It is quicker to save money while living with you parents.
This is at the detrement of my mental health (jks, not jks)…
At which point is it more worthwhile to move out than to live at home?
Don't mind living at home(love my folks), i save heaps of money. But its doing my head in.
FWIW - mid twenties,male
OzB….
What's your thoughts?
How do you guys balance it?
What's your "lifestyle vs finance" story?
The 40min commute into the city to catch up with mates, watch footy games, etc.
They're a bit old fashioned - pretty boring conversations.
But this thread isn't about me.
I know your pain all too well. I was living with my parents basically until I got engaged (30!). Saved a lot of money, but it was painful and stressful, especially the 2.5 hours of daily commuting down the Monash. Moved out just before we got married to a rental for just about 14 months and we're now in our first home for almost a year.
It's painful, but honestly, if a girl isn't going to date you because you're being financially responsible and not throwing your money away then maybe she's not the right one for you (we're ozbargainers after all). My wife and I live pretty frugally even if we're earning decent money together. At the end of the day it's your own decision, but especially as you're FIFO, do you really spend that much time at home anyway?
"Yes mum" "Ok mum" for a few more years and then when you're gone they'll want you to come over more often. Go figure
Did you buy even further out and have a longer commute?
There must be some strong 'single', girl-less vibes in this thread.
I haven't mentioned my relationship status, but it gets bought up often. Must be an internet thing.
Nah, don't spend that much time at home… maybe a bit over half the year.
How long did it take you to save?
What was your deposit & what did you purchase?
@milesaway: Ha! Good point - I just picked up from what everyone else was saying - maybe they're all just projecting on to your situation. Well then that's not an issue, so it's really just your sanity in dealing with your parents :P
Took us about 3 years to save up to about $140k deposit (that's including the money we'd already saved individually). Bought in Bayside area after 2 years of looking, and our budget went from $600k all the way to $800k in that time, and we got priced out of areas that we were interested during that time. You can only buy when you're ready to buy.
I'm glad we spent the time we did looking around and picking the right place, even though it felt like we paid a lot more than we originally intended to, we made the best choice. Our place has increased in value by $100k in less than 11 months, which is just ridiculous, and there's no way you'll be able to chase these current deposits if you're paying rent.
Are you single? Would you date someone who still lived with their parents? (I'd have reservations about their maturity unless there was a compelling reason - e.g. building a business, parents travel most of the year so the house is otherwise empty etc…)
A share house could give you some savings while still not living with parents. Just pick your flatmate/s carefully.
I work fly in & out.
I'm usually home probably 16 out of 28 nights.
Less of an issue I suppose. What about a share house with other FIFO guys if you really feel the need to move?
I want some r&r when i'm at home…
@milesaway: only thing I can suggest that might help is booking a cheap place every now and then somewhere to give yourself some "me time" and R&R. During weekdays as well I'm sure there's some super cheap nightly rates, even if it's in the same suburb as your parent's place at least you can unwind properly for a night or two per month. Just a thought.
My wife (fiance at the time) went away to cheap little weekend getaway roadtrips pretty often to keep our sanity. There's lots of deals on local accommodation, and that way you're also helping out local jobs :)
Would you date someone who still lived with their parents?
I would look at what they are doing with this opportunity.
Are they saving money or blowing it on alcohol, drugs, ciggies, and un-necessry Xiaomi products?
You will probably not get another opportunity to have such a money saving arrangement again, even if you pay board.
Good point.
As for unnecessary, the Xiaomi stuff is normally at the better end of the ozbargain stuff I buy :)
As a 23 year old, I can't see myself moving out of my parents' home until I'm about 30.
There's no point moving out, hating life and living just above the poverty line just so you can meet "society's expectations".
Wait until you're financially stable enough to move out.
We'll have plenty of time to be living independently for the next 50 years… No rush.
But doesn't it do your head in?
You're only 23 once…
Right now I understand exactly how you feel, but no it doesn't… Because in the long run I know this will be the better decision.
You have to not look at just the short term "satisfactions", but focus on the long term.
