The Mind of a Party at Fault for Car Accident

TL;DR: Got rear-ended, the other party refused to even acknowledge he did anything wrong.

I had the most surreal thing happen to me lately.

Busy big city intersection, I am waiting the first one in line on a red light to turn right. The road is at a slight decline. Green light for people GOING FORWARD lights up, and suddenly the car previously waiting behind me bumps into the rear of my car. the RIGHT TURN light is still red.

Oh well, I get out of my car, and trying my best to hide my annoyance at the situation, ask the other driver what happened. In return, I hear:
Him: "What do you mean mate, you drove into me".
My mind suddenly does a back flip, thinking about the whole situation. I was stationary, in neutral gear. The light was red. The road was at an incline and the other party was uphill from me.
Me: "What? How do you mean mate? As in I reverses into you?"
Him: "Dunno mate, but you did this."
Me: "Uphill?!"
Him: "Mate, not my fault. There's hardly any damage anyway"
I look at contact point between our cars, still touching each other. His car is indeed not really jammed into my rear bumper, yet still there is definitely a firm contact between the two, and there are definitely scratch marks there.
Me: "Ok mate, whatever, our insurance companies will sort this out. What are your details"
Him: "It wasnt me, I can exchange details but it wasnt me, you did this"
The person I was driving with starts to suggest that maybe we should get the Police involved, if this carries on. The guy suddenly gets all offended by the notion that I am considering calling a Police, and goes like:
Him: "Stop claiming that I am avoiding sharing my details. I am willing to share them, but I did not do this"
Me: "Whatever mate, I`ll need your licence card and insurance policy no."
After exchange, we drove our separate ways.

Few hours later, long after I have lodged a claim with my insurer, I suddenly start to think "How could I unknowingly put the reverse gear in and release the clutch without remembering it?! Or maybe I have started reversing into him uphill, regardless of common logic of waiting for a green light to turn?! WTF is my mind doing to me…".

Now, obviously it was some sort of a mind game tactic to play down the whole event, so that I would consider this to be not worth acting on, but it has gotten more and more interesting to me, what must be going through such peoples' minds in these situations? Lack of common decency was obvious, but acting in a way, where I could almost be convinced he believed it himself… Quite commendable, considering the circumstances.

Poll Options expired

  • 114
    People are rats, deal with it
  • 5
    He was obviously right, you sick sick puppy
  • 2
    The thrill of possibility of avoiding responsibility was just too strong to resist...
  • 3
    Don`t drink and drive

Comments

  • +11

    TLDR - OP got rear ended whilst stopped and other party refused accept responsibility

    • +2

      In a nutshell, yes ;)

      • +4

        you probably don't read news or watch ABC 2pm question time. Pollies pulling that craps all the time and people still voted for them.

        • +1

          I do try to stay away from minor news about politics. I have an allergy to being treated like a mushroom :P

    • +13

      Some people rightly or wrongly are under the impression they shouldn't accept responsibility for an accident for legal/insurance reasons.

      • +1

        It is quite amusing to me, since in the end it will just be 2 insurance companies dunking it out between each other, with little-no input from us. Unless he admitted on a video that he was 100% sure he was at fault, nothing he would do would hold any merit. Unless in some bizzare alternate universe I back up uphill into him for shits and giggles, and he has that on a video, the fault is always on the party in the back.

        • +2

          Unless he admitted on a video that he was 100% sure he was at fault

          Can't recall specifics, but vaguely remember something along the lines that anything said by a party in the immediate aftermath of an accident being inadmissible/non-binding/whatever?

          Think it was NSW.

          • +2

            @djkelly69: Insurance works under the law of subrogation, which is when the insurer pays the insured out and then assumes all legal entitlements (of the insured). If you, as the insured admits liability, this may adversely affect your insurer's entitlements (after they have paid you) … some policies may make your insurance cover voidable where you admit liability.

            Fwiw, if you are in NSW< Legal Aid suggests "It is usually a term of your insurance not to admit any responsibility for either the accident or the extent of the damage caused:" per link

            https://www.legalaid.nsw.gov.au/publications/factsheets-and-…

            • @TheMindsetTraveller: This… "some policies may make your insurance cover voidable where you admit liability".
              It is hard to remain calm and civil and remember what you should do when you are involved in an accident but say as little as possible and don't apologise, even if you were clearly in the wrong.
              Exchange details and move on.

            • +1

              @TheMindsetTraveller: If I was at fault, I'd find it very hard to not at least say sorry mate.

              How does a convo go where you don't admit fault?

              • +1

                @kiitos: I guess we are human after all and do apologise (when we are the ones who made a mistake) because it is the right thing.

                It is harder because we, as drivers, rarely get into accidents and deal with these incidents differently. I would probably say something like 'Hey I'm sorry mate, are you OK?'. If there were any direct questions like "hey its your fault, aren't you looking, why did you crash into me rar ra ra", I would be like "lets just exchange details and let our (or my) insurance deal with it".

                My last accident was 8 years ago, so I'm not much of a source here, but I remember the other driver (who was clearly at fault), jumping out of the car and started yelling at me that it was my fault rar rar and the first response I had was like "are you OK? are you hurt?" . I was more worried because I had hit him on his drivers door, about 45degrees, as he was coming out of a parked lane (and I was in the moving lane). He even told the police I was speeding, and I told the police , i disputed the speeding part, but even if i was, he saw me coming (remember he saw me speeding) yet he still decided to pull out of from the kerb and into my lane.

      • In NSW, Legal Aid suggests "you should discuss the accident with your insurer before you admit responsibility", see the link below. Fault can be a complex issue; it could be apportioned even where you might believe that you are 100% not-at-fault.

        https://www.legalaid.nsw.gov.au/publications/factsheets-and-…

  • -7

    If your car accident was a relationship, it would be extremely toxic!!

