After watching the 1999 Classic has anything changed in the last 19 years? Do we all still hate the soul-crushing feeling coming from the fluorescent light and crappy coffee machine?
If a 2018 Version of "Office Space" Was Created, What Would Be Some Changes?
adam456 on 06/08/2018 - 13:37
Last edited 06/08/2018 - 13:37
Last edited 06/08/2018 - 13:37
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icanhastags
Omg, especially company 'encouraged' social networking and positivity efforts. Like "Yay we're doing so well in X Y Z!" Or "Let's congratulate blah and blah for A B C!" No - I really really don't care, and if you really wanted to show appreciation, instead of worthless columns in the work newsletter, just give me more money. Or paid leave.
I loved and still love that movie.
The things I would add in the next remake would be :
1) The HR department, the crap policies and protocols they conjure up, they need to be killed. Eg. you are not allowed to consistently exclude people from your team when doing things socially.
2) Safety Moment….I would dearly like to take to this with a flamethrower.
3) Yammer…people sharing insame amount of useless news using w@nk words to promote their activities that 99% of the organise DGAF about.
Love them! God, the modern workplace is torture
Eg. you are not allowed to consistently exclude people from your team when doing things socially.
This! This especially is insane. It's never been enforced, but I'm sure my work's policy includes even social events completely unrelated to work.
My boss sat me down years ago and said "Complaints have been made they you exclude people from your lunchtime walks". I wish I could say she was kidding.
Oh I'm so glad no one has ever tried having that conversation with me. I think my response would get me fired on the spot.
Instead of only having 10 consultants from Deloitte or KPMG coming to deliver another restructure, you also get two or three Agile Coaches / SCRUM Masters
Um I believe HR sent out a company-wide email last week kindly asking our superduper team members to refrain from using negative, gendered terms like "restructure" and "forced retrenchment" :) :)
On that note our awesome amazing friends from KPMG have organised a super fun team building exercise!!!! Go team!!! We're going to play a game of musical chairs, isn't that fun and super, team? OMG I'm so excited to be able to work at such an awesome fun amazing company :) :) :)
If you miss out on a chair it's no biggy, we all know you did your best!!! There's plenty of super comfy chairs out the front of friendly Dave, hi Dave!!!, from HR's office, just go wait there until the next round starts :) :) :) :)
Do we all still hate the soul-crushing feeling coming from the fluorescent light and crappy coffee machine?
Wasn't working back in '99, but I can't imagine people enjoy working in cubicles these days any better. I'm lucky enough to get some sunlight, and we actually have a kickass coffee machine (and I also have fairly low standards) so I guess I shouldn't complain.
OH! Being almost 24/7 on call because of messaging and emails and smartphones… that'd have to be added in. Including a scene where the person would get a text/email, and just throw the phone out the window of a moving car.
The consultant would fire people because the workplace 'needs more diversity' and not enough genders.
You must not forget the coversheet for the gender equality report
Instead of getting a memo on your desk about missing the new TPS report cover page, you'd get an email about it.
with all the management Cc'd into the email also, very passive aggressively.
I think Jennifer Aniston would need a 'Make America great again' piece of flair.
Have you liked our company's latest posts to Instagram and Facebook? Have you followed our corporate Twitter Account? Why haven't you added our company as a Friend?
Etc.
managers need to use the word "synergy" at least 13 times in any meeting. Yeeeeeeea, if they can use it on Saturdays as well…..yeeeeea that would be great. hmm, I'm gonna need to ask them to use it on Sunday too……yeeeeeea
It would need to have a scene dealing with the issue of having to ignore facebook friend requests from coworkers you've spoken to once and have nothing in common with.
Can you still call it 'Federal Pound-me-in-the-a**' prison? Can you still make jokes about 'Naga…, Naga…, Nagonna work here anymore, that's for sure!'?
"I get in around 9:30 and usually zone out on OzBargain for an hour in front of my computer, but it looks like I'm working. I then zone out for another hour after lunch too. In fact, in a given day, I'd say I do fifteen minutes, of real, actual work."
Funnily enough the opposite complaint of Office Space, open space work stations instead of cubicles. I don't need to see and hear people from unrelated teams from my desk, and during downtime you end up twiddling your thumbs because your monitors are on display to everyone.
I used to own a printer that said PC Load Letter. To this day I still don’t know what it wanted.
Printer jam is now printer driver error.
Today's sentiment - OMG! I has job! Baller! Avocadoes!
Hastags!