Me and My Housing Dilemma

The Araldited Wallet on 01/05/2022 - 13:16

Well it’s been an interesting couple of years.

I went from being married with two teenage kids a couple of cats and no mortgage, to single, then in a relationship with someone I thought would be around forever, to single again - that was tough at 58, let me tell you. I sold the house in late 2019 to share proceeds with the ex, and moved into a studio attached to a mates house. I’m still here, the price of properties on the Sunshine Coast have gone through the roof, and my ex has bought a place 100km away, the kids and my cat live with her (of course I pay for their care). We all get on great - the cat still recognises me - and the kids occasionally come and stay with me (one at a time because that’s all that will fit) but my renter is tiny and they don’t feel that relaxed knowing it’s essentially someone else’s home.

I have nearly half a million in cash and a share portfolio that floats around 70k. I have an 80+K job which is secure, and yeah, I want to buy my own house, but I can’t even look at a place now without being overrun by people putting in much bigger offers for houses that in 2019 wouldn’t have been looked at for $150k less. It’s crazy!

My point. I’m now 59. Still in great health, although my office job is trying to turn me into a blob, and I’m lonely, and living my mates house -he’s a great bloke and there’s no pressure from him to move, but I’ve been here for nearly 18 months, and barely seeing my kids. I’m so tired of wasting my weekends looking at shitboxes in neighbourhoods I would never choose to live in, and having smug real estate agents look at me patronisingly and saying “Yeah it’s tough out there” in the same breath they tell you 7secret offers have been made for the same unrenovated cesspit that has only been on the market for hours.

I want desperately to turn the ship around but I honestly haven’t got a clue now what to do? I know there won’t be much sympathy for me but that’s not what I’m looking for.

Any genuine suggestions will of course be greatly appreciated.

Financial

Comments

  • Jimothy Wongingtons on 01/05/2022 - 13:23
    +16

    I feel bad for you mate but on the upside you’re doing a lot better then a lot of others…

    smug real estate agents

    A lot of these scumbags need a good backhanding. Basically have to do nothing but sit back in their office chair, rm Williams on the desk, YD clearance suit, leased AMG in the carpark, 3 Monday morning mimosa’s deep by 9:05am and make commission easier than ever.

    The market has gone to **** and honestly I am grateful to not be renting or looking to buy.

  • brendanm on 01/05/2022 - 13:25
    +25

    Wait until rates go up, and people can't afford the massive mortgages they have taken out at 80% of their take home pay.

    • MS Paint on 01/05/2022 - 15:41
      +5

      Rates will be going up. The market has peaked in Melbourne and on the way down. In 6-12months there will be people owing more than their property is worth. They will be under mortgage stress and desperate to sell. Fun times ahead.

  • o53djz7qTPY4der on 01/05/2022 - 13:27
    +4

    I think, if I were you, I would rent somewhere closer to the kids. Keep the money until you find a place you love - then buy.

    At least this way, you'll be comfortable and able to see your children without feeling awful.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 01/05/2022 - 13:37
      +1

      I would do that to, but even rentals are a nightmare, and there’s no security in renting. They are managed by the same agents. Charging insane prices and being offered months of payments in advance by people desperate for a roof. Landlords are making a killing raising rents 15% at a time. If you can’t pay, there’s always the car.

      All on the back of COVID migration from southern states.

      • brendanm on 01/05/2022 - 13:48
        +6

        All on the back of COVID migration from southern states.

        We should send them all back there. Traffic is terrible now as well.

  • mskeggs on 01/05/2022 - 13:31
    +15

    I'm sympathetic because it sounds like you've been a bit upended, but you need to take stock.
    Your advantage is you have a wad of cash and the ability to live cheaply, and expenses will decline further in a few years when your kids are adults.
    Buy a modest home, there are places available under $600k in the area, save for your retirement, and buy a tinny, or a tent, or whatever will appeal to your kids to spend some weekends with them enjoying yourself.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 20:20
      +1

      Thank you mskeggs 😊

      There is definitely light on the horizon, that’s for sure. We had a tinny and I have a tent. The boy (15) is good to go, but the girl (18 going on 25) is decidedly against anything remotely outdoors these days, this is a work in progress. Touring Tasmania in late winter is my trump card. Wish me luck.

