Minding Friends Valuables. Ring Has Gone Missing. Whose Fault Is This? What Should I Do?

newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 18:54
Last edited 12/12/2016 - 19:14 by 1 other user

Last weekend friends were playing basketball and asked me to keep their stuff while they were playing (watch, ring, phone, keys etc.)

Today a friend called and said he forgot to get his ring off me?

Even though I placed everything beside me while I was sitting there, I can't recall if I did put the ring in my pocket. So just in-case, I told him I will double check my car and all my pockets (can't remember what I was wearing that day) and will let him know.

He said it was an expensive ring and apparently it is around $2k (didn't look what kind of a ring it was TBH, so can't judge on that).

When I got home today I looked around my car and my all my pants pocket and boom couldn't find it!

I told him and now he thinks i have lost it/kept it? and was asking me to pay for it!
I don't mind paying for it if i did lose it or it was totally my fault.
Still unsure whether I should pay or …?

Geez really hate these situations you can't win.

General Discussion

Comments

  • fossilfuel on 12/12/2016 - 19:06
    +11

    That's why I never entrust something expensive to someone. They might misplace, damage or lose it. Did he physically give it to you? If so, where was that last place you put it?

    I don't think you're at fault. If he's willing to let you hold onto something that expensive, then he's careless and willing to risk losing it.

    • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 19:11
      +1

      yes he did. he gave his watch and cap to me at the same and I put his watch and his ring inside his cap.

      • Kangal on 12/12/2016 - 21:32
        +24

        Tell him he's lucky to have his watch, keys, phone (and digital possession).
        And that you aren't his insurer.

        He didn't pay you for looking after it.
        And you tried your best to mind them for him.
        But at the end of the day, it was not your responsibility. He is mistaken.

        If worst comes to worst, please direct him to this thread so he can see what everyone else thinks.

        So hey, Mr Basketballer…. don't scam your friend. You learned a tough lesson. Move on.

        • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 22:30
          +5

          the last paragraph.

      • bargainslut on 12/12/2016 - 22:35
        +15

        I blame Frodo.

      • singlemalt72 on 13/12/2016 - 12:30
        +13

        Good chance you handed it to him, he put on the watch and the cap without looking and flung the ring away.

  • jsediv on 12/12/2016 - 19:10
    +21

    You're not a safety deposit. If it's gone missing, thats his own fault. He can't expect you to pay for it.

  • Diji1 on 12/12/2016 - 19:10
    -1

    I'd tell your friend forget it, not paying.

    Judge Judy would make you pay though.

    • garffi on 12/12/2016 - 19:13
      +17

      Really? I'd imagine Judge Judy telling the friend to f**k off and go buy another ring.

    • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 19:15
      -5

      i seriously dont want to take it to that stage, i'd pay for it just for the sake of the friendship.
      can't win here i guess.

      • Kangal on 12/12/2016 - 22:47
        +22

        You can be my friend. My rates are cheaper than $2k.
        It's worth it ; )

        And if you like it, you can put a ring on it, oh oh oh!

        • Wystri Warrick on 14/12/2016 - 00:30
          +1

          You can be my friend. My rates are cheaper than $2k.
          It's worth it ; )

          He also sells* a life time of tenderness and devotion.**
          *He is an Ozbargainer.

          **Closest clip I could find.

      • pjcook on 13/12/2016 - 09:47
        +23

        Lets see, he asked you to look after his stuff. He then apparently got it back without ensuring the ring (which I would have though he would have taken out of the hat and put back on his finger) was in the hat. Than upon finding it missing he accused you of stealing it……

        And you value that as a friend……

        OK your call but for me it would be bye bye have a good life….

      • centrelink on 14/12/2016 - 21:58

        How is he certain that it was lost because of you? What about the time between you giving his stuff back and the phone call?

  • bobbified on 12/12/2016 - 19:18
    +3

    What you should do depends on how much you value your friendship.

    A good friend usually wouldn't jump to conclusions and accuse you of stealing his item without any proof, but I can understand if he may have made those accusations out of initial anger. If after a few days he keeps insisting that you stole it, then I would really start to wonder.

