Abusive eBay seller - should I follow through with purchase?

Yesterday I was the winning bidder on an eBay item.

While requesting the total from the I seller, I added a polite message asking if the the item could be posted in an AP Prepaid Satchel. The postage figure in the listing was $30 for standard postage + tracking, however the item only weighs 1kg and could easily fit into a 3kg satchel, which is still tracked.

Anyway, the seller later sends through the total without replying to my message, and the shipping is still $30.

Perhaps they didn't see my message, so I re-request the total, but also send a separate message mentioning the original note in the "total request", and adding that the shipping amount requested is double what it should cost, and suggesting $20 as more reasonable (which is still well over what it should cost, packaging included).

Seller sends through total again, postage is still $30, and they still haven't replied to anything I've written to them.

So I use the "contact seller" option, and write, "Do you always ignore messages from your buyers?"

Soon after I get two abusive messages from the the seller. The first describes me (and other buyers like me) as "so bloody difficult" and that postage was clearly stated so "bloody pay for it and if not ill file an unpaid item for on you and that's that"

The second says I'm a "pain in the ass with your fn rudeness"

Now I've bought and sold hundreds of items on eBay over more than a decade, I'm a good eBay citizen and only bid on items I intend to actually purchase, and if they'd replied with some reasonable explanation for the significantly higher postage (e.g. "I'm sending in a big strong box with lots of padding so it arrives safely") I'd happily pay and move on.

However to receive these sorts of messages from someone I'm now guessing is actually just trying to gouge some extra profit, I'm actually tempted to just not pay and take an unpaid item strike (my first!), just on principal.

Perhaps I'm overreacting though - would others here just pay up, or this unreasonable behaviour from the seller?

Cheers,
DM.


EDIT:
I seem to have not explained myself too well.

It's not the inflated postage cost I object to here - my maximum bid took the $30 postage figure into account, and I still won the auction for less than I was willing to pay.

I object to a seller first not bothering to reply to a polite request, and then abusing me when pulled up about it and being challenged about the postage fee.

Many private sellers I've purchased from have quoted a nominal "round figure" postage fee to cover all bases, and then adjust that depending on the postcode of the buyer's shipping address. Often I'll message before an auction to clarify this, sometimes it's after I've won an item that I've asked "could you update the shipping total for postcode XXXX". It's a fairly normal question for me to ask, and to the best of my recollection I've never had a seller a) ignore me or b) abuse me about it - this guy is the first.

I stumbled onto this auction a few minutes before it was due to end, and there wasn't time to check this details, so I put in a slightly lower bid in case the $30 was what he expected to be paid, but also mindful that this might be another case where a figure closer to the actual postage charge might be charged, as would be in keeping in line with eBay's policy on these things.

So don't go judging me for wanting to renege on a sale because of a high postage charge…no no no…I'm considering reneging on the sale because the seller has acted like an a** to a buyer trying to make a reasonable request and being ignored then abused in reply. There's a difference…

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  • +88

    Just take the answer as a "no" on your request.
    Was pretty rude, but just ignore that.

    You were the winning bidder on an auction, so the price, including postage, is now final.

    • +42

      This.

      The seller stated the postage price in the listing. While they may not have handled it well, buyers trying to negotiate terms after purchase are a pain. You ignored the fact that the seller was clearly telling you that the postage was $30 and then sent an inflammatory message to him. Not sure what you were expecting.

      When I used to sell, I had a fairly flat postage rate - some people got a bargain, some people paid a bit extra, but these were the terms. No one was forcing anyone to buy anything.

      Just pay it and don't be a dick.

      • +13

        Yep. This

        I ABSOLUTELY (profanity) HATE when buyers turn around and ask for postage discount. This isn't Scumtree, so don't bid on the item if you aren't happy with the postage price

        I don't blame the seller for getting pissy with you though I don't think he should have been so rude. We aren't all running ebay stores and don't have time to answer silly questions. I do find the easiest option is to simply ignore those kind of questions from buyers and assume they'll go away

        • +6

          it's postage + handling fee

          not Aust post fee in general.

