Vote for The Less Weird Gender-Neutral Name

usherer on 16/12/2017 - 12:12
Last edited 17/12/2017 - 10:32 by 1 other user

I'm applying for jobs in editing, and have come to see that my Asian name would be an obstacle, despite having over ten years of experience in it (albeit having worked in international/British/American organisations, having worked in the UK before, and using English for work all my life).

I used to go by a nickname at my workplace, and see that it's no longer sufficient to do so. My research shows that male, Anglo Saxon names tend to have greater success to get past the first stage, so I am looking for a gender-neutral first name to do that.

I have shortlisted some names and hope you can help identify, using the lens of an Anglo Saxon recruiter, the most ideal one(s), the one that would made you go (in the first 10 secs), "Here is a name I have a soft spot for, belongs to someone who has a good command of the language, and I really want to have a look at their resume".

My preference is for 'Alexi' but I see that some people view it as Russian/Greek, which I have no problem with. However the point of my exercise is, I don't want problems from recruiters and HR.

I am also researching how to modify my last name (Ong).

Thanks!

Poll Options

  • 32
    Alexi
  • 224
    Alexandra
Education & Work

Comments

  • retiredfeline on 16/12/2017 - 12:14
    +99

    Why not just Alex?

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 12:18
      +6

      Say my real name is "Maylee Ong".
      I used to go by "Lee", so recruiters may call my referees and would ask for "Lee", saying I'm now "Alexandra/ Alex".

      This means there are 4 names for them to reckon with. I wanted to keep it simple and just use one for the upcoming resumes/interviews (that surely will be rolling in from now!).

      Does that make sense?

      Or are you saying that "Alex" is perfectly fine as a standalone?

      • retiredfeline on 16/12/2017 - 12:22
        +21

        I don't get it, are you already Alexandra on your BC? If not, what difference does it make if you call yourself Alex Ong on resumes and give Maylee Ong to the HR department after you are hired, for bank deposits and payment summaries?

        People in Asia have always been adding on "Christian" names for various reasons. Sometimes their choices were a bit weird, I know of people who called themselves Rocky and I've read of one Chlorine Lam.

        • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 12:25
          +3

          So you mean "Alex" is good in itself. I wasn't aware of that. I'd always thought "Alex" for girls has to be the short form of a longer name.
          Thanks!

        • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 12:27

          I never saw the need to do that, and have forged a career (that I saw as successful) in other countries without the need to. This is precisely why I take this name-changing exercise, and doing it in my mid-30s, so seriously.

        • retiredfeline on 16/12/2017 - 12:34
          +12

          @usherer: You can give yourself whatever name you like on resumes and in interviews. Just make sure that HR has your legal name. I ran into a bit of hassle when I asked HR to change my super fund for deductions. The super fund sent me a letter saying they rejected payment because of the mismatch and to contact HR. Twice. Turned out HR had to go change it in their salaries portal or something like that.

        • xoom on 16/12/2017 - 13:45
          +3

          Went to school with a viet guy who wanted to change his name to Bruce as he idolises Bruce Lee.

        • xoom on 16/12/2017 - 13:56

          @greenpossum: same exact thing happened to this korean guy i worked with.

        • Randxyz123 on 16/12/2017 - 14:24
          +8

          @usherer: Alex would be perfectly fine.

          I have quite a few colleagues at work with Asian first names.

          What I would do is write something like Maylee Ong(preferred name: Alex) for your resume.
          This is what my colleagues have done. I think it's mostly because they are all sales facing, it's just easier.

          Once you start your job, you should be able to change what appears in the corporate directory. Most organisations allow email aliases as well. That way you have everything changed but on anything offical like payslips etc your actual name SHOULD appear.

          Let's say my name was Jonathan but I preferred Jon. I can change my "preferred name" in the HR portal in my organisation. I'd imagine most organisations are the same.

          I wouldn't bother with changing your last name.

        • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:36

          @xoom: Come to think of it, I have never met a Bruce in my life. It doesn't seem common in contemporary pop culture either. Wikipedia says it's a Scottish name. I wonder if it's strange for Scots to encounter a Bruce too.

        • [Deactivated] on 16/12/2017 - 21:53
          -8

          I've read of one Chlorine Lam.

          Them: OK, no probrem, Chrorine it is.
          Me: No, i said Corinne ffs!

        • retiredfeline on 16/12/2017 - 21:58
          +33

          @AngryChicken: I like to think that when she grew up, she met Sodium Chan, there was chemistry and sparks flew. :)

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 01:14

          @greenpossum: And together became the salt of the earth.