    I think the majority of it is his fault and I say that because if it's such a valuable ring, he would've thought about trusting someone else to look after it. And he wouldn't have forgotten about it at the end of the game if it meant that much to him - I bet the first thing he remembered was his phone.

    It's not really reasonable to suggest an "inventory count" every time a mate asks you to look after their stuff. Especially if it was the property of a few people you were looking after. Was it a few people's belongings bundled together? Is it possible that someone else may have accidently picked it up?

    Whatever it is, if my mate was accusing me of theft, I defnitely wouldn't be paying for it. Simply because I would almost feel like it's an admission of guilt.

    On the other hand, if I knew that it meant a lot to him and he couldn't really afford a new one (and he wasn't accusing me), I'd go out and get him another one.

    • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 19:24
      +2

      his not my friend TBH we have a mutual friend who was also there playing.

      i had his ring and watch inside his cap so dont think the other guy might have accidentally took it.

      I tied up his watch to his cap just so that they be together and looked at the watch and it was one of these fake cheap random brand watches, wish it was his watch that was gone missing.

      • bobbified on 12/12/2016 - 19:31
        +14

        In that case, do you even trust that the ring is worth the $2k that he claims?

        I would really be talking to the mutual friend first.

      • singlemalt72 on 13/12/2016 - 12:32

        I always put my ring onto my watch band, but it isn't one of those 'continuous' types just 2 bands and a buckle.

      • RandomNinja on 14/12/2016 - 16:27
        +1

        If he's not a friend you care about, then just tell him you gave it back to him that day. What he's done with it after is not your responsibility

  • jsediv on 12/12/2016 - 19:22
    +11

    If you end up paying for his ring, do you mind holding onto a few of mine too?

    • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 19:25
      +3

      never again. i didn't ask to keep his stuff he just handed to me.

      • Findo on 12/12/2016 - 20:08
        +17

        Then don't pay

  • aussieprepper on 12/12/2016 - 20:14
    +4

    What kind of mate would make you pay? Is he even a friend? My mates have broken and lost my stuff i just write it of because i have done the same to them by accident.
    If its my family it will be a different story i will make them pay lol My bro my Tripod hes a goof he didn't care he was in my work shop i went of and mum offered to replace it. We know how he is that is why she offered.

  • apple2016 on 12/12/2016 - 20:34
    +2

    If you friend is asking you to pay then he does not consider you as his friend at all. You do not have anything to loose in saying that you are not going to pay!…

  • hamza23 on 12/12/2016 - 20:36
    +12

    This person isn't your friend to make such a request so you aren't risking ruining anything. Tell them that you are sorry but you've looked everywhere and can't find it, nor can you remember it but hope that they find it. You aren't liable, nor do you even know that this is legitimate and that the ring exists/is really valued at that much. You don't owe them a thing and don't let them take advantage of your good nature.

  • chumlee on 12/12/2016 - 20:42
    +15

    $2K ring?? He's hustling you. Ask for the receipt and a photo of him with the ring in the photo.

    • bargdebarg on 14/12/2016 - 22:37
      +1

      Yeah sounds like a classic scam mate. Don't pay. If he really valued it he would have it insured and wouldn't let it out of his sight. Totally his fault.

  • bluedufflecoat on 12/12/2016 - 21:02
    +4

    Maybe it's covered under his insurance if he has any contents insurance? There will be an excess but $500 is better than $2k.

      • BartholemewH on 14/12/2016 - 21:30

        Or tell him to blow it out his a***.

  • mskeggs on 12/12/2016 - 21:27
    +3

    Surely you gave it back to him when you returned his cap and watch? Did you remove it from where he left it?
    You aren't responsible if he has subsequently lost it.

    • newbiesh on 12/12/2016 - 22:38
      +3

      Yea i handed in everything I had and i was there with him for the rest of the day, wish he asked me then so we could've gone back and searched that area.
      i just looked around in my car so I could find it and see if it was really a $2k ring…

      • Kangal on 12/12/2016 - 22:52
        +14

        If it really was that valuable… why didn't he loop his ring in the keyring with the keys ?!??
        Even an idiot could think of doing so.