        • True. I take buyers acting over smart/cunning when they send cunning email like this, once an item is purchased by them in bidding.
          Dont get OP's point of ignoring what seller should do and not what he should have done. Seller might have got too many people not paying and starting conversation like this.

          Pay and move on….

        • @edgar28: Yes, it's f'ing annoying when people don't realise this! It can take an adult up to 20 minutes to fulfill some of our eBay orders. That's $10 in handling costs alone.

        • While I agree that OP has no right to renegotiate postage after the fact, I appreciate that it's very unpleasant dealing with people who are unnecessarily rude and uncivil.

          Similar situation: Years ago I accidentally bid in an eBay auction on a single ticket to Les Mis. I thought the listing included 2 tickets because of the price - the seller was a regular Joe, not a scalper. Completely my fault. But I still needed 2 tickets. So I sent the seller a message asking if he had another ticket to sell and otherwise if he wouldn't mind offering it to the next highest bidder and if it was accepted at that price I would pay the difference. Seller replied brusquely, said no and demanded penalty monies he wasn't entitled to / out of pocket for. I was so incensed I stopped communicating with him and went through the usual eBay processes for cancellation so he got his listing fee back etc.

          Funnily enough, years later the seller ended up working for me (I only found out because he remembered my full name - it's unique - and he brought it up in conversation one day). Small world. We're friends now.

    • +1

      couldn't be more true.
      I buy and sell quite often on eBay, I even like to think I'm the person responsible for eBay extending their buyers warranty period to something like 6 months, it was a lengthy process with ACCC and eBay.
      anyways, I had a buyer asking for a refund for postage difference after I send them the item. mind you, it was something like tens of cents.
      it's a pain in the butt and the lady pretend to be an 'expert' on this and never had any issues with such request.
      can't blame the seller for ignoring your request. If the same thing happens to me again, I'll just offer to cancel the transaction rather than going through a lengthy conversation and not to mention potentially negative feedback you'd get.
      btw, if you do get a negative feedback because of this, you can ask ebay to remove them (as long as you do everything in line with ebay policy and communication exhanges).

      • +1

        Sellers cannot leave buyers with negative/neutral feedback.

  • +68

    Do the right thing and pay for the item, that was seller fee for postage. If you were not happy should not have bid you wasting sellers time and yours. Sorry that just the way I see it.

    • +13

      The OP complaint is about rude communication, and has right not to be happy when the seller ignores his messages and responds in abusive way.

      Last year I ordered a $80 item from eBay, shipping from US, and I paid high shipping charges as listed by eBay. A few days letter the seller credited by PayPal with $20 and explained that eBay calculates overseas shipping charges excessively, the item was not heavy, and shipping costed him $20 less. So, supatight, if you accept it, you will be getting it - shovels of it, actually.

      • +2

        Hey Derek,

        Yeah I've noticed when listing items to be sold locally (i.e. Australia) that even then eBay's auto postage calculator often over-estimates the cost of shipping, and requires me to manually override the amount (or method) to better reflect what the actual cost will be.

        • +3

          And also overestimates the time frames of Australia Post too. 3 days for interstate? Good luck

        • +2

          @ruddiger7: i think you mean under estimates >_<

        • @ruddiger7: It certainly overestimates their delivery capabilities.

    • +19

      He wasted more time writing 2 abusive messages than writing a single message saying "I can't do that, sorry".

      • +3

        Thanks for understanding my point.

  • +40

    Sounds like they're padding out additional income with a very high postage cost (not that we know what the item is).

    That being said, you've come across as difficult messaging them multiple times. At the end of the day, you should have asked that question before bidding but you did agree to pay that when you bid.

    • +3

      Well there is not much advantage since Ebay also charges fees on postage collected. The only advantage would be is if someone does a quick browse and see an initial cheaper amount.

      Also we aren't sure if the $30 is standard mail, it could be a courier.

      • It was a bid though, so likely an auction. Basically it gives them a bit more margin to work with in this case. That's the advantage.