      My concern is just how quickly and comprehensively I’ve been priced out of the market. It’s been a very daunting experience.

      Taking stock every day now 😊

      Thank you again.

  • rektrading on 01/05/2022 - 13:34
    +5

    59Y is the new 40Y.

    Enjoy the fruits of your labor, rent where you like to live, move when you don't like the view and fk buying a house.

  • Brodo Faggins on 01/05/2022 - 13:39
    +3

    Sometimes the "Australian dream" of 1.8 cars, 2.1 kids, 3br house, happy wife happy life - just ain't it…..

    At the end of the day RE agents are salesmen. Either you have the money to negotiate or put in a serious offer right now, or they'll keep telling you these secret offers are made behind the scenes.

    Replacing everything you said above about owning a home into renting outside your mate's place and calling it "my home" is still an option.

    That way you can focus on other things of importance to you (eg. being physically closer (both proximity/relationship wise) & spending time with your kids / finding more fulfilment in work / health & exercise / spending more focus in your investments etc).

    I know many people in your situation who used their time/money/energy on using X cash to reinvest + maintain strong family, foregoing buying a home (being ok with just renting) and not buying into the "Australian dream". (The reason that's in quotations is that it's not really a dream if you're stressed to your eyeballs about paying off the mortgage and not living a happy life, is it?)

  • wei13 on 01/05/2022 - 13:42
    +3

    Sounds like you want to be close enough to the kids - so that will limit your options for places you can be.

    Otherwise you can still buy for 500k about 200km north at Hervey Bay.

    I also think peak frenzy is over, and there will be windows of opportunity later this year.

  • oscargamer on 01/05/2022 - 13:46
    +4

    If you can sit it out for the next 12-24 months, hopefully the housing market will begin to reflect reality….Good luck regardless.

  • kermi on 01/05/2022 - 14:25
    +2

    The market here is insane. My eldest just secured a rental in Brisbane with a mate and that is exhorbitant for the tiny box it is.
    I fear for our kids wanting to buy in the future.
    I hope things work out and you find a decent agent who'll keep an ear out for you.

  • Quantumcat on 01/05/2022 - 14:34
    +5

    An idea - find out where your kids want to go to uni, and buy a house there. Maybe you can have them live with you while they go to uni, and you'll get back the couple of years with your kids you're missing out on now. You can rent it out until then.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 20:08
      +1

      Yep… trying to organise that. Daughter looking to go to USC. They are already on board with the idea.

  • AustriaBargain on 01/05/2022 - 14:41

    You could rent and just invest your money somewhere else.

  • p1 ama on 01/05/2022 - 14:58
    +5

    You sound like you've been through a lot, but also sounds like you're trekking along well and have a good relationship with your kids and a good enough relationship with your ex-wife. At the end of the day, this is what matters most when relationships / families break down. I've seen enough bitter break-ups amongst my friends and family that just drive what are otherwise great people into really bad situations.

    As for the house situation, it is what it is. You're in a better position than most. You have generous savings, a stable job, no reason why you can't afford a house. No idea where you're looking on the Sunshine Coast, but the median price for a 3BR house in Maroochydore is in the high 800's, which you can easily afford with your savings and income.

    Someone before has said it better than me, but we've almost built up this cult-like following of a life where everyone has a 4BR house with a white picket fence, 2.5 kids, 2 dogs and 3 SUVs, but is that even a good and enjoyable way to live life? The truth (at least IMHO) is that we've grown tremendously with our technology, but we've not adjusted our desires to match modern society.