  • -2

    “Insurance policy number” lol

    • Cheers for the negs. It’s not a requirement to give this info and more to the point who the phuck would know it

  • +5

    Mans tried gaslighting you

    • Is that what an attempt at an inception is? :)

      • +8

        Gaslight: manipulate (someone) by psychological means into doubting their own sanity.

        • Feels like that was exactly what he was going for. Thanks for pitching a correct name for it mate :)

  • +2

    1WORD: DASHCAM

    • Had one in my old car, got this one 3 months ago, and dragged my feet about re-installing it. Guess it serves me right now.

      • -1

        Dash cam wouldn't work if he was hit from behind

        • -1

          Maybe OP’s reversing camera caught it :)

        • +12

          Lots of people have both front and rear.

          A front-only cam would still show that the vehicle was stationary when it was hit from behind.

      • +4

        A front DC would at least prove you were not reversing.

  • +4

    People change their alternate facts when you tell them that it was recorded on dash cam.

    • I was wondering for a sec if I should try a gambit like that (did not carry it over into this car from the previous one just yet), but was also considering a scenario where he would get aggressive after learning that.

      • I usually point out the camera to them and tell them that it's still recording and has therefore recorded them being aggressive.

        • Do they calm down at that point?

          • +1

            @Greem85: Dashcam Owners Australia would show you plenty of times they don't :)

    • +2

      Nah, I had a taxi driver (Hire car) and his wife put in a stat dec each that I broke double lines to side swipe their car.

      I bloody warned him I had a front and rear dash cam.

      Anyway, it seems he got done for fraud in the end.

    • +1

      I'd like a dash cam on my head when I'm out in the Wild West shops. A grumpy old lady rammed me with her trolley the other day and then accused me of walking into her!

  • Would have been funny if the police were involved and heard the story.

  • -1

    What a nutter. Did he look dodgy?

    • +4

      His behaviour was dodgy af. As for the looks, imagine 55-60yrs old tradie of a non-anglo-saxon heritage ;)

      • -1

        So potentially a boomer too. Enough to arrest on the spot jks.

        Glad you got his details as sometimes there's damage that's unseen.

        It should be reason enough to get a front and back dash cam.

  • +2

    The car behind you, sounds like something a Pam would do.

    You don’t happen to be a security guard? /s

    • +3

      security guard “officer”

    • No ;)
      What's a Pam?

      • +2

        What's a Pam?
        Member Since
        11/09/2016

        Srsly?

        In any incident where Pam stuffs up and blames the 3rd party. Pam would blame shift (typically involves yelling) to make it the other person’s fault and escalates the situation.

        • Oh, you mean a Karen? :)

          • +2

            @Greem85: Pam is a variant of Karen. The active variant on OzB, it spreads…

        • Srsly?

          I had to search to find out who Pam is?
          Even then I don't know why Pam is Pam LOL

      • +1

        It's hellopam2019. She's changed her username but essentially life and everyone is against her, mainly because she makes bad choices. I've tried to help but it is challenging…

        • I've tried to help but it is challenging…

          if OPM can't help we are doomed!

      • +1

        Signs up for Astra Zeneca and other COVID trials but doesn't want to get the Astra Zeneca vaccine.

        • +1

          I missed this bit of lore.

          • +4
            • +1

              @SF3: This line is amazing considering all the past posts

              Us older people are discriminated against so we have to make our own wise decisions based on years of experience.

              • +1

                @Caped Baldy: Yes, a strong case of “Ipse Dixit” is a common pattern.

  • +1

    I was sitting at a red light one day and the car in front of me started reversing. For no reason. He drives into my front bumper. Bump. He had a nice car and mine at the time was a piece of crap.

    This old dude gets out of his car and starts yelling at me with abuse. I sit calmly and as he approaches (not going to exit my vehicle when someone is looking for a fight) I just point at the dash cam and tell him it is all recorded.

    He calms down right away. I exit the vehicle and see there is no damage to either vehicle. It was just a small bump - no biggie. We go on with our day. If anything came of it I just saved the video.

    So yeah people are crazy and always have a dash cam. It’s saved me a few times.

    • +1

      wow I believe it. The amount of times I've been verbally abused for something someone else does on the road. When you point to the dash cam its the exact same reaction people have when they realise you're sitting in your parked car in a supermarket car park and they're about to swing open their door right into you. Surprise !

  • +1

    Old mate took a leaf out of the LNP's playbook

  • +1

    I had someone pull out from the kerb while I was in their blind spot, and they collided with me. After inspecting the damage, I went to move my car from the roadway to the parking lane. As I get back in my car, the other fellow yells at me "You'd better not be driving off"?!?

    The interaction was otherwise fine, and he admitted liability to his insurer, but why would I drive off from an accident I wasn't at fault of without having exchanged details?

  • +1

    Rubbish, of course you would not put the vehicle in reverse. It's your mind thinking too much. Get that out of your head, bc soon enough, you will be talking to the insurer expressing doubts, well, maybe, I don't know, it's all too confusing, can I have a drink of water, ok ok I confess, what was it again, oh yes, I reversed into the other car….

    Mind your Mind!

  • +1

    Rule number 1: never admit fault even if you are at fault.

    • Or, repeatedly yell: "I am not at fault. It was you, mate.", which makes you look even more guilty.

      • Nah yel, "I deny everything!"

  • This definitely wouldn't be their first time, I bet they have done this before and were caught admitting fault via audio/video recording which meant they couldn't go back on their word after they went back home.

    So their new tactic is to just deny straight away.

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