  • Adz81 on 12/12/2016 - 21:35
    +7

    Friends don't ask friends to pay for crap left with a friend to watch.

    This belief is also why I've only ever been asked to watch my friends kids that one time.

    It's a win win situation all round… 'cept for that one time.

    • Kangal on 12/12/2016 - 22:54
      +1

      How much compensation did your friend want for losing his kids?
      Or did he have to pay you for the favour?

      You can tell me, it was an insurance job wasn't it ; )

      • Adz81 on 12/12/2016 - 23:08
        +4

        All I know is the following conversation occurred:
        Me: ummm, "friend", little xyz is getting kinda close to the pool…
        Friend: Nah, don't worry about it…
        Me: Seriously, she's really close to the pool…
        Friend: FFS, don't worry about it, I'll hear the splash.

  • wei13 on 12/12/2016 - 22:30
    +7

    Quite funny. Don't think you need to engage in too much conversation with him.

    Passing your stuff to a mutual friend for minding during a basketball game does not transfer your responsibility.

    Just tell him you've looked and don't have it, and leave it at that. The rest is his problem.

    I do have suspicion he is bluffing. I wouldn't take a $2k ring to a basketball game, I wouldn't pass it to a mutual friend, and it would be the first thing I'd check for and not days later.

  • sparkles on 12/12/2016 - 23:02
    +13

    Unless it's a diamond ring, how many guys rings would legitimately be worth $2k anyway? It sounds suss.

    • Luckyuser on 13/12/2016 - 03:38
      +4

      Exactly what I was thinking..
      Sounds like he's trying to scam you into paying for something that either he lost himself or was nowhere near 2k in value.

      I wouldn't pay a dime.

    • BartholemewH on 14/12/2016 - 21:34

      My wedding ring is palladium and worth about $1400. In platinum it would be in the high teens. Mens rings at $2k+ are relatively rare imo.

  • garetz on 12/12/2016 - 23:46
    +2

    Would a true friend ask you to pay for the ring ? The way he is acting is showing you how much he values your friendship, and thats 2k. Do you really want to keep a friend like that ?

  • Limitless on 13/12/2016 - 01:38
    +7

    It must not be worth all that much if he only remembered it was missing when he got home. If i gave 2k to an acquaintance to watch i would make sure i got it back before i left!

    Sounds like he lost it and wants you to pay. You don't need people like that in your life!!!

  • whooah1979 on 13/12/2016 - 06:22
    -5

    I put his watch and his ring inside his cap.

    how careless can one be to do this with valuables? the watch and ring should have been kept in the pockets or the ring on ones finger and the watch on the wrist. it's common sense.

  • shaybisc on 13/12/2016 - 08:52
    +1

    What a screwup. It will be a burr under the saddle as far as your relationship goes for a long time. Maybe in ten years time you can both laugh about it, if you are still speaking to each other.

  • LyndonBBear on 13/12/2016 - 12:40

    Did you actually sight the ring? Or is he just saying that he gave you the ring along with his keys, phone, wallet etc? Can you go back to the place and have a good look around? I too think he is playing you. If it was actually worth $2k, then he should have it covered by his own insurance at the outset.

  • Tihocan on 13/12/2016 - 14:36

    Chances are if you put it in his cap, then he lost it from his cap. I'm willing to bet you don't remember putting it in your pocket, because you didn't.
    His loss, and sounds like a friendship not worth working around, to be honest.

  • phocus on 13/12/2016 - 15:24

    When I got home today I looked around my car and my all my pants pocket and boom…

    Was i the only one expecting to read "and boom I found it"

  • ozbjunkie on 13/12/2016 - 17:16
    +1

    As other said - if he noticed at the time he got his phone that his ring was missing, maybe you'd have something to answer before…

    But he didn't notice, so he probably lost it elsewhere. if he's absent minded enough to not check after the game, then he is absent minded enough to have lost it sometime after the game (on way to the car…)

  • Brendoo on 14/12/2016 - 04:02
    +3

    This sounds very strange. Why does the person wait a day or two to ask for the ring back?! Anyone who just handed you their valuables while they were playing sport would check everything is there when you gave them back after the game, and most likely put the ring and watch on at the same time!