    I remember back in the late 80's, early 90's, my family car had no aircon, was a genuine shitbox and I couldn't last more than 15 mins sitting inside during summer. Likewise, without mobile internet, train rides were completely unproductive. People needed to live close to the city to make up for these things. But now that I WFH a few days a week, train rides are pretty productive with fast internet tethered from my phone, and driving is comfortable when I want to drive, I can live an hour away from the city and be even happier and more productive than someone living 15 mins from the city was in the late 80s. Maybe we just need to update our expectations and wants to match the progress we've made in making the world a better place to live.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 19:57
      +2

      Thank you so much for the kind, and very considered reply. It’s really heartwarming to have people I’ll never meet relate to my situation in this way. A bit overwhelming actually.
      I’ve worked really hard doing just this. Trying to manage expectations but still have hope for the life I want to live rather than have one I feel like I’m forced to live for now. So many variables, and honestly some days I feel like throwing all of my possessions in a skip and hitting the road. Then a minute later I remember how fortunate I am, and get back to the job at hand… being patient, and optimistic, and gracious, working through the steps.

  • EightImmortals on 01/05/2022 - 15:01
    +2

    Yeah we were kinda looking at houses recently, in the end we figured '***k it' and we'll probably just buy some land and build. The pricing wasn't 'that' much difference.

  • RotundPolarBear on 01/05/2022 - 15:53
    +12

    As an older single guy, just buy a small apartment outright somewhere nice and invest the rest. It gives you somewhere low maintenance to live when you're retired.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 20:05

      That’s my plan.

      Even unit prices have gone through the roof lately, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about organising a $300k mortgage to buy just before an overheated market heads into correction. If anyone can find a decent two bedder on the Sunny Coast for around $500k I’ll be all ears after I pick myself up off the floor.

  • barge-in hunter on 01/05/2022 - 17:14
    +1

    Have you considered investing in real estate?

    Rent a small apartment half way between work and the kids, while your money is making a return (or paying off the rest of the mortgage much faster) with a positively geared property in a place you hope to retire to.

    Caveat - it'll take some careful maths to make sure you don't overcommit, but I think it's worth looking into.

  • Ocker on 01/05/2022 - 17:26
    +4

    Just buy a one or two bedroom unit/apt local to where you are now
    Then, when you want to see the kids for a few days rent an AirBnB close to where they are. The rental cost will drop off as and when the kids get older and go their own way.

  • 1 Sec on 01/05/2022 - 21:37
    +1

    Tim? 😅

  • WreckTangle on 02/05/2022 - 07:56
    +2

    What happened to the other cat?

    • Roladude on 02/05/2022 - 08:45
      +3

      I too am interested in mystery of the second cat.

      • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 19:30
        +2

        Haha… sorry for the lack of detail surrounding the pussos. The original two are still very much alive and very happily living with my ex and the kids. My landlord/mate isn’t a fan of cats and I work long hours so the black beast is much better off where he is for now. Happy there with the kids and his bro cat - and they have a dog now too, who despite his disctinct weight, height and reach advantage still comes in at number three in the pecking order. It’s hilarious. I saw them today. My bloke is still very happy to see me, but really he is much better off where he is - and yes I pay cat support too. 😂

        • Roladude on 03/05/2022 - 09:26
          +1

          Thanks. Good to know your black beast still misses you.

  • Darayus on 02/05/2022 - 10:48
    +1

    Mate you have enough fund to move overseas either Thailand / Indonesia or Philipines and stay there like a king. Do some odd work or consultancy locally and keep yourselves busy.

    There is no need to live like a pauper and sink into depression for not having your own house.

    that my view mate.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 19:39
      +1

      Hey mate, thank you. I have been to Thailand and Sri Lanka, and Bali. It would be amazing to live in either of those places, but I couldn’t live so far away from my kids. 100km is already too far.

  • Sensiekatie on 02/05/2022 - 11:36
    +2

    Have you thought about over 50 or 55's living. There are a lot of people who go to work in these, so not all older people. Some are rip offs but there are a few around now that have some vital differences:
    1) property price rises go to you (not them)
    2) no exit fees
    3) you are in charge of the sale when you leave
    4) plain English contracts
    And a few other benefits.