        • fozzie on 17/12/2017 - 09:52
          +1

          @usherer: yes Alex can be a name for girls

        • Musing Outloud on 17/12/2017 - 12:49
          +1

          Bruce is famous in Scotland. Robert the Bruce was King.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:08
          -1

          @homersimpson: Oh yes, continuing the battle from your racially vilifying posts of yesterday (since deleted). Get a life.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:30
          +1

          @AngryChicken:
          Pot calling the kettle black.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:32
          -2

          @homersimpson: My joke wouldn't meet the threshold. Your brazen racist statements from the other day were well within it.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:33

          @AngryChicken:
          Says a person who condones illegal behavior and theft.
          You other comment sure did and got nuked as a result.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:37

          @homersimpson: I didn't condone anything of the sort. I said you're a hypocrite - breaching one law (against racial vilification) while criticising others for breaching another law (theft etc). Get your facts right. What's your next red herring? Go away, and stop trying to hijack this thread to fight old battles (that you lost).

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 16:39

          @AngryChicken:
          You got a massive chip on the shoulder in addition to the selective amnesia that you suffer from. Just because your brethren are doing shoplifting and robberies, you condone it.

        • serpserpserp on 17/12/2017 - 18:24

          @homersimpson:

          You mean Choirine?

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 19:32

          @usherer:

          I know a few Bruces. They are all either of various Asian descent, or dogs. Never met a white Bruce.

        • usherer on 17/12/2017 - 19:35

          @Musing Outloud: In 'Robert de Brus', would 'de' mean 'of'? Does that mean Brus/ Bruce is a noun? A clan?

        • anastasiastarz on 17/12/2017 - 20:58

          @usherer: Never met a Bruce either, and I've done registrations for many marathons and the likes.

        • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 23:37

          @anastasiastarz: Bruce doesn't waste his time with marathons.

        • The Gent on 18/12/2017 - 00:12

          @usherer: It's short for Alexander :)

        • BadGiraffe on 18/12/2017 - 12:33

          and I've read of one Chlorine Lam.

          That's better than "Hydrogen" or "Atom". Those are legit names. Names of lecturers.

        • wkd on 18/12/2017 - 13:10

          @xoom: reminds me of that movie they still call me bruce

        • Choc0 on 18/12/2017 - 13:56

          @usherer: Batman says hello.

        • bluesky on 18/12/2017 - 21:47

          @flaminglemon: These two names stuck in my mind when I saw them for the first time - Fruit Chan and Fish Leong. I am thinking this is a useful way to be noticed and remembered in the entertainment industry! Whether it would work just as well in other areas, to score an interview, is debatable.

        • Lumens on 19/12/2017 - 13:52

          @polk:

          Think Bruce Springsteen

        • [Deactivated] on 19/12/2017 - 22:36

          @Lumens:

          I'm aware that white Bruces do exist, but oddly enough neither Bruce Springsteen or Willis have come around my house.

        • Musing Outloud on 28/12/2017 - 22:07

          @usherer: That is a possibility, but I cannot say. I have had several friends called Bruce, none Scottish.
          And it has been popular in the past because it is the basis of that very old joke about calling everybody Bruce to save confusion.

      • peterpeterpumpkin on 16/12/2017 - 14:01

        If you want honesty, as soon as I see the surname Ong I think of a Singaporean (based on the Ongs I met at uni). Googling tells me it's an English surname too (which reminds me of a lot of Asian sounding Dutch names) but I don't imagine the average person would go the extra step.

        I suppose if I had to pick the most in vogue Alex-related name it would be Lexi, but I wouldn't think it's gender neutral (maybe Lex as in Luther? You'll sound tough). Like your friends, Alexi reminds me of a Russian weightlifter.

        Ironically, when it comes to senior editing roles, I imagine a lot of hiring managers are female and biased against females themselves.

        • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:45
          +3

          I am from Singapore indeed :)
          I haven't met or heard of any English person with Ong as a last name.

          Lexi - Apparently there's research showing that women's names ending with "-ee" are not too promising either! I'm skeptical of that. Since I'm now all about just doing what it needs to take to get a job I like, I'm going to go all out, and just get a safe name.

          Lex - That does sound a bit tough/rough. Somehow it makes me think of a bulldog.

          Bias in senior editing roles - That's an interesting thought. I started off in a female-dominated environment, worked in lots of one-person roles, and was a manager in my last position, so I've been immune/blind to such bias. Now that you've brought it up, my senior editors in the last five years of my career have been (still are!) male. But I suppose such bias are commonplace as I've always wondered about top chefs/fashion designers etc who seem to be dominantly male when those domains (cooking/fashion etc ) are feminised.

        • anastasiastarz on 17/12/2017 - 20:59
          +1

          @usherer: Isn't Lex that evil bald guy from Smallville? I feel like that name is too short and bland.