      • +1

        The $30 is for standard postage with AP.

        • +1

          ? Last time i checked a 3kg satchel costs less than $15 to send

        • +2

          @shapers: Yes, $13.80 at the moment (seems to go up fairly regularly with AP).

        • +3

          @dm01: Although i agree with others that you shouldnt have bid if you didnt like the shipping costs - heres a guide

        • @shapers: Shipping cost was accounted for in my bid…it's the poor treatment making me have second thoughts.

        • @dm01: It used to be $13.40… bastards.

        • @FeRGan: I'm sure they've only raised it because their service has improved a corresponding amount…

        • @dm01: Are you being facetious?

        • @FeRGan: Completely. My local PO is hopeless.

        • @shapers: Easily takes me 20 minutes to drive to the posties, fulfill the order and drive home. Worth $15 to me, easily.

        • @btst7000: Good point, I must have it easy with 3 post offices within 5 minutes of me lol (though I still use sendle which come and pick it up from my house anyway)

      • +1

        Seller charging $30.00 for postage that would cost $20 at most is just transferring an extra 10 bucks onto the price of the item. That's pretty scungy if you ask me. Ebay taking a cut of the postage as fees is also pretty scungy. I remember the good ol' days when ebay actually had people selling stuff, rather than a whole lot of businesses selling through ebay, with thousands of listings for the same stuff at retail (or close to it) prices. I'm getting old and angry!

        • it might take the seller to travel 10km away to a courier service , hence the extra 10 dollars for his time to pack and send (handling fee) ……. plus reply email

        • +1

          It's 'Postage + Handling', i think you forget the handling part

    • +7

      Its called Postage and Handling. The time of seller handling the item to Auspost is not for free, im sure your time and fuel worth more than $10.

      • Exactly my thoughts. And I've done or myself.

  • +5
    • Yes I did come across this earlier…I will consider it, thanks.

  • +32

    Unless you made alternative postage arrangements with the seller, prior to winning the auction, then it really is up to them whether or not they want to be nice and do what you asked.

    They don't owe you much (except to deliver the item) after you paid, so whether or not the seller is rude or otherwise, isn't relevant (unfortunate, but that's life!)

    You can always leave neutral / negative feedback after the fact and/or choose never to buy from him again (that's his problem).

    • +1

      I agree.

  • +53

    If you didn't like the postage and handling costs, you shouldn't have bid on it.

    The second says I'm a "pain in the ass

    I'm getting the same vibe as that seller did. lol

    • +12

      ^^^ This
      The postage information forms part of the agreement you reached with the seller when you bid and won the auction.
      Bitching about it afterwards is pointless.
      You can try asking nicely - but when the answer is no, you need to move on.

      • +1

        Of course, although eBay's policy is that postage should actually reflect the actual price of postage and packaging - charging more than double seems a departure from this policy.

        • +4

          Yep - it pisses me off too when sellers are clearly gouging on the postage. But its just part of the price you pay so you weigh it up accordingly.
          If you think the postage is inaccurate report it to Ebay before bidding.

        • +3

          "eBay's policy is that postage should actually reflect the actual price of postage and packaging"

          Not that I agree with vastly overcharging but that policy is a joke.
          ebay expect sellers to cover only the cost of postage and packaging - but make no mention of covering the fees both they and Paypal take from that cost.

          ebay also wants sellers to sell items as cheaply as possible and send as cheaply as possible - yet then tell sellers if they don't include tracking, tough.

          ebay is contradiction central.

      • +5

        I think the point is: if you ask nicely, should you expect a nice response? Or just be be happy with no response, followed by abusive response, and accept the seller bullying you?

    • +2

      Not the P&H I object to - it's the s**ty service and abuse.

      • +2

        Yep was unnecessary but the fact that he sends you the shipping cost a couple times, I think shows that's what he expects you to pay.

      • Which you are getting because you are negotiating a postage fee after winning an auction where it was clearly listed.