    A friend would not blame you or ask you to pay. He could have lost them himself! If you don't have them, then he certainly lost them if you handed everything back in the cap.

    Sounds like he's trying to scam you out of $2k by making you feel guilty for something you didn't do. Don't cave in.

  • ramb9 on 14/12/2016 - 12:54

    Yep, definitely sounds like a scam.

    The guys just dodgy and trying to make a quick buck.

    You sound really gullible OP. Sounds like they just wanna make $$ from you since it seems easy.

  • fozzie on 14/12/2016 - 15:29
    +1

    Why on earth would he wear a $2000 ring when he knew he had to play?Scam surely.

  • KaTst3R on 14/12/2016 - 15:39

    If I am about to play basketball (or any sports for that matter), I would leave my "expensive" ring and watch at home and slap on the cheap casio watch. It makes no sense to bring all your luxury shit to a ball game and risk having it stolen.

  • ThithLord on 14/12/2016 - 15:49
    +5

    If it went missing during the time you were holding on to it, this would be a different story. If you've handed back his possessions and he didn't realise his $2K ring wasn't there, then that's bullshit.

    Don't pay him a cent.

  • ronnknee on 14/12/2016 - 17:06
    +2

    Not sure what kind of friend they are to expect you to fork out $2000 for the ring.

    Anyway, beside the point. Why hadn't he noticed on the spot? If he came to pickup his items and it was missing, then yea, it would be a bit suspicious and careless. But the fact it was noticed a few days later, he could've collected it off you already and lost it himself. You've washed your hands after he had collected everything off you that day. You are not at fault.

  • yoonibear on 14/12/2016 - 17:53

    How "new" is this friendship? Friends that are close don't auto assume that you've kept it.
    Honestly, sounds like he's taking you for a ride. 2k ring - he'd have notice whether or not he had an expensive ring on his hand when he left.

  • dlf73 on 14/12/2016 - 18:17
    +2

    Why did this person not ask where the ring was when collecting their stuff from you at the end of the game, instead of waiting a day or two and then accusing you of loosing it? It seems to me you gave back what was given to you………otherwise on the spot you would have been asked wheres my ring!

  • fruit on 14/12/2016 - 18:23
    +2

    Probably a scam

    • brokenglish on 14/12/2016 - 21:03

      ^ +1
      OP, you need to think the other way. He could be lying to you.

  • Meowcat on 14/12/2016 - 18:37

    Tell em to get stuffed

  • tj101 on 14/12/2016 - 19:26

    As a 'volunteer' you are not responsible. You were doing a favour, if he wanted a professional to watch his stuff, he can pay them lol- then if they lost his stuff they would pay. Even if you took responsibility and decided to pay for the ring, you would pay for the depreciated value of the ring, not the cost of buying a brand new ring from a jewellers.

  • knk on 14/12/2016 - 19:27

    A real friend wouldn't ask for the 2k. Unfortunate situation yes, however it's more unfortunate you have someone like that as a friend lol.

  • whodidthat on 14/12/2016 - 19:47
    -1

    From a legal point of view, you assumed the risk by agreeing to look after his stuff.

    But I don't think your friend is handling the situation very well.

    • whodidthat on 15/12/2016 - 11:20

      Whatever

    • voteoften on 16/12/2016 - 04:00

      I think you are only responsible if you have been paid to look after it. It might be called bailment under common law.

      • whodidthat on 16/12/2016 - 10:29

        You may be right and the law may be different in Australia but I do know of cases in UK & USA where people were taken to court for losing someone else's property (friends, relatives) they had possession of (ie: looking after it) and the property owners won their cases.