I'd rather live with my parents until I'm 30 and then be able to buy a decent home in a decent location, rather than jump from rental to rental and not have anything to show for it when I'm 30 (rent money literally disappears into thin air).
Just wondering if you don't mind disclosing… Have you discussed this with your parents? What do they say? Are they OK with you freeloading being a dependant or do they expect certain inputs from you too?
If my kids grow up thinking they are going to live with me until 30 I will move out and charge them full rent.
Yeah I don't like the idea of having kids around that long but considering our generations are pricing them out of their own homes I think there may be certain imperatives on us too.
@thevofa:
Yea, it gets discussed.
They appreciate how expensive houses are (they were 'lucky' to purchase a couple at opportune times), and wish to do everything they can to help me get a leg up. I'm sure they want me to move out, get married, buy a house, a new car, have kids, etc. But you probably don't need me to repeat the gen Y plight.
Like I said, love them to bits. But they're from a different generation.
It's a conundrum isn't it?
We can either save rent (at the mercy of our landlord), or live at home to save.
Yes, they would prefer me save up for a proper home rather than spending thousands on rent (and not having anything to show for it).
We've agreed that I'll be paying most of the bills once I get a full time job. My parents are very understanding, they understand the housing market is quite tough right now.
OP….stay at home, save the money, should properties become affordable again you could be well placed to take advantage of it.
Your parents love you and want the best for you.
Just remember to put a sign up and lock the door when you bring back a girl.
Source : Lesson learned the hard way from me.
My heart rate increased while reading this post
I would say leave! Totally worth it, I left at 17, I love sort of making it myself now I have a job and everything and it taught me a lot about being an individual, living by myself, making real choices and all that. Though I will say I wanted to leave, but I also had to leave since we're from the country and thats the only way I could go to uni.
In saying that, living with family is the "smartest" decision, you save a whole heap more money that way, family helps family (I'm in Sydney alone, if anything happens I have no one to turn to here). If you have dreams of buying a house or something, its probably your only real option (besides striking rich or being super good at saving and getting a great job).
A bit out of it but I noticed after living away from home a few years, when I came back for 12 months (visit family before I started working full time) they treated me way differently, I was an adult to them, not "a kid" the rules were mine, and it was as if I was visiting them, not really staying there. That worked perfect for me because it didn't do my head in, I felt I was an individual. I'm wondering whether even if its only a few years, might be worth living on your own? live it up for a couple years, then settle back in with parents to save money. I imagine though any thoughts of planning completely go's out the window once you get a significant other lol.
A bit coy with my info…
I have lived away - during uni, working overseas, and working interstate. I was defiantly 'living it', alas besides some killer stories, I don't have much next to my name.
Meh. Stories are what enrich your life, so don't regret what you've already done. You just need to decide what your priorities are now in life (and boy do they change). Besides, you can at least tell your wild stories on your death bed to your loved ones, but you can't take a Porsche with you on the way out.
I actually heard someone say this the other week "I'm here for a good time, not a long time". XD
I'd advise you to move out as soon as possible, I left home at 19 and I'm quite glad I did because I learned to stand up for myself and run a household at a relatively young age.
You'll end up with more cash in your hand if you stay home, but you'll develop life skills if you move out, so it really depends on which of those you're more geared towards at this point in time.
I have a slightly negative view of staying at home for long after you graduate because I have a couple of friends who lived with their parents until they were ~30, as much as they both have houses now they also both severely lack social skills which resulted in isolation related issues that affect their ability to build social and professional relationships. So while they both 'own' houses, both of them struggle to hold down jobs in order to pay them off.
Also, I don't think I could deal with having to walk out and face my parents after I'd just brought a girl to my room, they'd probably expect me to be wearing pants or something, jeez… :D
How does living at home cause 'isolation related issues' with social and professional relationships? You can still build work relationships no matter your living arrangement. You can still build friendships…I can see a relationship possibly suffering because of living with parents but I do know people who do it and it's currently working for them. I guess it depends on how meddling the parents might be but not all parents are like that.
@pikapika
It definitely depends on the personalities involved, in these instances it was a bit of a case of them spending too long in an overly supportive environment which didn't set them up all that well for life in the working world..