        • BadGiraffe on 18/12/2017 - 12:43
          +1

          @usherer: Yay! Another Singaporean! Where are you based?

          Anyway, I had trouble getting jobs back home because I wasn't Chinese. Go figure. I don't think racism is as bad as back home. Then again, it depends on which city you're in. Melbourne and Sydney seem to be fine alright. I've heard it's hard in places like Queensland.

      • oztite on 17/12/2017 - 01:47
        +2

        In my experience, "Maylee O'Donohue" will get you more job offers than "Alex Ong"… A white-washed surname is the way to go to get job interviews…

        • usherer on 17/12/2017 - 08:45
          +2

          I'm considering the implications of this. Someone else here pointed out it is not illegal. But I imagine it might be very confusing for the company. What kind of impression would they have of an Asian person who rocks up with a completely English name that is nowhere in any record?

        • Munki on 17/12/2017 - 19:19

          @usherer: You could be adopted by an Irish family…

        • freakatronic on 18/12/2017 - 08:38
          +2

          @usherer: you could have married yourself a white surname.

        • AustriaBargain on 18/12/2017 - 09:44

          I'd hire an O'Donohue as an editor in a second.

        • aong152 on 18/12/2017 - 14:14
          +4

          My name's Alex Ong and i got all the job interviews!

        • lakers1222 on 20/12/2017 - 07:22

          @aong152:

          username checks out

      • GetOffMyUnicorn on 17/12/2017 - 08:25
        +5

        If your biggest problem is choosing a new name then you have no problems……

    • GetOffMyUnicorn on 17/12/2017 - 05:18

      "Vote for the less weird gender-neutral name"

      Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.

      • xoom on 17/12/2017 - 07:11
        +18

        Thats sexist. Im an apache helicopter.

        /s

        • GetOffMyUnicorn on 17/12/2017 - 09:14
          +1

          Ariel;)

        • Belts on 17/12/2017 - 11:07
          +2

          Ah, I see you are a man of culture as well ;)

        • DarwinBoy on 18/12/2017 - 11:14
          +1

          The apache is a boy. It just has its penis under its chin.

      • frewer on 18/12/2017 - 21:17

        Kekzistan Needs You

    • Lucky13 on 19/12/2017 - 17:36

      Yeah I vote for just Alex like greenpossum suggested. Both Alexi and Alexandra are both girls names and not gender neutral. Alex works for both male and female.

  • whooah1979 on 16/12/2017 - 12:18
    +3

    You want white sounding name? Ale is from that part of the world.

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 12:19
      +4

      Sounds like beer!

      And yes. I want need to whitewash my name.

  • aussieprepper on 16/12/2017 - 12:45
    +3

    Why not Al?

    Al Bundy lol

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgDtgyzVZYk

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:47

      For a minute, I thought you were referring to the murderer! (Ted Bundy)
      Al seems like a comic name from North America - think: "Weird Al"
      Thanks for your two cents!

    • oztite on 17/12/2017 - 01:41
      +1

      Or El. I think Eleven is pretty gender neutral…

      • Baysew on 17/12/2017 - 10:29
        +2

        Perhaps Seven of Nine.

        (Avoid Seven of Eleven)

    • Meconium on 17/12/2017 - 16:15
      +1

      If you'll be my bodyguard, I can be your long-lost pal.

    • syousef on 19/12/2017 - 13:57
      +1

      I thought you were going to say why can't we all get Al Ong?

  • Steptoe on 16/12/2017 - 12:50
    +11

    Just change your last name to OMG.

    • xoom on 16/12/2017 - 13:47
      +4

      Change it to O G.

      Original Gangster

      • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:48
        +2

        How about something related to my profession then: WYSIWYG

        • Meconium on 17/12/2017 - 16:16
          +3

          Or PEBKAC

      • [Deactivated] on 17/12/2017 - 22:43
        +2

        O G

        … Definitely thought you were going to say oriental gangster :/

  • kerfuffle on 16/12/2017 - 12:55
    +46

    Alexandra is not a gender-neutral name. That's a girl's name. Alexi I always assumed was a man's name.

    If you want gender-neutral, you can choose your aforementioned Alex. Or Ashley. Or Courtney

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:48

      Thanks

      • gimli on 17/12/2017 - 08:30
        +2

        or Taylor

      • Jackson on 18/12/2017 - 00:16

        On that note what are you editing? Movies?

        • usherer on 18/12/2017 - 10:54

          Publications.

    • Noblejoker on 17/12/2017 - 11:54

      Alex is also one of the most common names of the lat few years including Alex, Alexander and Alexis
      All of which can be referred to as Alex for short

      Personally though - what do u identify as - i would recommend you shorten to Lee - at least it is at least part of your name already
      Seriously do u want to work somewhere that they discriminate against you by name anyway?
      I may be naive but ..

