Advice Needed - Manager with Poor Personal Hygiene and Leaves Food to Rot in Communal Fridge

Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 13:56
Last edited 18/01/2018 - 14:25 by 1 other user

I need some advice. I work with in a small shared office with several staff members and my manager, who is abrupt, unapproachable, with anger issues, thinks she's the centre of the universe, oblivious to anything that doesn't involve her.

1) She lacks personal hygiene, lets be blunt, she stinks. Cannot figure out what the smell is but it definitely comes from her. The best way I can describe it is rotten egg x pee x halitosis. We tried giving some subtle hints but didn't work.

2) She leaves food/leftover lunch in the communal fridge, until it starts to stink and rot. I usually throw the mouldy food out because it's disgusting, but I'm sick of having to clean up after her!

Please suggest ways to make my work life more bearable!

Thanks in advance.

Education & Work

Comments

  • onetwothreefour on 18/01/2018 - 13:57
    +54

    Get a new job. There's no changing some people.

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 14:38

      Seems like the easiest option at the moment!!

      • payton on 18/01/2018 - 15:05

        Does the manager have a director/area manager/owner/franchise head office she reports to?

        • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 16:15

          Yes there is.. but seems crazy to get the boss's boss to deal with her filthy habits. Also don't want my name on record making a complain about her, if that makes sense?

        • payton on 18/01/2018 - 22:07
          +5

          @Redang3lz:
          As others pointed out, could be a WHS or wellbeing issue that needs to be sorted as part of the company's duty of care.
          Since you said others in the office felt the same way, perhaps an anonymous hint/tip to whoever is higher up?

        • [Deactivated] on 19/01/2018 - 20:55
          +1

          @Redang3lz: Well the fact that such a person has become a manager is very concerning!
          let's look at the root of the issue.
          can you guess why?

        • plastic spoon on 21/01/2018 - 03:19
          +3

          In line with @payton… Can you frame it a different way? Tell HR you're concerned about her, she's irritable and has let go of her personal hygiene, maybe HR should step in and check she's okay.

          The other thing to do is to document everything, continually.

  • gaz3342 on 18/01/2018 - 14:00
    +31

    Anonymously leave soap, shower gel, deodorant on her desk.

    For the food, implement a new procedure in which all perishable food in the fridge is thrown away every Friday afternoon, that's what we do in my office.

    Good luck.

    • Quantumcat on 18/01/2018 - 14:17
      +5

      My + is for your second suggestion

      In our fridge all food is thrown away about every two months (Tupperware containers bedamned)

      • johnno07 on 19/01/2018 - 08:16
        +5

        My addition to this rule is to not damn the Tupperware, but give the rostered fridge cleaners the option of appropriating it.

      • esty on 25/01/2018 - 08:46

        lol its every friday at my office.

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 14:41

      We thought about doing regular fridge clean outs, but it's only her stuff that's always left in there..

      • miicah on 19/01/2018 - 12:35

        Too bad for her then

      • SydStrand on 19/01/2018 - 13:38
        +9

        Give Gordon Ramsay a call

        Look at it! It's mouldy! Smell that! You disgusting pig! Ninoooo!

        • ankor on 20/01/2018 - 10:17

          Not a bad idea actually.

          Create a ghost hotmail account that sends her one video a day of this!

      • gummibear on 19/01/2018 - 15:09
        +3

        Throw it out the same day it goes in. Just don't get caught.

      • GregMonarch on 19/01/2018 - 22:35

        Ignore the food. Someone else will do it. As for the personal stink discover some other place she goes. Then think of a way to leave notes that seem to be coming from someone THERE instead of work.

        e.g. She probably doesn't go to a gym but let's assume for a minute she does. You type notes and post them from a post box in a back street near that place but where there's no store cameras just in case. Change it often too. Notes just state facts:

        • Most people stink AFTER leaving the gym. You stink BEFORE you get there. Do something about it. (Demands it - don't say please - it puts her in power.)
        • Your breath stinks. Brush your teeth a few times a day AND scrape your tongue.
        • You stink. Change your underwear daily, don't wear clothes more than once, and wash them each time because bacteria grows making you stink.
        • You stink. Go to a doctor. They can help.

        Include youtube links. Short ones. That talk about the problem she has.

        If that doesn't work step it up:

        • Gym members [gives the impression of a group of people] pity your poor family friends and work colleagues that have to put up with your lack of personal hygiene. YOU STINK! Wash your clothes, shower, brush your teeth AND scrape your tongue.