I've lived in boarding houses (7-16 neighbours) and I can tell you I most certainly have 'isolation related issues'. Maybe it's because I'm not a people person, or maybe because my neighbours are the worst people I have ever made and made me the worst possible version of me, that I have yet to recover from. shrugs
Another reason to move out - You can bring friends over, host dinner parties and sleepovers.
But if I move out, i'll be at the mercy of my landlords.
1yr here, 6months there.
And it'd cost.
$230/wk for rent.
$60/wk for food (living with more ppl reduces food cost)
$50/month elec bills
$15k / yr.
Plus furniture, appliances, etc.
rent - can be worth it to live in a better location (for work or close to friends), and just independence skills.
food - can be worth it to have control over your diet (for instance one friend had issues saying no when he was continuously being fed pasta style meals, at detriment to his health he said).
bills - cheapest of them all, but control to get the best internet connection can be great.
overall it feels good to be in control of your own life in every aspect, and there is a lot of invaluable skills to be learnt by living independent of your family.
When you reach the point where chores aren't chores but more it feels good in a way that you feel like you are looking after yourself.. to me that is part of progression into adulthood. IMO
That said I have some housemates who have been living independently for years, who still struggle with procrastinating on simple tasks like hanging out washing. But generally they have no ambition to do anything beyond gaming :P
Also landlords are no issue, seriously.
It's odd that you're trying to justify living with your parents as a lifestyle choice.
Not really… I'm saving more money than I would if I was to live in Fitztroy.
Thats how i'm justifying it.
My grammar may not reflect that :)
Why does everyone want to live in Hipsterville? And how big is that suburb, as it seems like everyone of a certain age/type lives there?
yeah but you're living with your parents?
Nothing wrong with living with your parents until you are ready to move out, so long as your parents don't mind you leeching. I'm in my mid 20s too and coming from an Asian background I am not expected to move out until I get married/am ready. Most of my Asian friends still live at home too.
Living at home allowed my partner and me to save roughly $200k in 3 years (we were frugal AF) and we recently bought our first house together :). With this in mind, I would say living at home is definitely the wiser choice, however, it really depends what your long term goals are and what makes you happy.
O.o 200k in 3 years? Can I have your income?
Haha I was earning peanuts until very recently… We literally saved every cent we could and we have OzB to thank for that!
You can sugar coat it all you want but you couldn't pay me $200k to have 0 privacy .
You seem to have a problem with living with your parents? My parents are quite easy going so that definitely helps. I don't feel that living at home has restricted me in any way.
3 years of privacy vs being able to afford a house.
I guess us plebs can't have everything eh.
I moved out at 20 straight out of uni to work in a different city, and watched all of my friends (in new and old city) live with their parents for years after that. The whole time I was thinking how rich I would be if I was earning money and still living at home like them. But they would spend it like they had no responsibilities - because they really didn't.
The point is, you need to put cash away as if you were spending it on rent, food, utilities, etc. Don't take it easy on the savings - you're staying at home TO SAVE MONEY, so make sure you do.
Tip - You can set it up so that everytime you get paid $x amount or a percentage is sent to long term savings.
I'd love at home if I could, but folks are nuts. On the plus side, I can game till 4am and eat ice cream for breakfast!
I save for lifestyle, if that make sense :)
Mate. We cant help you. You gotta figure it out for yourself. But a self contained section of the property such as a granny flat or converting a large room to a studio unit would help you.
If you really want do what I did and try it for a year then go back then if you want try it for another year.. the experience is great I mean who doesn't love their own space and freedom but for me balance is the key. Too much of anything can become a bad thing even for the sake of savings.. heal your sanity first savings later.. but if you can take it.. stay with your parents for as long as you possibly can renting is a sinkhole of money and dreams.
Hope you find the right choice OP good luck.. for me it was moving out at 25.
Depends on your income and qualifications.
You could always try a small share house (most of the furniture provided?) and see how that experience goes.
Moving into a small place by yourself before you can really comfortably afford it is going to 1) create a real steep lifestyle creep 2) Be a huge drain on your expenses.
Best to tolerate it while it still seems mostly "normal".
What does ur head in exactly