        <Mod: Personal attack removed>

        • +1

          No, wasn't negotiating…I was asking is it could be sent by a different method…and then when ignored, made a comment about the high price.

          Thanks for the name-calling…you and the seller would probably get along well.

        • +2

          @dm01:

          Thanks for the name-calling…you and the seller would probably get along well.

          Plot twist, I am the seller and will now be changing it to $50

        • +3

          @Cyphar: Lol, I gave you a +1 for that!

  • +11

    The postage fee is obviously a rip off, but since you knew that before bidding, there's not much you can do about it.
    I'm not surprised he insists on the postage fee. Of course he did that on purpose, and now that he sold it anyway, there's no reason for him to give you a discount.

    He surely could have said that in a more polite way, but it doesn't really make a difference :(

    Sucks, but that's how it is now.

    • +1

      Yes I agree.

      I've bought quite a few items this year where a seller has over-estimated postage with a round figure, but then revised that down based on my postcode during checkout, or have refunded the difference once they've posted it and know the final fee.

      I'm surprised that with a platform that features such a prominent feedback system (and that favours buyers no less), a seller would simply not bother replying to a polite question from the buyer, and then get abusive when challenged about this lack of communication.

  • +1

    What was the dollar value of the actual item?

    • ~$150

      Should that matter? They're not insuring it.

      • +1

        The cost of the extra postage as a percentage of the item you purchased.

        Basically the extra $10 postage wasn't exorbitant for the value of the item.

        • More like an extra $15, so 10% of the value.

          So if I was buying $2000 computer, an additional $200 on top of the actual postage cost would be about right?

        • +8

          @dm01:

          Debate it all you want, it doesn't matter, you placed your bid and won. Enough reminders come up when you bid, saying you're entering into a legal contract. That doesn't mean you can choose to object to something after the fact.

          Be an adult, agree that you messed up, and pay the seller. They've done nothing wrong, they haven't moved the goalposts on you.

        • -1

          @Spackbace: I'm not trying to debate it…I'm trying to understand your logic(?)…

        • +4

          @dm01: we are trying to understand yours

        • +1

          @altomic: Sorry, I'll clarify. Politely contacted seller to request a different postage container (pre-paid satchel) to whatever box or container they were going to use. Got ignored, then questioned their fee, and got abused. Now hesitant to proceed with sale because of abusive messages from someone I'm supposed to send my money to.

          Could you explain your 10% surcharge thingy now?

        • +6

          @dm01: I get it now. Pay the seller for the item and terms you agreed to.

        • -4

          @altomic: "terms you agreed to" - did he agree to being ignored, and later abused by the seller? Oh, now I get it: if someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also.

        • @derek324: front hand or back hand Tyrell?

        • @altomic: Was going to, then got abused.

        • -1

          @Spackbace: Lol. Not sure what OP is trying to prove or want to gather some sympathy. I take his actions totally inappropriate after he wont the auction and trying to negotiate afterwards.
          I have seen this by many people on Gumtree. After they agree to pay an amount and when you meet them, they will politely say, oh I am a bit short of cash, or normally item should shall at X amount or other useless reasons which seems good and reasonable to them, but not to seller.

        • @altomic:

          He didn't agree to be abused.

  • -7

    might have been better to have asked for a better postage quote, otherwise cancel the sale. Some sellers ask too much for postage, i had a case where the seller was asking 20$ to post out 2 dvd cased games. Asked the seller for a better quote, didn't budge explaining he/she was factoring in time/petrol to go the post office. told to can the sale.

    • +21

      As an eBay seller people like you frustrate me a lot, I always offer free postage as I am a top rated seller so it doesn't affect me. But the amount of buyers who bid on items or even purchase buy it now items and then refuse to pay or want to re-negotiate is ridiculous.

      You knew how much the seller wanted for postage before you purchased and who knows, they might have had to drive 50km's to the post office to post them.

      Some sellers may factor some of the items cost into the postage, which is a silly thing to do but why should they sell the item to you for a lower price than you agreed? Just remember that whoever you outbid by $1 or $5 was more than happy to pay that amount for it.

