My Hypothesis: Unconditional Love and Conditional Love - The Difference between Male and Female Pop Songs

DeafMutePretender on 05/11/2019 - 20:21

This all started when I ended up hearing a Shania Twain song called That Don't Impress Me Much
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqFLXayD6e8

I'll isolate a few lines:

Okay, so you're a rocket scientist
That don't impress me much

I though girls liked smart guys? He's a rocket scientist so I'm sure he has a 6 figure salary which is good for financial stability.

Okay, so you're Brad Pitt
That don't impress me much

The biggest hunk of Hollywood doesn't turn you on? But you don't like the nerdy scientist either…

Okay, so you've got a car
That don't impress me much

You're not Saudi Arabian so fair dinkum.

Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something
Whatever
That don't impress me

At this point, I'm thinking, what DOES impress this queen?

Then I ended up listening to various love songs by male singers.

Bryan Adams - Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hq2KgzKETBw

Bon Jovi - Always
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BMwcO6_hyA

The impression I get is that men should love women unconditionally and sacrifice everything, even his own life, for her. While when it comes to men, women have many requirements he will need to meet before he can earn her love. Don't even talk about sacrifice on her part.

Even the top female-sung love songs are about women loving their man, but going independent. No talk about sacrificing everything for the man. No talk about loving man for who he is. Just women walking their own path without needing the man.

Whitney Houston - I Will Always Love You
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWTaaS7LdU

Céline Dion - My Heart Will Go On
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNIPqafd4As

Olivia Newton John - I honestly love you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOyUUCJY6kE

Are these valid observations?

Is there a male version of That Don't Impress Me Much that is just as popular?

Okay, so you're a Victoria's Secret model
That don't impress me much

Entertainment

Comments

  • spackbace on 05/11/2019 - 20:27
    +10

    Just wait till you hear "My Neck, My back (Lick It)" by Khia. I think you should probably analyse that and report back with your findings

    Oh and pretty sure love songs are written for women. So whatever sounds best for them, is how they'll write it.

    Maybe "Bloke" by Chris Franklin is one to check out

    • bossmode on 05/11/2019 - 20:28
      +1

      👁👄👁

      • spackbace on 05/11/2019 - 20:30
        +3

        Did I just get kissed? 😂

        • pegaxs on 05/11/2019 - 22:04
          +2

          Oh, my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard…

    • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 11:35

      "My Neck, My back (Lick It)" by Khia

      A favourite of yours, Spack?

      • spackbace on 06/11/2019 - 12:42

        The action, or the song? Can't say much for the song…

        • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 14:29

          No, can't say much for the song other than it was better not as bad as the retaliation track that soon followed from Too$hort…

  • fantombloo on 05/11/2019 - 20:31

    Not to say it has to be that way but in nature most warm blooded animals have males that need to impress females for courtship. From a biological (evolutionary) point of view male destiny is ultimately tied to the females they mate with so it's hardly surprising that males can almost deify females, till their biological purpose is realised or they get bored of them.

  • Ace Ventura on 05/11/2019 - 20:38

    Are you ok? Why are you reading so much into a few song lyrics?
    Music represents all aspects of society.
    Pretty sure you can find plenty of songs from each gender to fit both sides of the narrative.

  • Diji1 on 05/11/2019 - 20:51

    Pop songs are written so that 7 year old children can understand them.

  • Halo375 on 05/11/2019 - 21:02

    Marketing - they are purely writing for their brand and their market. No great truths will come out of studio pop songs.

  • chumlee on 05/11/2019 - 21:11
    +2

    You must have had one big girls weekend

  • Dungeon Master on 05/11/2019 - 21:16
    +1

    Interesting idea.
    Have you read The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi?

  • [Deactivated] on 05/11/2019 - 21:19
    -1

    Where does Extreme's More than words fit in?

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UrIiLvg58SY

    and please decipher Color me badd:

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kO6BtpIzIiM

    and Wa Wa Nee:

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DAHhjeXuiHk

    Final word has to go to George Michael:

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Yf_Lwe6p-Cg

  • Shitstorm on 05/11/2019 - 21:42
    -2

    A woman's brain is different to a man's, hence your hypothesis. If you're trying to understand women the easiest way is to just consider them as children. Get on /pol/ for further in depth analysis.

    • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 07:43
      +2

      Let me guess… You're single?

  • hawkeye on 05/11/2019 - 22:01

    In my era I grew up to clubbing to to tunes like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTFwQP86BRs&has_verified=1 for the youngings skip to a minute into it remember the old Calamvale hotel used to be a pickup place and pumping tunes out like this all the chicks where into it.

  • Bunnyburger on 05/11/2019 - 22:29

    Shhh don't talk about this. They'll call you incel!