    • ronnknee on 18/12/2017 - 08:59

      Didn't know Courtney was a gender-neutral name. I thought it was a female name because of Courtney Cox (actress for Monica in Friends) but haven't heard of it as a name for a guy.

      • kerfuffle on 18/12/2017 - 09:34
        +1

        It’snit as common, but there’s a few!

        • lousy on 18/12/2017 - 10:12
          +2

          Yes know a male Courtney - do feel for him

      • usherer on 18/12/2017 - 10:54

        And Courtney Love!

      • DarwinBoy on 18/12/2017 - 11:18
        +1

        Courtney Walsh the cricketer. West Indies captain, quite good in his time.

  • [Deactivated] on 16/12/2017 - 12:57
    +3

    Get some 80s Dynasty cred with Alexis.

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:48
      -1

      Not gender neutral enough. thanks though!

      • anastasiastarz on 17/12/2017 - 21:01

        Sam or Alex. Why don't you want people to know if you're a girl or boy? I'm curious if your resume would give that away? e.g. I'm on a committee for a women's club.

        • usherer on 17/12/2017 - 21:10

          No thanks to my confusing post title, I've got votes on Alexandra (female name). You reckon I should have Alex as a standalone or if it's less weird by having Alexandra. e.g. It's ok for an eastern European to have Vladimir as a name but not for a Chinese.

          I was thinking, since I'm prepared to whitewash my name, I might as well make it less feminine as research also shows that male names tend to succeed more in certain domains. I don't know the specifics for my area and just want to play safe.

          However being normal is more important than being safe. Alexandra or Alex Ong?

          I've worked on a number of projects related to women's issues.

        • anastasiastarz on 17/12/2017 - 21:22
          +1

          @usherer: I'd go with Alexandra, but then introduce myself as Alex. I've noticed that with all the Tims/Toms their full name is Timothy/Thomas - unless they're asian, in that case it's just Tim/Tom officially.

        • usherer on 17/12/2017 - 21:25

          @anastasiastarz: cheers!

        • lousy on 18/12/2017 - 10:14
          +2

          I also don't understand the need for a gender neutral name ?
          However Alex definitely.

    • Winston100s on 17/12/2017 - 01:32
      +2

      Too much Texas in Alexis

  • try2bhelpful on 16/12/2017 - 13:13
    +16

    Alex is your best bet, it could be Alexander to Alexandra.

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:48

      Thanks!

      • try2bhelpful on 16/12/2017 - 19:54

        best of luck with the job hunt.

        The only issue I could see for editing is a concern on the proficiency in English; however, I think this wouldn't be an issue for you.

        You would also think having an Asian language might be useful in the current employment environment.

        • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 20:10
          +1

          Thanks for the well wishes!

          The issue is very real. If they notice my real first name and last name, they might just bin the resume, or assume the resume is fake. Or they might just go with less hassle - choose a "Steve White" who has an Aussie accent, Aussie experience, and went to Aussie schools they know of.

          I have eliminated my knowledge of an Asian language as the jobs I'm applying for involve only English, so including my ability in Mandarin might be a handicap. They would assume my fluency in Mandarin is high than in English.

  • Findo on 16/12/2017 - 13:17
    +5

    There was a guy named Nobel Harvard at my high school. No joke. His name was the most white (and obnoxious) name ever but everyone guessed he was Asian with huge expectations on his shoulder just by his name. Poor kid.

    Why not call yourself Alex <insert original Asian sounding name here> Ong?

    • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 19:50

      What happened to him after high school?
      It's tough for anyone named "Bruce", "Adolf" etc The names are just too singularly (in)famous. I assume in future "Elon", "Brad" would get the same treatment.
      I've met some Vladimirs. I wonder how recruiters look at their names.

      • Findo on 16/12/2017 - 21:40
        +1

        I’ll ask my sister, the kid was in her year

        • asianbargain on 17/12/2017 - 09:12

          I want to know too

        • EyyBanane on 18/12/2017 - 02:00
          +1

          May be he changed his name. Facebook and LinkedIn search checks out.

      • anastasiastarz on 17/12/2017 - 21:03
        +1

        There was a Vlad, exchange kid at school XD I met a girl with a cat called Adolf…

      • stralya on 20/12/2017 - 13:05

        Or Elvis

    • try2bhelpful on 16/12/2017 - 19:55
      +11

      Swear to God, we had a guy in my sister's class at school called Richard Head. His parents should have been shot.

      • usherer on 16/12/2017 - 20:11

        When was he born? And when did "Richard" start getting shortened to "Dick"? If it's a modern trend, then his parents can't be held responsible.

        I would change my name if I were him.

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