Alright
So we've got this De'Longhi Portable Oil Column Heater. Sounds like something from a fancy Italian coffee shop.
They're banging on about it being portable with an exclusive additional fan. Portable? It's not a laptop; it's a heater. And an additional fan? Am I heating the room or creating a wind tunnel? I just want warmth, not a weather system in my living room.
The fins apparently incorporate thermal slots to increase heat distribution. It's like they're turning a heater into a radiator. I just want it to warm me up, not turn into a heating engineer.
Now, you can program the daily working time in 15-minute increments. Why do I need 15-minute increments? I just want to turn it on and not freeze, not schedule my heating like it's a business meeting.
Safety features galore – low surface temperature, safety tilt switch, thermal cut-off, anti-frost function. Are we launching a rocket or heating a room? It's a heater, not a safety manual.
And get this, it's got rounded edges with no sharp corners. Are we heating a room or childproofing it? I just want warmth, not a lesson in baby-proof design.
They mention easy movement with pre-assembled snap lock castors. Castors? It's not a piece of furniture; it's a heater. And a cool touch handle for carrying it from room to room? It's not a pet; I just want to warm my toes without breaking a sweat.
Anyway if you want a heater with all the bells and whistles, this De'Longhi thing might be your warm embrace. As for me, I just want a heater that heats without turning into a home improvement project.
I had one of these in my old shitty cold rental.
You are better off burning $20 notes directly, at least you get a high off that.