        Doesn't work step it up again:

        • Your breath smells like a warthog DIED in your MOUTH.
        • You're stink is DISGUSTING. Makes us want to VOMIT.

        This all throws the responsibility away from all of you. Give her someone to hate, but points out the problem loud and clear at the same time.

        If you all work with the public in any way, maybe send random notes to head office as if the writer is a customer. One in week 1, another week 3, two in week 8, one week 10, three week 15, etc. Like:

        "I was in your xyz branch the other day and… blah blah, then as she spoke I nearly gagged and threw up, pity her workmates who must really respect or are afraid of her to not say anything, is this really the face you want representing your business, etc." If she's good at her job mention that though so she doesn't get fired. It's just something that needs to be dealt with. But if she's a cow to others, a REAL cow to clients and workmates (not just you're exaggerating her flaws because you don't like her and her stink) put that in too. "While I waited I heard her being extremely rude to…"

        Hopefully it will bring on some humility before ever getting fired and she'll mention it to some of you - but more probable it will be an arrogant tone like: "If I did smell all of you would say something by now!" Then act timid and apologetic but say you all respect her and didn't want to say anything BUT - and say one thing - each - say it's not THAT bad but you have noticed but didn't want to hurt her feelings whatever. Then leave it alone so she fumes but then thinks on it. Facts. Don't lecture. Continue to use the NOTES to lecture.

        Never refer to what happened at work in them so the two can't be tied together. e.g. The food is nothing. Who cares if you have to throw it out so what. But if she starts brushing her teeth don't send a note "Good your breath is better but…" In other words think ahead. Just drop the ones she gets right. Ask can this incriminate us at work. And don't tell anyone at work you're doing it. Just shrug like, oh well that's life. Stop gossiping about it behind her back, say nothing. Note from customers have to be on different paper, printer, font, envelopes, folds, posted in different areas.

        • Redang3lz on 19/01/2018 - 23:37
          +1

          This. Is. Brilliant.

          Just need to find out where she goes after work!!

        • try2bhelpful on 20/01/2018 - 07:56
          +14

          The notes are a good way of getting you the sack for harassment if she goes to her boss with them. She may have a medical condition that causes this, for all you know. I would be very careful about how people approach this issue.

        • GregMonarch on 21/01/2018 - 22:49

          @try2bhelpful: Goes to the boss to sack a co-worker because someone from her gym sent a note!?

        • try2bhelpful on 21/01/2018 - 22:59
          +1

          @GregMonarch: If they can tie the notes back to you then you are in trouble and, unless you know her home address, then you would be sending to work which would point to a colleague. Apart from anything else you sound like a seriously disturbed individual with your level of victimisation; particulrly the thought you have put into this makes me wonder what level of harassment you have done in the past. The manager could be suffering from a physical or mental illness however you think that harassment is a way to go.

        • GregMonarch on 21/01/2018 - 23:11

          @try2bhelpful: Some people take the internet WAY too seriously. Hint: You might be one of them. Do you also think that everytime someone on here says: "Bikies", they're sticking a roll of bank notes into "Chopper's" hand?

        • try2bhelpful on 21/01/2018 - 23:15

          @GregMonarch: No but there is a lot of difference between "bikies" and the extensive screed you have gone into. You might want to take the time to reflect on what this means about your personality. You may think you are joking but there is a definite nasty edge there.

        • GregMonarch on 22/01/2018 - 02:31

          @try2bhelpful: I think people that think they are capable of doing online psychiatric assessments, should grow up and get outside more often.

        • try2bhelpful on 22/01/2018 - 10:34

          @GregMonarch: I think people who have no perpective on their own comments need to take a step back and have a good hard look at themselves. "Off" humour can work well but it needs to be very well crafted and executed and not just a rambling diatribe that just exposes the mind of the commentator. Funnily enough I do "get out" quite often which is why I know what is well constructed "humour" and what is just juvenile. Maybe you need to look closer at true wits and not just pay attention half the time.

          You may also want to consider the expression "Brevity is the soul of wit", which is why "Bikies" works as a comment but your screed doesn't.

    • AustriaBargain on 21/01/2018 - 08:41

      " implement a new procedure"

      Oh yeah managers love it when employees do that, especially when it's targeting one of their own problematic behaviours. Better to find a patsy to do it for you if possible.

  • myusername on 18/01/2018 - 14:08
    +13

    name and shame what's her name and business name and we can troll on social media

    • Savas on 18/01/2018 - 14:57
      +2

      upvoted

      • myusername on 18/01/2018 - 15:07
        +3

        personally i find this sort of behaviour absolutely appalling and disgusting.

        people that do this should be sterilized

        • dogboy on 18/01/2018 - 15:42
          +8

          Are you talking about the naming and shaming or the bad hygiene/mouldy food?

