    • mafmouf on 11/05/2024 - 00:18

      OP is Tracey Grimshaw, undercover for next week's ACA.

  • RefusdClassification on 10/05/2024 - 00:37
    +1

    There is a (theoretical) model of communism where the government operates warehouses and people can visit whenever they want and take whatever they want. Personally I feel that people should have to pay cost price for goods and sevrices to prevent waste and misuse; most people don't appreciate things that are completely free.

    I have no problem stealing from greedy capitalists who put 1000% markups on the actual production price of goods and services. They are the ones who are stealing from us with their huge profit margins which drive greedflation. An example: it costs about $1.50 AUD to mass produce a packet of of 28 generic 5mg Cialis pills; it costs $80+ to purchase that packet at retail in Australia.

    • Randolph Duke on 10/05/2024 - 10:18
      -2

      Is research, marketing, distribution free?

  • a-friend on 10/05/2024 - 01:02

    I'd be too busy trying to magically shoplift the self-checkout machine itself.

  • Miss B on 10/05/2024 - 06:39
    +1

    I'm not struggling financially. These stores are not going to take the hit financially, they just charge it to other customers and make their profits as normal. No, I wouldn't do it. I might try to justify it if I was doing it tough and pretend that I'm not just costing other people more money.

  • keejoonc on 10/05/2024 - 09:46

    Judging by the number of questions the OP asks on here, he/she clearly has too much time on their hands.

  • THICKnSLOW on 10/05/2024 - 09:59

    Get yourself a rich sugardaddy then you too can do this 'free shoplift anywhere' you want.

  • capslock janitor on 10/05/2024 - 10:09

    Bread

  • plmko on 10/05/2024 - 10:18

    OP is mentally ill.

  • zooter on 10/05/2024 - 11:48
    +1

    The one trick supermarkets don't want you to know!

  • Wasabi Ninja on 10/05/2024 - 12:51
    +3

    If your morals are based on not getting caught, then you have no morals.
    Happy to be honest in my dealings as that’s an important character trait to me.

    • AustriaBargain on 10/05/2024 - 12:53
      -3

      I probably should have made a poll. Oh well, next time.

  • Caped Baldy on 10/05/2024 - 13:15

    I did see an article about a bloke that had stolen thousands in premium steaks…

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