  • outlander on 05/11/2019 - 22:49

    I'd suggest 'Bo Burnham - Repeat Stuff' but even though that song is 5 years old, its almost 2 decades after the time you seem to be living in.

  • Ughhh on 05/11/2019 - 23:15
    +1

    Right…

    If you look deeper into the songs, it'll tell you the meaning of life and how every single person works

  • p1 ama on 05/11/2019 - 23:46
    +6

    I think it's pretty interesting to look at these things - they tend to be reflective of society (in the sense that songs are written for the masses) or they shape society (in that people listen to songs and they usually are influenced by them to some degree).

    Overall, your observation seems to be correct. The general way that human dating/relationship works is that guys chase girls. Therefore, girls generally have choice and guys generally less so. This is abundantly obvious on online dating apps. One of my friends is a psychology PhD candidate and is looking at dating behaviour (loosely). She created "fake" profiles of females and males of various levels of attractiveness. Even the most attractive male only got even less matches than an average female. There are other factors to consider, like there are more males on the apps than females. Still doesn't change the conclusion, which is that males generally chase females.

    Goes back to the song - males want females and long for them, hence the male love songs of the unconditional love and sacrifice; women have more choices and hence, most songs are about choice and finding someone good enough for them.

    There's another observation that my friend made which is quite interesting as well, which is that males tend to view females as more attractive than females view males. E.g. you get a random selection of men and women into a room and get the men to rate the women and the women to rate the men, the average for men rating women is higher than the average for women rating men.

    Plenty of other things I'm sure and I'm not a psychologist so I don't know any more of this than what has come up in conversations with my mate.

    • Kangal on 06/11/2019 - 09:35
      +3

      These are correct.
      And it goes around to prove the Pareto Principal. Aka the 20/80 Rule, or the Rule of Hierarchies.
      That is, 80% of the Top Desirable Women will only date the Top 20% Desirable Men.

      I think it's important to remember biology in all of this.
      The genetic contribution females make is permanent in their eggs, so physical attributes are observably important. Whereas the genes that males contribute come from their sperm, and that is ever changing, and you can test for this if you look at the sperm of say a 15yo, 30yo, and 45yo male. There will be differences in the expression and code of the DNA. So males can get better, they are designed to compete.

      And if you think that doesn't make sense, think of the warring tribes.
      Three tribes have an equal 100 males and 100 females and are fighting each other. Tribe A sends out 90/10 males and females, Tribe B sends out 50/50 males and females, Tribe C sends out 10/90 males and females. Let's assume somehow the females fight as well as the males. Tribe A survives with 10 males and 90 females, Tribe B survives with 50 males and 50 females, Tribe C survives with 90 males and 10 females. After breeding and two years their populations increase. Tribe A has 180 new babies, Tribe B has 100 new babies, Tribe C has 20 new babies. The next time the tribes meet and goto war, it is likely Tribe A will defeat both Tribe B and Tribe C together.

      So women are inherently more desirable than men.
      I say this as a generalisation, the pyramid structure looks something like this: Bottom 10% is made from Unattractive Men, then the next 25% is made up of Average Men, the next layer is made of 15% Unattractive Women, then the next layer of 15% is made of Attractive Men, then it is followed by 25% of Average Women, and the top layer is 10% of Attractive Women. People can't usually see it but there's a tip of the pyramid, and this is inhabited by the Top 1% of the Most Attractive (Super) Men.

      So nature has the game stacked against men. You can either go MGTOW.
      Or you can try and win the game your way by levelling up. And to do so; here are the most important characteristics you should spec into:
      1. Effective Networking (the most important resource is other people)
      2. Financial Acumen (make yourself valuable, opens many doors)
      3. Continued Education (get smarter at your profession and surroundings)
      4. Assertive Communicator (Not Passive, get your message across, get what you need)
      5. Handiness (practical skills useful in many situations, but not entirely desirable)
      6. Self-control (Emotional Resistance is very useful but not vital)
      7. Physical Strength (power tools make muscles redundant)
      8. Self Defence (a bodybuilder can be killed by a toddler and gun)

      Consider a couple men each known different attribute: strength, skill, intelligence, wealth, and charisma/leader. And now there's a serious fight among them:

      The physically strong man is the first to get knocked out, by the skilful man with a stick. Both the skilful man is shot, by the intelligent man who now also has the stick. However, every other man is put into submission by the rich man who hires some thugs. The charismatic man had the wisdom to flee and convinces the village to riot, forcing the hired men to dissolve. And they beat the rich man to death, leaving the charismatic man to be victorious.