        • Halsmich on 18/01/2018 - 15:47

          @dogboy: Probably the hygiene since s/he suggested the naming and shaming

        • fantombloo on 18/01/2018 - 21:22
          +7

          @dogboy:

          I thought it was the upvoting.

        • smartazz104 on 19/01/2018 - 21:54

          sterilized

          Hyperbole or are you just stupid?

        • Save Medicare on 20/01/2018 - 00:23
          +2

          @smartazz104:

          Most of the smell is due to the activity of bacteria so sterilisation could help

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 16:19
      +1

      Wish I can!! At least the business is not associated with food..

        • aboabo on 19/01/2018 - 11:37
          +8

          No, but it could be Wendy Pong.

        • smartazz104 on 19/01/2018 - 21:54
          +1

          Funny, if you weren't living under a rock you'd see that the LNP are the ones that actually stink.

        • GregMonarch on 20/01/2018 - 01:21
          +4

          @smartazz104: They BOTH do. Australians need to concentrate their votes on a completely different group so one of those group of leeches gets put not into opposition, but out completely. THEN they might start serving the best interests of everyone else, when they know they can't just play musical chairs and take a minor pay cut when they 'lose'.

        • Bullion78 on 21/01/2018 - 00:07
          +1

          @GregMonarch:

          Astounds me how so few people see this. I cannot distinguish between the 2 parties. Both rotten and corrupt to the core.

  • bobbified on 18/01/2018 - 14:18

    my manager, who is abrupt, unapproachable, with anger issues, thinks she's the center of the universe, oblivious to anything that doesn't involve her.

    Is it just you or does everyone else think that too?

    If it's just you that thinks that, then you're the problem.
    If it's everyone, then she's the problem and you should GTFO of that company.

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 14:44
      +3

      It's definitely a shared view amongst everyone..

  • boomramada on 18/01/2018 - 14:22
    +2

    Fridge clean up day on every second Friday, everything in it goes to bin! works really well.

    • Rifraf on 18/01/2018 - 14:58
      +3

      Every second week?
      Gotta be joking.
      I wouldn't put my food in a fridge where others had been in there two weeks.

      • boomramada on 19/01/2018 - 11:09
        +5

        So your home fridge, you completely empty every week or less? I mean everything, inc cans/bottles/butter/ etc?

        • Rifraf on 20/01/2018 - 04:00

          "Food"!!!!
          Bottles and cans rarely last longer than a day or two here.
          You've got me on the butter as I'm the only one here who eats it.
          The small block (250g?) lasts me a couple of weeks.
          So yeah, I've just been downstairs for a squiz and the block of butter, which is only in the fridge in summer, is the only thing that would be in there longer than a week.

      • GregMonarch on 20/01/2018 - 01:25

        One week is too early. Two weeks is about right. A BBQ chook is still ok at 3-4 days. I recently discovered how to keep a lettuce perfect for 3 weeks going on 4.

        • Rifraf on 20/01/2018 - 04:02

          Not here.
          Cooked chook is finished the following day or binned.

        • banana365 on 21/01/2018 - 14:45

          I recently discovered how to keep a lettuce perfect for 3 weeks going on 4.

          So come on, tell us how.

        • GregMonarch on 21/01/2018 - 22:38
          +2

          @banana365: I went into a store that had them sitting in shallow water. It got me thinking so I went searching on youtube. There were all sorts of tips. Like wrapping celery in foil. Anyway, with the iceburg lettuce, I sliced off some of the browned root end, put the lettuce into a Colesworths plastic bag with a little water (just enough for the root end to sit in, but not enough to makes the leaves mush), closed the bag in around the lettuce and twisted it so there was no slack in the bag, and put it into the crisper of the fridge so the root points downwards and sits in the little bit of water. I changed the water every few days, removed another VERY thin slice, returned it back the same way. At week 3 it was still like the day I got it. At week 3.5-4 I had to break off the brown bits of each leaf.

    • TheBird on 19/01/2018 - 10:51
      +1

      We clear our fridge at work on the last working day of EACH week.