  • 0FoxGiven on 14/12/2016 - 20:30
    +1
    1. If there really was ring he would have noticed it was missing the same day. If it were a 2k ring, he would notice it was missing in less than an hour
    2. If it was in a cap, it is very likely he just flung it out when he took the cap back from you.
    3. You are under no obligation to pay for it. If a random guy walks up to me and tell me to hold two thousand dollars for him without paying for my money-holding services and the risk I bear, he really cant expect me to hold on to it successfully.
    • Zarcady on 14/12/2016 - 21:11
      +1

      Yep, no way its worth 2k and hes hussling you. He would have known straight awat his ring was missing if its worth that much. I know it can be hard to say no sometimes but this is one of those times. Good luck OP

  • LlamaOfDoom on 14/12/2016 - 21:02

    Last weekend friends were playing basketball and asked me to keep their stuff while they were playing (watch, ring, phone, keys etc.)

    Today a friend called and said he forgot to get his ring off me?

    If last weekend means 3-4 December, tell him to get stuffed!
    If last weekend means the day before you posted, say "look man, I'm sorry, but I'm sure the ring was still in your hat when you took them back".

    Asking you to pay in either case is insane.

  • easternculture on 14/12/2016 - 22:41

    Is your friend from Nigeria?

  • Chilli-chilli on 15/12/2016 - 07:29
    +1

    Tell him, 'It was Gollum. Gollum was on the loose that day.'
    If he said that you're delusional n insist you to pay the ring then reply with,'Not as delusional as you are thinking I will pay for the ring.'

    :D

  • BuyoTheCat on 15/12/2016 - 09:09

    What kind of ring cost $2000?
    How many guys do you know wear a ring that cost $2000?
    Who wears a $2000 ring to go play basketball?

  • Archi on 15/12/2016 - 11:13
    +2

    tell him you gave it back to him, because it was in the hat along with everything else,

    if it was important to him we would have known straight away he didn't have the ring. so obviously he doesn't care for the ring regardless of the value.

    if he values your friendship he wont make a big deal about it and accept the loss and move on..

    if he becomes dick about it say you would share the cost of the ring if he can provide evidence of the value. or you can take his word for it..

    if he is still a dick and insists you are responsible… then this is not a friendship work your keeping…

    tell him to 'F' off and give him a dollar coin and tell him to call someone who cares.

  • tonka on 15/12/2016 - 23:31
    +1

    He lost the ring not you. Even if he'd handed it to you then noticed you didn't give it back then he still lost it but you helped.
    But the dude doesn't sound like a friend and unless you were very sure you were negligent and wanted to pay you shouldn't be giving him anything.

  • Slippery Fish on 16/12/2016 - 10:38
    +2

    What kind of knob doesnt check on the spot he got a 2k ring back, then takes ages to notice.

    Scam. Scam. Scam. Scam. Scam. Or (profanity).

    donotpay

    • BertieBrown on 16/12/2016 - 13:25
      +1

      Yep. I cannot see how this is not almost definitely some kind of scam/swindle at the OP's expense.

  • shaybisc on 16/12/2016 - 18:50

    Jeez you lot must have great friends if you all reach the conclusion this bloke's "friend" is scamming him.

  • Name on 16/12/2016 - 20:35

    I wish I knew you so I could slap you for even contemplating paying this guy. There is no way you'd not miss a $2k ring when picking up a few things you left with someone you barely know. In fact who'd trust leaving a $2k ring with an acquaintance.

    If you're seriously going to pay him, which I hope you aren't, ask for a receipt of the ring, a photo of him wearing it,this coupled with a police report where he has reported it lost. These are the things that an insurance company would ask for.

  • cst on 17/12/2016 - 08:27
    +1

    Sounds very dodgy to me. He doesn't sound trustworthy. I don't think you can be certain it is really lost, or worth $2000. I think he is scamming you. Please don't pay.

  • newbiesh on 17/12/2016 - 18:48
    +4

    Update: I haven't received a call/txt anything from him since our last discussion.
    Might have found it himself or waiting for me to respond which am not gonna do.

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