      The point of that exercise was to demonstrate how the attributes affect men, and in turn their worth or desirability. Mastering the first four will make you powerful, regardless of the last four points. If you master the last four points and not the former, you will fall into a niche, and it becomes more difficult to be powerful. So if you find yourself at the bottom of the pyramid, there are ways to climb up: become charismatic, get rich, get smart, and be assertive.
      There are things boys inherit, like attractiveness, wealth, and intelligence… but it is not hopeless.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 06/11/2019 - 15:59
        +1

        Thanks for the tip.

      • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 18:14

        What do you mean by "win the game"? From personal experience, it's not that hard to make someone fall in lust with you and want to have your babies but it's an all new kettle of fish to transform that lust into love and be able to sustain it over a lifetime.

        • Kangal on 07/11/2019 - 00:43
          +1

          Sorry, I meant "win the game" as in be successful in romantic relationship.
          Wether that's simply sex, or long-term commitment is upto the interpretation/desires of the male reader. The way to success for males is to reduce your expectations (date average or unattractive women) and increase your desirability. Mathematically speaking, say move yourself from being 60% Desirable to say being 70% Desirable, and reduce your aim at women from the 40% Desirable down to the 30% Desirable level. And as I tried to say, there are many little traits men can train themselves in to becoming better at them, and being more desirable.

          I know there are some men who can't get women to "fall in love" with them. And there are plenty more that fail to get them to "fall in lust". The majority of males fail at both. The pareto principal has been proven at play, the majority of women only want to breed with the minority of males. That's why I think its morally wrong to demonise the Chads and the Tyrones, because people who do that usually act with jealousy, and they can't image how their thinking occurs because they've never been in that position of high-desirability.

          I think the things that makes a woman stay is; having enough finance (cosy lifestyle), being funny (source of entertainment), outside appraisal (from your surroundings and her friends/family), and good sex.

          • [Deactivated] on 07/11/2019 - 16:39

            @Kangal: So a rich clown that her parents love like a dear son and who is good in bed? I tick 3 out of those 4 boxes. Is that enough? 🤔

  • HardlyCharly on 06/11/2019 - 01:22

    Welcome to sexism, toxic masculinity, and outdated nonsensical gender roles. Note that all the songs mentioned are quite old are products of their time. Not that modern pop doesn't suffer from the same crap, taken to even further extremes in fact, modern pop from 2008 or so onwards is just generally completely terrible without a single bit of artistic merit. The old stuff rose to the top because it was good, now something becomes popular because the basic sheep are told to get on their knees and gobble up whatever soulless s*** they're fed.

  • ssquid on 06/11/2019 - 01:48
    +7

    Is there a male version of That Don't Impress Me Much that is just as popular?

    As usual the answer lies in the words of the great Sir Mix-a-Lot:

    So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
    But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
    My anaconda don't want none
    Unless you've got buns, hon

  • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 07:18

    I think you'll find all your lovin' needs in I'm my own grandpa.

  • HighAndDry on 06/11/2019 - 09:53
    +2

    Unfortunately (for you and for men in general) neither a new phenomenon nor a new discovery. This has been the case, and known to be the case, for a long time now.

    Basically an extension of the adage that, for women, romance happens, for men, romance is planned.

    • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 16:48

      Unfortunately (for you and for men in general)

      Why the assumption that OP is a man?

      • HighAndDry on 06/11/2019 - 17:01

        That wasn't the assumption. It's unfortunate because OP thought their idea was unique or novel, when it's anything but.

        • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 21:30

          OP thought their idea was unique or novel

          I doubt that. OP is not the ingenue that she portrays herself to be here.She sells love and romance for a living and from her own admission, is very skillful at plying her wares.

          • ssquid on 07/11/2019 - 06:49

            @[Deactivated]: OP is either a bloke or a hairy woman, post history talks about growing a beard.

            He has a history of posting stuff just to get reactions, like this topic for example.

            • [Deactivated] on 07/11/2019 - 16:34

              @ssquid: I assumed OP was a woman based on his weird obsession with me. 4 out of the 5 times that this previously happened to me on ozb, they were women.

    • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 11:46

      Where Twain euphemistically refers to it as the "touch", Missy Elliot in her love song "Work it!" is more to the point when she asks:

      Is it worth it, let me work it
      If you got a big, let me search ya
      (elephant noise)
      To find out how hard I gotta work ya

      If they don't have "the touch", she goes on to say :

      Girls, girls, get the cash
      If it's nine to five or shakin' you ass
      Ain't no shame ladies, do your thing
      Just make sure you ahead of the game

  • [Deactivated] on 06/11/2019 - 21:23

    Does anyone know why OP's in the penalty box?

  • horice on 06/11/2019 - 21:39

    Seriously NSFW

    edit - deleted
    Probable inappropriate

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