  • Donaldhump on 18/01/2018 - 14:28
    +7

    she's got BO and she's got bad breath but she's the sorta sheila for me

  • Halo375 on 18/01/2018 - 14:40
    +5

    That's just too many problems to deal with - she won't change so you really only have two options:

    1. You leave and go somewhere else
    2. You get her to leave - either being promoted elsewhere or find another job outside the company

    Any retaliation, punishment, lessons, confrontation would be a complete waste of time. Personally, I would get the hell out of there if you can - a bad manager can have a massive impact on your own physical and emotional wellbeing.

    Good luck!

    • GregMonarch on 20/01/2018 - 01:27
      +1

      LOL. Apply for other jobs in her name - leave the phone number of her head office superior's contact number for a reference.

  • cuteseal on 18/01/2018 - 14:48
    +26

    Unfortunately you only have 1 course of action. This will take some detailed planning and covert execution…

    1. Obtain laxatives
    2. Find a window of opportunity when no one else is at the fridge (possibly fake a fire drill)
    3. Put laxatives in everyone else's food in the fridge (except yours)
    4. Wait until after lunch when everyone gets hit with explosive diarrhea
    5. Pretend to be affected as well
    6. When everyone starts complaining/moaning - point out that it must be all the rotten food left in the refridgerator
    7. Initiate witch hunt which will lead to your manager
    8. Pull out the popcorn and enjoy
    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 16:21
      +8

      HAH! We had thought about a group sick day, where we all mysteriously got gastro.

      • cuteseal on 18/01/2018 - 19:44

        Great minds think alike!

    • techhead on 20/01/2018 - 15:10

      Laxettes, small chocolate squares. Unwrap them and place em in a bowl like small choccies. Nom nom nom.

  • mrkorrupt on 18/01/2018 - 14:54
    +6

    why dont you place the rotting lunch on her desk if it is marked with her name

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 14:56
      +24

      We had actually done this!! And she PUT IT BACK INTO THE FRIDGE!!!

      • orangetrain on 19/01/2018 - 08:22
        +2

        3 hour rule.

      • ruddiger7 on 19/01/2018 - 09:46
        +9

        Ask her if she is going to eat it, if she says no then ask why its in the fridge. If she says yes, then volunteer to heat it up for her.

  • Rifraf on 18/01/2018 - 14:56

    Just keep sneaking her food into her office and onto her desk.
    Simples.
    Don't tell anyone else and don't get caught.

  • whooah1979 on 18/01/2018 - 15:02
    +1

    Is the manager a hoarder?

  • gaz3342 on 18/01/2018 - 15:04
    +7

    I wonder what her house looks like.

  • [Deactivated] on 18/01/2018 - 15:04
    -6

    what nationality is she? usually its the food one eats that generates the BO

    • gaz3342 on 18/01/2018 - 15:14
      +5

      Incorrect, BO is caused by bacteria that builds up when you don't shower / wash your clothes.

      • Your Friend on 19/01/2018 - 12:07
        +4

        not completely true - indians have a strong BO because of all the curry they eat, something in their curries secretes through their skin that gives them that smell

        • Candour on 19/01/2018 - 15:03
          +4

          actually I found other races pongy when I first came to oz but I won't mention them by name. what's yours?

        • follow on 19/01/2018 - 18:16

          @Peccadilloes: Hostile

        • Candour on 19/01/2018 - 21:04

          @ZubatRingo:

          how come I get negatived but 'your friend' gets 2+? my comment was in the same vein to see if participants picked up on his negative comments which are hostile to Indians.

        • follow on 19/01/2018 - 21:19

          @Peccadilloes: why beat around the bush? He thinks Indians stink, why not add others to the pile? Go on

        • smartazz104 on 19/01/2018 - 21:56

          @Peccadilloes: Where did you come from?

        • ozbjunkie on 20/01/2018 - 04:53
          +2

          White mate of mine went to India, came back with the same smell. He reckons it's the traditional chai tea.

      • belongsinforums on 20/01/2018 - 20:32
        +1

        Not smelly sweat? Different races certainly have different degrees of bo

  • yoonibear on 18/01/2018 - 15:07
    +3

    Can it be an OH&S issue if it's rotting food in the fridge?

  • Ryanek on 18/01/2018 - 15:44
    +4

    Everyone has a boss. Contact hers.

    • Third_Gear on 18/01/2018 - 15:49
      +2

      I don't.

      • Ryanek on 18/01/2018 - 15:58
        +16

        Wait till you get married.

  • dogboy on 18/01/2018 - 15:47
    +22

    Sorting out the food issue is easy - weekly fridge cleanout on a Friday.