    Yes some of these are so crowded and close together as well as small. Some are not like that. We went to one in Caloundra to deliver a clock. I think that was a Halycon. Inside it looked and felt spacious (unlike my mother's which was very small). The neighbours were not too close to each other. Their place was 3 bedroom plus a spacious study, a proper garage and even a decent enough shed. Kitchen dining and lounge was quite spacious and modern with outdoor area and lawn.

    The right one would have access to appropriate activities when you finally retire.

    • morse on 02/05/2022 - 12:51
      +1

      You also have to watch out that these places don’t insist you get repairs done by contracted suppliers which are ridiculously overpriced.

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 19:59

      Yeah… good idea. There’s a Gemlife one not far from where I live now. I’ll check it out. Thank you.

  • hueylewis on 02/05/2022 - 14:47
    +1

    https://www.pdfdrive.com/how-i-found-freedom-in-an-unfree-wo…

    this has changed a lot of people's lives for the better.

    how i found freedom in an unfree world. harry browne. free pdf, no sign ups.

  • brad1-8tsi on 02/05/2022 - 15:27
    +1

    $500k invested conservatively will get you $25k in franked dividends. The 30% franking credit should cover the tax payable. The dividends will also add to your taxable income which may increase your child support payment.

    Will $480/week plus something from your salary get you a 2 bedroom place somewhere?

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 19:24

      $500k is sitting in the bank - yeah I know. Stocks haven’t exactly been the great investment I thought they would be even though I jumped in at the bottom in 2020. Poor choices and bad timing of some transactions have gutted the wins. Truthfully, I didn’t know what I was doing. So I haven’t had the courage to commit any further. It’s been a. Bumpy ride, and every time I get somewhere near my starting position the arse drops out of it. I’m keen to know more, but working 45-50 hours means not having the time to manage things on a day-to-day basis.

  • MarsTitan on 02/05/2022 - 16:10
    +1

    Labor has just announced equity-sharing scheme and it may apply to you (earning less than 90K).

    https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-05-01/labor-affordable-hous…

    • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 20:31

      Sorry mate, but when I hear the words “Labor” and “scheme” used in the same sentence I get a little nervous 😬. I’m a political agnostic BTW.

      Seriously though, it’ll be worth a look at the fine print to see how they deal with capital gains etc. Thanks for the heads up 👍🏼

  • ECE on 02/05/2022 - 20:02
    +1

    Enjoy your life while you can.
    Goodluck at least you still have yourself 💪🏿

  • The Araldited Wallet on 02/05/2022 - 20:22

    Thank you everyone for the kindness and consideration. Bless you all 🙏🏼

  • foxinsox8 on 02/05/2022 - 21:02

    It sounds to me that despite all the turmoil that you have been through you are going pretty well personally (your attitude in particular) so there is that. In fact for a 59 year old my biggest concern out of everything you mention is the office job and its health effects. I agree. When I was made redundant 2 years ago at 58, I swore I wouldn't have another job sitting down. This has made a huge difference to my health. In the end that is all your kids care about. That you are around and you are well.
    They also probably care less than you think about your living arrangements. My suggestion is to wait for the market to cool: it will significantly over the next 2 years. While you are waiting for that to happen book a few weekends for yourself and both children at a beachfront house or apartment. It will be money well spent, and you'll still be ahead by not buying at the top of a prolonged hot market. You'll spend happy weekends as a family rather than pitiful ones in the company of real estate salesliars. All the best

  • Choc0 on 03/05/2022 - 09:45
    +1

    I'd recommend you bide your time and sink the cash into a PPOR, as the tax treatment of it is favourable, where as you get penalised for cash in the bank when it comes to means testing. You should be able to comfortably afford the PPOR given your circumstances.

    Having a space to call your own will do wonders for your mental health too. All the best.

Login or Join to leave a comment
Login Join