    • +2

      If you are going to do that you need to do it before bidding on the item well before it finishes, there's no point winning an item then trying to ask for a different postage price when the price was originally stated in the auction previously.

    • +1

      You are exactly why I have cut down selling on eBay - for every two reasonable winner bidders there's the one assh*le who once it's all finished suddenly is all for renegotiation.

      The usuals;
      - Can you post for $x (well, no I specified how much it was going to cost)
      - I'm a bit short, would you take $x. (But there are other bidders who were going to pay more)
      - Can you post to [international country]. (The item is quite clear only post to AU)
      - Can I pay in x weeks? (<s>Yeah, I'll just keep this stuff hanging around waiting for u…</s>)

      Hey, don't get me wrong - I've dealt with several crappy sellers too, but once you've 'won', you've committed to whatever price/conditions stated in the auction.

  • +15

    maybe the seller is tired of buyers turning around after purchasing and saying - "I want it done differently, why aren't you doing it that way? even though I agreed to your terms"

    • -1

      Of course, my first message wasn't stating "I want it done differently", but rather asking, "Could it be done this way?", which they ignored. And asking for something to be sent in a pre-paid satchel isn't really a radical departure from "standard postage", apart from being a little quicker to pack.

      • Well they can still send it in a pre-paid satchel but still stick with the price they are giving you. It makes no difference to the price you agreed to pay when you won the auction.

        It may be cheaper but you are also paying for the handling aspect too. Time to wrap it, time to go to the post office to post it, etc.

        • +2

          Yes of course - they could agree to post in a satchel, but still charge the same amount even if the satchel costs less. But in my experience, many sellers will tend to pass on some of the savings in that scenario. Are they obliged to? Hell no. But does everyone feel like a winner if they do? Absolutely yes. Do I expect every seller to be like this? No. Is it unreasonable for me - the person paying this fee to the seller - to query if another method can be used, and expect that the seller will at least have the decency to reply to my query, even if it's just to refuse? No, I don't think so.

        • @dm01: why didn't you ask about postage before bidding? Surely that is best eBay practise? Why not follow it in future.

        • @mowersfourpeter: As I've stated elsewhere, I came across the auction when there were only a couple of minutes to go.

  • +9

    The postage figure in the listing was $30 for standard postage + tracking, however the item only weighs 1kg and could easily fit into a 3kg satchel, which is still tracked.

    What is it? How do you know the weight of a item you don't have? Of course it could be a iPhone or something like that but still.

    I often charge more than the listed cost for postage. If the standard 3KG bag is $17 I'll round it to $20. If you don't like it don't bid.

    I factor in my time to go to the post office, wait in line etc.

    So I use the "contact seller" option, and write, "Do you always ignore messages from your buyers?"

    Yeah, that was a mistake.

    I personally think you are being a bit of a pain…

    1) Next time contact the seller BEFORE WINNING!
    2) If you don't like the postage cost don't pay.

    • +1

      Cheers for the reply.

      I already own a copy of this item, so I know exactly how large and heavy it is ;)

      Yes I normally contact sellers before bidding with any queries like this, however I stumbled onto this auction a couple of minutes before it was ending, so there wasn't really enough time.

      Standard 3kg bag is $13.80. According to eBay's policy, the postal charge is meant to reflect the cost of postage and packaging materials. I'm happy for sellers to round up like the suggested, however rounding up from $13.80 to $30 seems a bit of a stretch, and in contradiction to eBay's selling policy.

      • +10

        if you think the postage was excessive why did you bid on it on the first place ? I only bid / order stuff if i think the purchase price AND postage are reasonable. I agree postage of $30 on a $150 item is excessive - i wouldnt have bid on this in the first place (unless it is a iphone 7 = then $180 is a real steal and in that case I would have been happy to pay $30 for the postage !).