    The personal hygiene issue is another matter altogether. This may indicate that she is going through some personal issues and/or is depressed. I would advise contacting her manager to express concern for her mental wellbeing based on this. Trying to get the message across in passive aggressive ways will more than likely just make her feel bad and worsen her condition or turn her against the staff. It sounds to me like she has a real issue and the hygiene thing is a secondary result of this. There may also be some advice on mental health websites as to the best way to help someone in this state.

    • gaz3342 on 18/01/2018 - 15:59
      +2

      Great answer.

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 18:27
      +2

      Well, she's definitely not depressed. But your comment about personal issues is very interesting.. She's the kind of person that blurts out all her issues (both work and personal life related) out loud to whoever is listening. It's actually quite awkward because we don't want to hear about how "stupid" her boss is or how bad her cramps are etc.. Also she puts in much effort with make up and clothes to look good, so it's not like she's "stopped trying". It's all very strange, but I don't feel comfortable prying into her personal life. I've asked her if she was OK when she gets stressed, but she bombards me with quite trivial and petty comments about how the people we work with.

    • xcess on 19/01/2018 - 00:53
      +1

      She might just be lazy as hell, but hide the rotting lunches near her desk and see which smells worse

    • Candour on 19/01/2018 - 15:06

      very rational. if bosses are irrational like trump and other egomaniacs who I worked with over decades or passive aggressive they might shoot the messenger

      • GregMonarch on 20/01/2018 - 01:35
        +2

        You need to stop watching fake news.

    • ankor on 20/01/2018 - 10:20

      Wtf, we aren't supposed to put roses and marshmellows on those pitchforks mate :P

      • dogboy on 20/01/2018 - 11:27

        :)

  • [Deactivated] on 18/01/2018 - 16:47
    +2

    Maybe a perception change is best.

    Think of your employment as getting paid to put up with strange smells and clearing the crap from the fridge.

    It's an unpleasant job but someone's gotta do it.

    • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 18:16

      Cleaning the fridge is easy, but I just can't deal with the fact that she can easily throw her half eaten food in the bin or throw it out when she puts a fresh lunch right next to her rotting sandwich. Also, without sounding like an entitled brat, it's not in my contract to be cleaning fridges. Everyone else can remove their food before it rots, why can't she? Especially as the manager shouldn't she be setting an example?

      • cuteseal on 18/01/2018 - 19:51

        Come to think of it, that actually sounds like hoarding behaviour. Some people don’t like to throw anything out and keep piles of stuff - magazines, takeaway containers, wrappers, cardboard boxes etc. can be a mental condition if serious enough.

        What does her desk look like? Are there piles of stuff there too?

        • Redang3lz on 18/01/2018 - 20:38

          It's not so bad that I would classify it as hoarding. Just piles of paperwork. I would call it disorganised rather than hoarding…

        • [Deactivated] on 18/01/2018 - 23:11

          @Redang3lz:
          I've lived with people like that when I was in a college dorm.

          There's nothing an acquaintance can do to change those characteristics. These people would risk loosing their jobs and roof before they'll make a sustainable change.

          I'd put up until I move up (promoted) or move out (leave).

      • [Deactivated] on 19/01/2018 - 10:54
        +6

        she puts a fresh lunch right next to her rotting sandwich

        squash the rotten food in with the fresh food, she'll either get the message or die from food poising. a win either way

        • [Deactivated] on 19/01/2018 - 11:35

          That is an amazing impass.

          Someone give this man more upvotes.

      • Spooked on 19/01/2018 - 23:52

        Don't wash it out. Take it out of fridge, and yoink that container straight into the bin. Quick and easy. It wasn't you!

        If she's willing to let it rot and make it someone else's problem, she can buy new containers. But don't do it on the same day as some people are suggesting, that's not fair.

        Like someone else said, don't get caught, and don't tell anyone else. Fridge to bin, make your coffee, get out. Loose lips sink ships.

      • GregMonarch on 20/01/2018 - 01:38
        +4

        Another thought - everyone buys a decent esky. Leave her the fridge.

        When the fridge fills up she's so lazy she'll stop bringing food rather than empty it. She'll slowly starve to death. Problem solved. ;-p

  • Gronk on 18/01/2018 - 18:56
    +2

    Are you 100% sure it's lack of personal hygiene and not a medical condition? I mean the mouldy food in the fridge would seem to reinforce that viewpoint but it would be an extremely awkward conversation if you were off the mark.

    I had to have the hygiene / deodorant chat with one of my employees a couple of years ago, I think I'd rather go find another job than ever do that again…

    • johnno07 on 19/01/2018 - 08:21

      I'm now curious - what was the condition?

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