        • -1

          I thought the P&H fee was excessive….so made my max bid correspondingly less. Asked the seller if he could ship in a pre-paid satchel (doesn't hurt to ask) - he could have politely refused and I would have paid no questions (as a reasonable person might), but instead opts for an aggressive, abusive reply. My objection is not to the P&H (factored into my bid) but to the treatment received.

        • +3

          @dm01:
          If you didn't have enough time to message the seller and weren't satisfied with the postage fee you should not have bidded.

        • @Mattwilko: …or just make the maximum bid lower to accomodate for the higher postage fee. Pretty simple.

        • @dm01:

          The listing and product belongs to the seller, he can sell it for whatever and however he likes.

          If unsure or you dislike the terms of the sale, don't bid/enter a contract, even more simpler.

        • @Ughhh: He sure can. Of course, by selling on eBay, he is agreeing to sell in accordance with their conditions and stipulations, including those governing postage charges.

          I was quite certain of the terms of the sale…doesn't mean I can't make a request to change the postage method, does it?

      • +3

        As others have stated, you don't know their circumstances.

        Maybe its a huge pain to go to the post office, either messing with their schedule, or physical location. It might cost $15 in petrol to get to their nearest post office.

        Point is you agreed to their terms, don't be a pain and ask for a discount AFTER buying!

        I stopped selling on eBay, due to people like you, way to much drama.

        • -3

          Well if the item location they've given in the listing is correct, there are three post offices within a couple of kilometres of their suburb.

          Given the number of other listings they had active, and their feedback total, they sell pretty regularly and have no trouble getting to a post office.

          I didn't ask for a discount at first - I asked for a different postage method that would could potentially leave a bit more money in both our pockets, at the expense of Aus Post.

          I might stop buying on eBay, due to sellers like (formerly) you who don't seems to understand that postage fees are supposed to reflect exactly that - it's not case of adding an extra $15 for the trouble of popping down to the PO at lunch time.

      • +2

        Just because you didn't have enough time to negotiate a price before bidding doesn't mean you should expect to negotiate it afterwards. What you are doing is making your lack of time someone else's problem. You don't get to do that in the real world unless you're the boss. The seller was rude, but so were you in attempting to renegotiate a price after already agreeing to it.

    • +4

      How do you know the weight of a item you don't have?

      Well, there's this marvelous invention called the internet. Don't know if you've heard of it, but it actually allows you to find out information without having physical access to the items in question. Pretty cool, right?

  • +4

    Some sellers(myself included) pre-purchase the satchels/stickers etc to speed up the process(ie just drop off to a depot on the way to work), the one they already have+packaging could indeed cost close to that charge or if I'm the seller I might use a premium priced service which is more costly because the courier picks it up from my home and packages it.

    You made the purchase knowing the set price, you should be willing to pay it without explanation of the cost breakdown. Maybe the seller is rude but buyers having second thoughts after happens all the time and is a pita.

    • Sure, and if that's the case, it takes all of a few moments to reply with exactly that information.

      Yes, I made the purchase knowing the set price - seeing as I'm the one paying, it should be reasonable to know the breakdown of that cost, especially when it differs significantly to other items the same size and weight sent the same way.

  • +23

    Abusive eBay seller - should I follow through with purchase

    More like "I willingly accepted the terms and now am being a pain - should I go through with purchase?" -_-

    • -2

      Cheers, I've +1'd you for speaking your mind!

  • -6

    I'm with you OP, the seller can get f*****. I'm surprised people are calling you a pain for having the audacity to not want to be price-gouged. Sure, maybe you shouldn't have bought it if you didn't like the postage cost, but that's done now, and seeing as the seller is being an (profanity) now that someone's called them on their bs, they don't deserve sympathy in my books. Do whatever works out best for you, and report / leave negative feedback if you can.

    • +7

      Agreed, a simple polite message declining to amend after the first question would have averted this.

      I'd tell him to punch it up his ring-stinger now, and report the abuse to eBay, purely on principle.

      • +5

        Lol - everyone's getting neg'd for standing up for their principles!

        • +6

          Kinda tells you a fair bit about the demographic on OzB. ;)

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